Page 51 of Rear View
Ryah
The Parc Ferme fell deathly silent, the pounding of my pulse the only sound. I stared at Xavier, lost. Completely and utterly lost.
My chest hurt, the drumming of my heart hard against my ribs as Xavier’s crew and security piled in, trying to pry him off his father, who gasped for air.
“X!” Alec roared, hooking his arms around Xavier’s waist before he pulled. Yara joined him next, then Earl and my father. Five people later, and they tore him away.
His hands were bloodied, his chest heaving, his expression savage.
Zoya slipped her arm through mine, while Mom stood wide-eyed beside me, her hands over her cheeks.
Spitting to the side, Peter offered Xavier a bloodstained grin. “ Now they know the real you.” He turned that grin on me and winked.
Xavier lunged again, but the army at his back kept him at bay as he roared, “Fly the fuck outta here!”
Security closed in, getting between them, and, a second later, dragged a laughing Peter and his sleazy sidekick, Derek, away.
“Assholes,” Zoya mumbled.
I wanted to go to Xavier, but with so many cameras around, the walls started closing in. God, so many cameras. It stole the air from my lungs, making it impossible to breathe. I rubbed the scar over my brow. My soul hurt in ways I didn’t know it could.
“Let me go!” Xavier snarled. “LET ME FUCKIN’ GO!”
Arms flew up when they released him. His feet pounded the concrete as he approached me fast. “Ryah,” he said, words strained. “I’m sorry, darlin’. I’m so fuckin’ sorry.”
I didn’t know what expression painted my face, but he winced at the sight of it.
Mom gave my hand a squeeze. “We’ll be just over here, sweetheart,” she said, pointing off to the right before she and Z edged aside to give us space.
A storm of flashes fired when photo after photo was snapped. Ducking my head, I hid behind the curtain of my hair, twisting my fingers in the hem of my coat sleeve while I tried to gather my thoughts.
Xavier moved in front of me, his towering, broad frame blocking me from sight.
My pulse thrashed in my ears. His father, that threat, the spotlight, it was all too real. Too much. “This isn’t your fault,” I uttered, barely recognizing my own feeble voice.
He dragged a hand through his hair so hard, it pulled his scalp. His expression was tight, as if he was warring with himself. “Nah, dream girl. I should’ve known.”
Somewhere nearby, a phone rang.
Another flash.
I inhaled slowly as tears stung the backs of my eyes and blurred my vision. For him. For his career. What more could his father take?
His chest caved, his stare tracking wildly between my own as he shook his head. He reached for me, took my hand and pulled it to him.
Something in the way those arctic eyes looked at me hit different…like he was terrified.
“Xavier,” Earl called, then gestured to his left. Ten feet away, several official people wearing WRC lanyards and expensive-looking suits crossed into the Parc Ferme.
Xavier swallowed hard and told him, “Gimme a minute.”
My mind was lost in a sea of pain and those tears slipped free, trailing my face until they rolled from my chin.
“Don’t cry, darlin’.” He tracked his thumb across my cheek, swiping those tears away. “You’re my goddamn world, Ryah. You’re fuckin’ everything to me. Everything. ” His eyes turned bloodshot and glassy. “You don’t deserve this.” He cleared his throat. “And I don’t deserve you.”
“No,” I breathed as my ribs locked painfully tight. He couldn’t mean that. I shook my head. “Don’t say that, Xavier. Don’t ever say that.”
The man shielded people to keep them safe. It’s what he did. He’d do anything to protect me, even if it was from himself, or his past, because he knew what I dealt with. Knew I was afraid.
Zoya closed in. “Ry,” she said, her voice meek.
I held Xavier’s gaze for several long seconds before I turned her way.
“I, um. That was Stan. He says he and the dean need to meet with you immediately.”
I drew my head back and opened my mouth, then closed it, then opened it again. It was a Saturday. It wasn’t that U of E was closed, but nor was the faculty generally around. I furrowed my brows, deep. “What?”
“He said they need you to come and meet them at the psych building.”
If the dean was there… “It’s gotta be about the complaint I filed.”
Xavier straightened his spine, raising himself to his full height. “I’ll take you.”
“X, man,” Alec said, edging in before he dropped a hand on Xavier’s shoulder. He tipped his chin to the side. “They wanna talk.”
My rally driver shook his head.
I had no clue what this all meant for his career, but nor was I about to let him risk it more by leaving. Not for me. “You should stay”—I gestured to the officials—“figure this out.”
He tensed and shoved his hands in his pockets as if he tried to keep from reaching for me, then stared down at the ground. Alone. He looked so alone.
My heart skipped a beat. “I’m coming back, Xavier.”
His shoulders and neck were tight, voice thick when he replied, “Yeah.”
The sheer panic in his gaze was agony to see. Stepping forward, I set a palm over his abdomen, twisting my fingers in his shirt as I promised, “I’m coming back.”
He shuddered when his hold landed over mine, cinching tight as those arctic eyes tracked my own.
The last thing I wanted was to abandon him, so I scanned the faces in the room until I found my mother, then mouthed, “Stay with him, please.”
A tear slipped down her cheek, palm landing over her heart. “Of course, sweetheart,” she mouthed back.
Lowering my arm, I stepped back and told Xavier, “We’ll talk later, alright?”
He cleared his throat, then cleared it again. “Later.”
I took a step away. “Goodbye, Xavier,” I said before I turned on my heel, fell in beside Zoya and walked away.