Page 48 of Rear View

Ryah

I didn’t move. Didn’t breathe. My mind tripped and stuttered, trying to absorb his words. Xavier had gone to…jail.

“It’s not who I am,” he said, his voice thick while his hands cinched over my hips. “I just… I needed to stop my old man, and it was the only way.” The muscles of his torso corded as if he was bracing himself when those arctic eyes found mine. “Say somethin’, darlin’.”

There weren’t thoughts, only questions. “How long?”

His expression turned tortured. “Twenty-two months.”

My heart thumped a heavy beat. Everything. His father’d taken everything from him. His childhood, his mother and Fallon, then nearly two years of his life.

“You didn’t tell me,” I breathed, not mad, because I’d kept a secret of my own. But it still hurt.

He must have read that in my tone because his head fell.

“I’m so fuckin’ sorry, Ryah.” He shook his head.

“I was a juvenile when it happened, so it was cleared from my record. I don’t talk about it ’cause if our sponsors or the WRC found out, we’d lose everything.

I should’ve spoke up, but I was so damn scared you’d see me dif ferent.

” He flexed his grip against me. “But I get if this changes things for you.”

Changes things?

The hollow look in his eyes was so desolate, it clawed at my heart. Why he’d ever think I’d judge him or feel any type of way about what he’d done… God. He’d saved his mother. Saved himself .

There were a hundred things I needed to say—things he needed to hear—but one rose above them all.

“I see you , Xavier. I don’t see your father or your past. I see the man who did what he had to do.

The man who pulled me from the dark and gave me life.

The man I never want to lose.” I settled my palms against the five-o’clock shadow along his jaw before I pulled his gaze to mine.

“And I see the man I love with everything I have.”

The air hitched in his lungs and his chest caved. He dropped his head to my shoulder, his arms banding my waist like a vise, as if he needed to feel me. Breathe me. “I love you too. So fuckin’ much.”

If I understood anything, it was threats, and his dad coming there, to Xavier’s home, was a message of its own. That he knew where Xavier was. That he could get to him. The idea of it had my fear cresting, but for once in my life, not for myself.

“I hate your father. Hate that you had to stop him. That no one helped you or your mom. That no one was there. You didn’t deserve that.”

Angling to the side, he pressed his face into the crook of my neck. “And what did I deserve?”

“Better, Xavier.” I plunged my fingers into his hair. “You deserved better.”

He shook his head slowly as he burrowed deeper. “You’re too good for me.”

My chest ached, because his agony almost cleaved me in two. I wanted to take that pain away. I had so many words, but words weren’t enough. He needed to see I was there for him the way he was for me. Needed to feel it.

Gently, I guided him back and softened my gaze. “Thank you for telling me.” I twisted my fingers around the hem of my dress before, slowly, I drew it over my head, baring my white lace bra and panties to him.

He stilled, his stare raking my body. His cock jumped, pressing into my core before, gradually, he arched a brow. “You tryin’ to tell me somethin’, dream girl?”

I laughed. “I’m trying to show you, rally boy .” I flicked the button on his jeans with my thumb, unlatching them. I drew down his zipper, nice and slow, dragging out that torture.

Sliding my hand inside his boxers, I wrapped it around his hard shaft and stroked down, down, down.

When I reached the base, I gripped it, then slid my panties aside, maneuvered into position and lowered myself onto him.

He groaned deep in the recesses of his chest as I took him to the hilt, then stilled, giving myself a second to adjust to his size.

Those thick, calloused hands locked over my hips as I rocked, grinding down on him.

“Jesus.” His head fell back as he sucked air through his teeth, then thrust up hard, pumping into me.

I gasped and clutched his shoulders to brace. I tipped my face down, my attention fixed on his cock.

“You love watching me fuck you,” he said, all brash and confident.

And I was happy that my Xavier was back, because I loved that side of him. A side no one else got to see. Something that was mine and mine alone.

He pulled out nice and slow, making a show of it. I whimpered and he offered a smug smirk when he pushed back in.

Licking the pad of his thumb, he pressed it to my clit. A riot of pleasure exploded through me as my body arced forward. His lips found my throat and he kissed me hard, tasting his way south. He dragged my lace bra down, and sucked my peaked nipple into his mouth, working it with his tongue.

My fingers buckled the skin over his shoulders, encouraging. Taking it between his teeth, he bit down, easy, but enough to tear a husky moan from my lips.

He locked his stare on his cock as it filled me. “Tell me what else you want from me, darlin’.”

I blushed, because there was something.

“Shy Ryah’s my favorite Ryah,” he said, his words a low rasp. “But right now, you ain’t gotta be shy with me. I’ll give you anything.” He thrust up again and my body jolted. “Just tell me what it is, and it’s yours.”

I loved it when he got rough. And I wanted him to work out whatever was happening inside that head of his. Wanted him to use my body to do it. “Fuck me from behind,” I said, shocked at my own bluntness.

That smirk lifted higher. “Livin’ for that filthy little mouth right now.” He shifted me off, and I pouted at the loss of him, until he rose to his full height, then loomed over me and ordered, “On your knees, and grab the back of the couch.”

My breasts heaved with the franticness of my breaths as I did what I was told, pushing my ass toward him. He released the snaps on my bra before raking his palms down my spine. Hooking his fingers into my thong, he dragged it over my curves, leaving me completely naked.

“You’re a goddess,” he uttered, then glided a knuckle between my folds and set it against my clit.

I mewled, pressing into him.

“You like that?”

I bobbed my head. “Mm-hmm.” My eyes met his over my shoulder. “Don’t be gentle.”

He growled. “You keep talkin’ like that, and I’m gonna come all over that pretty little ass before I can start.”

My thighs clenched, and it was a good thing I was already on my knees because they went weak.

Rolling his shoulders, he said, “Imma need both hands for this, so you’re gonna have to touch yourself now, yeah?”

I loved the way he talked to me. Dirty and raw. It made me so wet, I was almost dripping. Biting my lip, I made a show of sliding my touch down to my slit.

He gripped his cock and gave it a stroke as he leaned back to get a better view. “That’s real fuckin’ hot, Ryah.” He gave my ass a light smack. “Spread your legs wider.”

When I was in position, he lowered a knee to the edge of the cushion, then set his tip to my core. Reaching for my hair, he twisted it around his wrist. Our eyes met. “Hold on, darlin.” His hips bucked, slamming into me until he filled my slick center with his entire length.

Oh, God! It felt so good. My body ignited, my nerves lighting like fireworks. Pleasure exploded through me, and I greedily clenched around him.

I gasped and he unleashed, his thrusts almost punishing as he worked me.

“This what you wanted?” he said, his words forced through a harsh breath.

My head dipped in a nod as I panted harder. “Just like that.”

He sealed his free hand around my waist and dragged me closer until I took him to the root. Every spectacular inch. I moaned when he locked me in place, then rolled his cock back and forth, pressing it into my G-spot.

“Xavier!”

“That’s it.” He pulled back, his hand kneading my ass before he pistoned into me again.

I clenched around him, and he grunted.

“Christ,” he snarled.

My peak edged in, fast. “I’m close,” I said, the words broken against his onslaught. “Don’t stop.” Don’t ever stop!

His cock pulsed against me. “Come for me, darlin’.”

I cried out and let loose, one hand working my clit while the other grasped the couch, buckling the material there. I threw my head back as I seized around him, that ecstasy overtaking me. I screamed his name once, twice, pushing to meet his pace.

“Shit,” he snarled, gripping me hard like he braced himself. His orgasm hit, and he roared, his shaft twitching as his cum flooded me. He thrust again and again, riding the last of that high. He kept pumping until, gradually, he slowed, then stopped altogether, and withdrew.

Clamping an arm around my waist, he pulled me to his chest and my sated body fell limp. Settling us back onto the couch, he twisted until I sat across his lap. I purred, nuzzling closer as I pressed my face into his neck and we caught our breath.

“Thank you,” I said, so damn happy.

He grinned, tucked me tighter to him, then snagged the blanket on the side of the sofa, and threw it over us. “My fuckin’ pleasure, dream girl.”

* * *

Mom veered us through Edgewater’s morning traffic, rush hour forcing the freeway to a standstill.

The sun was shining, the sky blue and cloudless, but the air was cold. Snow skittered across the ground, refusing to stick. A sign of the frigid temperatures.

“That Officer Maynard is a useless beast of a man,” Mom said, gloved hands ringing the steering wheel like she was picturing them around his neck.

I huffed a laugh, my leather seat groaning as I shifted farther into it. “You’re telling me.”

She’d insisted we call and speak to him. Pressure him into action, something. And true to his pointless form, he’d sloughed her off too.

My gaze landed on my lap. After living on my own so long, it felt weird to be back at home, but so, so good to sleep at night. I missed Xavier and the calm he brought. Missed his warmth and his touch. Couldn’t wait to see him in Baythorn for his race.