Page 32

THIRTY-TWO

jack

“Jesus, Jack,” Rex says when he comes into to the reception area of his office.

“What the hell happened that you needed me to get all these guys together?”

I step out of the elevator and scrape a hand down the front of my face.

“Is everyone here?”

He nods.

“Yeah, in the conference room. Marcus Taylor, Coach Enver, Bob Marshall, and Eli Davidson. Everyone’s waiting. Are you going to tell me what happened with that reporter? Was it about the kid? The dad? What was so urgent that you needed all of them in one place?”

“It’s bigger than the assault.” I square my shoulders.

“Let’s go to the conference room. We have a lot to talk about.”

Everyone stands up from the table when I walk through the door.

Marcus, my lawyer, speaks up first. “Jack, I just got off the phone with the father’s lawyer. He’s not dropping the assault charges. Says you have no proof and now he’s accusing you of defamation of character.”

I shake my head.

“Not good, but there’s another reason why I had Rex call this meeting. Look, I know I caused the team a lot of headaches when that video leaked. And for all I know, you might be thinking of cutting me because of the bad press you’re getting. I don’t blame you if that’s the case. It was stupid and I didn’t think it through, but I had my reasons.”

Sinking into a chair, I lean forward with my head in my hands.

“But there’s something else I need to tell you about. Something that happened a long time ago and it’s coming back to bite me in the ass. I’m only telling you because we need to get ahead of it.” I raise my head to look at them.

“If you decided to keep me.”

Coach and Bob, the GM, exchange a look.

I know they’re probably flipping out at what I might say next.

But they need to hear it from me.

“Fuck,” Rex mutters.

“We have the press conference scheduled for tomorrow. Do I need to update the statement?”

“I’m thinking that might be a good idea.” With a deep sigh, I drop my hands on the table.

“Years ago, back in my junior hockey days, there was a short period of time I took PEDs. Very short, like a week. But I stopped because I didn’t want to get caught and screw up my career.”

Bob scrubs a hand down the front of his face and Coach Enver just shakes his head.

“It was too late.” I take a deep breath.

“After a surprise drug test, my coach, Alex Dalton, told me he’d keep my secret under one condition. He blackmailed me. Made me do things…” I squeeze my eyes shut for a long minute, trying to forget, and press my fingers to my forehead.

“I was desperate. I needed to make it into the AHL and I figured PEDs were the only way I’d get there for sure. I couldn’t go back home after junior hockey. My father…he was abusive. Things were bad. He'd kicked me out of the house. Tried to…kill me one night when he was drunk.”

“Jesus,” Eli, the team publicist, mutters .

“I’m not telling you all this because I want your sympathy or your pity. That’s the last thing I want. But you need to know because this story is gonna come out and I have to own it, no matter what. I’m tired of worrying and wondering when the rug’s gonna be pulled out from under me. I made stupid, desperate choices and I have to live with them. But it’s gonna be on my terms, nobody else’s.”

“Wait,” Marcus interrupts. “I actually just heard some things about Alex Dalton. Apparently, several players from past teams he’s coached have come forward with stories about how he blackmailed and sexually assaulted them. Supposedly he falsified drug test results to use as leverage against the guys.”

“That motherfucker,” I mutter. “But in my case, I’m pretty sure the evidence is real. He pulled some strings to get me into the AHL, held it all over my head and said if I ever spoke a word of what happened between us, he’d crush me with those test results. He must have known that these people were coming forward because he approached me at an event recently, threatened me again after having me beaten up by a bunch of thugs as a warning. He wanted me to keep quiet. I didn’t know there was anyone else. Figured I was the only one.”

“Yes, there are several others who’ve spoken out and likely many more who were also threatened. Obviously there’s power in numbers. He would have wanted you to keep quiet because of your celebrity status,” Rex says.

“This is gonna cripple my career,” I say, raking a hand through my hair. “But I’ve gotta come clean about it. Gotta own it. He’ll expose me if he’s charged because he’ll assume I came forward as a whistleblower. And I want to be in control of the narrative. I fucked up. Big time. And maybe nobody will care why I did what I did. But I can’t hold onto this any longer. It’s part of the reason why I went after the kid’s father. I won’t excuse the behavior, but it’s what I dealt with myself. I know deadbeat fathers because I have one.”

“Are you sure you want to come out with that whole story, Jack?” Eli asks. “It’s a lot and there will be consequences.”

“I know. But it’s gonna come out anyway. And I get it if you want to remove me from the team. I know this is gonna be a media nightmare for everyone.”

“Jack, the team stands behind you,” Coach Enver says. “I’m sorry you had to go through all that, but everyone makes mistakes and you’re a hell of a player. We don’t want to lose you.”

“Enver’s right,” Bob says. “We stand behind you. It’s not the ideal situation and Eli will need to work with Rex to craft a statement, but team management and ownership is in agreement.” He sighs and sits back in his chair. “It’s not right to turn your back on your players and crucify them for decisions they made under duress. The assault…” He shakes his head. “We do not approve, regardless of what may have triggered you. But we’ll do whatever we can to appease all involved. We may need to take some action, but we have no intention of cutting you from the team.”

“With the assault charge on you, I’m not sure how tolerant or understanding the public will be,” Marcus says, stroking his chin. “But if anyone can spin it, Rex can.”

“No,” I say. “I don’t want to ‘spin’ anything. It happened. I did everything they’re gonna accuse me of. And if I’m gonna be condemned by the public, then it is what it is. At least they’ll get the full story. Let them judge. Everyone makes mistakes, especially kids who were in abusive situations with nobody to turn to. You trust whoever you think you can trust and sometimes, it’s the wrong decision. I learned that lesson,” I say stiffly, my mind tripping back to Carter’s face earlier this morning.

“Dalton really sent guys to beat you up?” Enver says incredulously. “That’s why you were all bruised when we went to Ohio?”

“Yeah,” I say. “I didn’t realize it at the time because they didn’t tell me who’d sent them. Just roughed me up a little bit. And I’m pretty sure he had something to do with that mob scene, too. I’d never had that experience in Ohio and I’ve played there a ton. He left a note in my room, too. More threats about someone ‘watching me.’ He pretty much admitted to it all when I saw him at that event. I guess Dalton saw this coming and wanted to make sure I kept quiet and didn’t add fuel to the fire.”

“Well, he’s gonna burn based on the allegations I’m hearing,” Marcus says.

“You’re sure you want to do this?” Rex asks, looking at me, uncertainty seeping into his expression. “I don’t love you throwing yourself to the wolves like this. It can make the situation with the kid even worse.”

“I don’t care. And I have to hope that the kid can get out of that situation because I promise you, his dad is hurting him. He’s a bad guy.” I look between the tense faces of everyone at the table. “I knew it the first time I saw the bruises on the kid’s body, and I know it now. Nobody can convince me I’m wrong.”

Rex nods. “Okay, well, I respect that you want to control the story. But I can’t promise that things won’t blow up after your statement. I’ve seen athletes lose endorsement deals for way less, so expect that. I’ll try to stop the bleeding as best as I can, but I’m not a miracle worker.”

“I know, and I appreciate any help I can get. I just need this to be out there so I can put it behind me. It’s been chasing me for too long.”

We work on a statement for the next hour or so until everyone is happy with it .

“And what about Carter?” Rex asks. “What does he say about all of this?”

My eyes narrow. “Why should I give a damn what he thinks?”

Rex recoils. “Well, people are going to ask questions. They know you played together, that you play together now. You’ve been seen together socially. I just figured you might have spoken to him about this. He was there the day of the assault. He could be called upon as a witness.”

“Right now, that doesn’t really matter, right?” I snap. “I mean, you’re not his publicist, so why do you even care?”

Rex’s eyebrows furrow. “Well, from a character standpoint, having him stand by you would be helpful since he’s got celebrity status, too, and is a fan favorite.”

“ Character ,” I snort. “That’s an ironic word to use.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Rex and Eli exchange a confused look.

“If we’re done here, I need to go,” I say, shoving my chair backward. The feet squeak and scrape across the shiny hardwood floor. “I’ll see you all tomorrow. I need to take some time by myself. Thanks for coming and for standing by me. It really means a lot, and I know what you’re all putting on the line for me.”

I turn and walk out of the conference room without looking back. I hear them talking in hushed voices as I walk down the hallway and I know I’ve left them in the lurch. But I’m damn thankful they didn’t do the same to me.

Since it’s Sunday, nobody else is here in the office, and thank fuck for that because I’m not in the mood to deal with anyone. I just wanna go home and shut out the rest of the world until I need to bare my soul tomorrow in front of the press .

I stab the Down button next to the elevator and pace with my arms folded over my chest.

Character.

Insinuating that Carter’s character is stronger than mine. What a fucking joke. If they only knew the truth and the fucking mountains of lies the guy can tell as easily as he smiles.

No. Do not think about his fucking smile right now.

I grit my teeth, stabbing the Down button again.

The elevator doors finally slide open and I stomp into the waiting car, again stabbing the close door button about ten times more than necessary.

Anger rumbles deep in my chest and I want more than anything to unleash it on the asshole who cut me deeper than any of the other shit being slung at me right now.

The elevator dings in the parking garage level. The doors creak open and my breath hitches.

I ball my fingers into tight fists, each one itching to hurl itself at Carter’s chiseled jaw. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I…I…” He snaps his mouth shut, his face drained of all color.

I push past him, ignoring the overwhelming urge to smash his face in.

“Jack,” he calls out. “I came here to find you and tell you I’m sorry.”

I stop, let out an unsteady breath, and turn to look at him. “You’re a pathetic piece of shit. I don’t believe you’re sorry. I don’t believe a single fucking thing you’ve ever told me. You lied. You betrayed my trust.”

He runs over to me like he just remembered how to use his legs. “Listen, it was shitty to do that to you. I shouldn’t have let my father say those things, I should have spoken up and told him how I feel about you. ”

“Oh, but you did,” I say. “You were very clear about my baggage and my troubles and how you weren’t going to get in deep. And here’s more of a reason for you to stay away. I’m about to air my dirty laundry to the world at a press conference tomorrow.” I roll my eyes. “So just fuck off. Go crawl back to your whore of a girlfriend. You guys are perfect for each other.”

“I was scared. I was honest about that. You knew I needed to take my time with this.” Carter wrings his hands together. “I panicked.”

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that anymore because off the ice, I don’t want anything to do with you. Keep living in your fucking scared little bubble, miserable and alone.”

I pull my keys out of my pocket and click the alarm on my car.

“Wait,” he says, desperation tingeing his words.

But I can’t listen to another word. My stomach is in knots, and if I don’t get away from him, I’m gonna pummel his ass into the concrete.

“Livvie saw us kissing that day at the arena,” he blurts. “She came to my place today and told me she’s going to leak a video.”

A nasty smile plays at my lips. I twist to see the pained look on his pale face. “Isn’t that poetic justice? You threw me under the bus because you were so afraid about anything damaging your precious reputation, and now your dipshit girl is gonna blow that reputation to hell because you’re linked with the NHL bad boy. Literally. Lip to fucking lip.” I let out a dry chuckle. “Can’t wait to see how that plays out. How’s Daddy gonna feel once that video comes out and he sees his golden boy with his tongue down my throat?”

I shake my head and open the driver’s side door. “If you’re looking for my sympathy, you’re barking up the wrong tree. I gave you everything and you threw it all back in my face. I’ve got nothing left, and nothing is way fucking more than you deserve.”

“Jack, please,” he says, a pleading look in his eyes. “You have to believe that I never wanted to hurt you.”

“I told you. I don’t believe a fucking word you say,” I say through clenched teeth, gripping the door handle so tight, my fingertips numb. “Now back the fuck up and walk away. Don’t look back.” My temples pound, heart shattering with each word I spew. “I know I sure as hell won’t.”