Page 16

SIXTEEN

carter

My heart lodges in my throat, hammering hard, choking me as I wait for Jack to say something…

anything.

He stares at me for the longest minute of my damn life, his dark gaze igniting sparks that make my blood boil.

Water runs over his muscled body, his skin glistening and flushed from the heat.

“You don’t really want this,” he finally says.

“You don’t want me. You’re confused. And I can’t?—”

He starts to push past me but I grab his arm, stopping him before he can get out.

“You can’t what?”

Pushing his wet hair back, he turns his head away, his jaw tight.

“I can’t give you what you need. I’m no good to anyone right now, do you get that?”

Heat rushes up the sides of my neck, my skin pebbled with goosebumps despite the hot spray of water filling the enclosure.

“That’s bullshit,” I say, my voice tight.

“You want to keep me out for some reason. You want to push everyone away. But I know you feel the same things I do. I didn’t imagine those moments. Don’t lie to me and tell me I’m wrong. ”

His jaw tenses.

“Look, if you’re still stuck on what happened between us, just let it go. It was a damn long time ago,” he says, his hardened gaze chilling my insides.

“I made a dumbass mistake and you flipped the fuck out. You know why? Because you’re not gay, Carter. You’ve just got a savior complex, and you think this is gonna fix me. But it won’t. It can’t. Because I’m beyond fixing.”

“I don’t believe that.” My voice catches, and I take a deep breath.

“And it wasn’t a mistake.”

A flicker of pain glimmers in his green eyes.

“I fucked up that night. I ruined everything. And I did shit I can’t undo because…”

His tormented voice trails off and my heart clenches at the remorse seeping into his expression.

“Because?” I whisper, inching toward him.

Jack shakes his head.

“It was wrong, and I knew it. But I had to…I needed?—”

He snaps his lips closed before he can finish his thought.

A shiver slips down my spine, desire flaring in my chest as I creep closer to him.

“I don’t care about the past, Jack. I only care about what’s happening right now. And I want this. I want you.”

“You should go now,” he mutters.

“Just leave before?—”

“I can’t.” I capture him around the waist and pull him close, crushing my lips against his before the rest of his words hit the air.

I dig my fingertips into the slick skin of his back, dragging my fingers down the slope of his spine, my tongue eagerly parting his, delving into his mouth.

Our bodies cling to one another, all frenzied hands and thrashing hearts.

Coiling heat shoots into my veins as we connect on a level I’ve fantasized about for far too long.

He slides one hand over my ass, the other traveling around to the back of my neck.

It gets lost in my hair, tugging and fisting it as our kiss deepens.

He devours me, his hungry lips attacking me like he needs my breath to survive.

Coming back to the room was a risk.

I wasn’t sure what to say to him, how to let him know how I really feel.

When I heard the shower running, I stopped thinking and planning.

I just acted.

And my God, it’s like I’ve been dead all these years, wandering around as an empty shell.

All of a sudden, his demanding touch sparked a surge of life inside me.

Things that were dull are suddenly full of color.

What was dim and dark is now bright.

All of the things I felt the night he kissed me were nothing compared to the pure, carnal need coursing through me now.

There’s no more denying my truth.

Jack is my truth.

And right at this second, there’s no fear, not panic, no worry.

There’s only us.

He pushes me against the back wall of the shower so we’re out of the direct line of spray and presses his hips against me before grabbing both of our cocks in one of his hands.

He jerks us together, rubbing and tugging and taunting to the point where I’m damn close to exploding.

When he pulls his lips from mine, I’m immediately hit by the loss.

Then he trails them down the side of my neck, biting and sucking the sensitive area right above my collarbone…

how did he fucking know?

...before navigating lower and lower as he gets on his knees.

A hiss of air slips through my lips.

His tongue teases my slit, lips clamped around my throbbing cock.

My eyes squeeze shut, hands lost in his hair as he takes me deep, stroking me with his tongue.

He cradles my balls, taking me as far into his mouth as I can go.

The tip of my cock hits the back of his throat, but that only urges him to suck me down harder and faster.

A strangled moan rumbles deep in my chest, erupting as my core tightens and my heart thrashes.

Every cell bursts into flames as the orgasm tears through me.

Jack grips my ass tight as I fill his greedy mouth with everything I have to give, his fingers slicing into me such a delicious fucking pain.

I can’t see anything but flashes of bright white light behind my eyelids.

And everything wobbles and quivers like I’ve been reduced to a bowl of Jell-O.

My chest heaves as I gulp down oxygen after what was, by far, the most powerful and intimate sexual experience of my goddamn life.

And the shock that it was with a man doesn’t even come close to the surge of yearning I feel for said man.

How the fuck can I even say I’ve lived when I’ve been without this?

Without him?

Jack’s mouth works its way back toward mine.

He cups my face in his hands, pressing his forehead against mine.

His heart beats fast and hard, the erratic thrum vibrating in time with my own.

“I want…to fuck you…Jack,” I rasp.

“I need to feel you. I need to feel myself inside of you.”

I run my hands over his broad shoulders and then down over his pecs.

My eyes flick to his inked skin, focused on the raised scars that I didn’t notice earlier.

I gently trace over them, a tightness in my chest as realization washes over me.

It’s almost as if the tattoos were added to mask them.

What the hell happened to him?

My mind stumbles back to the night at junior hockey camp and Kyle Donovan’s jeers about Jack’s broken family.

Is that where these scars came from?

Was he…abused ?

Pain colors Jack’s gaze as if he can see the questions peppering my brain.

“I don’t want you to look at them,” he whispers.

“Just look at me, okay?”

I nod, speechless, his words stealing my breath.

He reaches behind him and shuts off the water, then leads me back into our room.

Naked. Dripping. Fucking horny out of my damn mind.

The room is dark, only a sliver of moonlight peeks in through the curtains.

Jack bends down and reaches for something in his bag.

He tosses it onto the bed and then pulls me onto the mattress.

“I don’t know what to do,” I murmur as his lips capture mine again in a desperate kiss.

“Tell me what you like. What you need.”

Still holding me tight, he places a tube in my hand.

“Use this on your fingers and on your cock.”

“Okay.” I somehow manage to squirt some lube into my hand while my other one is locked around his waist. I slather it on my cock, which is already shockingly rock hard again.

“Use your fingers,” he says, nipping at my lower lip.

A gasp hisses through his teeth when I cautiously slide two fingers into his ass.

“Scissor them to open me up,” he rasps.

He leans back on the mattress, and I straddle him, working his cock with my free hand.

It’s a little weird and I’m trying to keep the momentum going for him, but my brain is foggy with lust, too many sensations coursing through me to think straight.

My pulse almost chokes me as I work my fingers deeper, following his instructions.

He pulls my head toward him, his green eyes glimmering with the same kind of carnal flames that blaze deep inside of me.

Our tongues tangle, teeth cracking as our frenzied mouths feast on one another .

And when he breaks the kiss and stares at me like I’m the center of his world, I don’t need an invitation.

Blood rushes between my ears, my pulse hammering against my throat when I cautiously push inside of him, not knowing what to expect, but letting out a low groan as his muscles tighten and tense around me.

Oh Christ, this is more incredible than I imagined.

I move slow at first, not sure if I’m hurting him, his heat blanketing me more with each deep stroke.

Fuck me, he feels amazing.

And the way he looks right now…

I gaze down at his face, stubbled jaw clenched as I push deeper and harder.

I use my free hand to work his cock as I fuck him long and deep.

I’ve never seen anything so gorgeous.

His ass pulls me deep, squeezing my cock, and I yelp.

“Harder,” Jack grunts, pushing on the small of my back.

His muscular thighs lock me in, his feet digging into the bed.

“Fuck, that’s so good.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Do it,” he grunts, stabbing my ass cheeks deep with his fingertips.

His body quakes. My balls tighten, aching for release.

Again.

All because of him.

The man I’m…

I grit my teeth.

No.

Fucking. The man I’m fucking.

My ears ring, sweat beads exploding along my prickled skin.

I’m not prepared for it, but when it happens, holy shit.

My brain short-circuits, my skin is on fire.

The orgasm charges through me, sizzling every cell in its path as I lose myself in him.

Hot ropes of cum from his cock shoot across my heaving chest, coating us both.

Oh my God.

Did that…

?

Yeah, that just fucking happened.

Suddenly, the ringing gets louder, my lungs tight like they’re being crushed by a vise.

I swallow hard, words escaping me when Jack opens his eyes then narrows them at me when I still don’t speak.

Because I can’t.

My dick slips out of him when I sit back on my knees, trying to calm my breathing and silence the screaming voices in my head.

It’s deafeningly silent in the room, but my mind is a mess of noise that I can’t unhear.

After a minute or two, his expression shifts, hardens, the mask suddenly back in place.

His heated gaze ices over, chilling the blood in my veins.

He sits up, then swings his legs around me to get off the bed.

“And I told you I didn’t need to be saved.” His spine tenses, muscles in his legs tightening as he walks toward the bathroom.

“Consider your good deed done and leave me the fuck alone.”

Then he slams the door shut, the force shattering the photos on the wall as well as my heart. What…the fuck?