Page 11
Story: Pope’s Penance (Saint’s Outlaws MC: Coral Cay Chapter #1)
I don’t know shit about Legend. Not his favorite color, his hobbies, his fucking favorite food.
I know nothing about my son, but I need him to feel at home when he’s here.
Same with Lovelyn. What the fuck did I know about little girls?
Just shit I learned from others when I was asking around about what they liked.
My children and I are fucking strangers to one another. If my heart was still beating, I’m sure it’d break at that fact.
Not wanting the anger to grab hold of me again, I return my attention to Legend. “What do you think, little warrior?”
His head swivels around at my question and he’s unable to hide the delight in his eyes quick enough.
I’m fucking proud when I spot it because while I may have failed as a father before this, I’m winning right now.
Little by little, piece by piece, I will win my son over.
Eventually, he won’t look at me with so much distrust.
Legend lifts a shoulder before letting it fall. “It’s a place to sleep.”
I blow out a breath and turn to Lovelyn. “Right. All right, my little love, ready to check yours out?”
“Can we?” she breathes out, her eyes screaming her excitement.
Goddamn.
Never thought I’d lose that fucking black thing inside my chest to another person again, but there it goes.
As useless, as dusty, as black as it is, it’s theirs.
These three fucking own me, and they don’t even know it.
Lovelyn grabs hold of my hand and pulls me behind her as she marches across the hall. When she steps through the door, she stumbles to a stop. My hand is quickly dropped as she brings both of her tiny fists up to her mouth.
“It’s so pretty,” she whispers in awe.
“Holy crap,” Birdie murmurs.
I lift my chin with pride, happy that I’m still on a roll.
Lovelyn rushes over to her bed and climbs inside the small house I built as a bedframe.
So many hours I spent working on that thing without knowing if it’d ever be used.
White fairy lights hang down from its roof so that the inside has a bright glow.
Through the wooden slats created to appear as windows, she can see the fake cherry tree that Bambi, Giblet’s old lady, made.
When they brought it over, I stood in a stupor because the damn thing looked so real.
It even has two lamps hanging from the branches and some tulle shit around the bottom to mimic grass.
Blitz and Ducky painted the mural on the wall behind it so the entirety of it created the outdoor scene that Lovelyn is now cooing over.
The interior decorator called the greenish color on the wall sea foam or some shit like that, and the floor is maple hardwood.
When I worried about it being too rough for my girl, Coco, Monster’s old lady, went out and bought a rug to match the theme I came up with.
Lovelyn turns back to me and pops her hands on her hips. She looks so much like her mama at this moment, my vision blurs a bit, and I have to bite my lip to keep the tears from falling.
“How did you know pink and green are my favorite colors?” she demands.
Shoving my hands in my pockets, I shrug with a half-smile. “Lucky guess?”
“Huh. That’s a good guess then.”
I tug gently on a lock of her hair. “Guess so.” Birdie is watching us through puffy eyes.
I can’t tell if they’re glossy from her injuries or from what she’s witnessing between me and our kids.
“How about we get Mama in the shower and then I make you all something to eat? What do you say, little mama? Think you can manage in the shower on your own, or do you need me?”
Birdie’s arms wrap around herself as she steps back. “I can do it.”
I roll my eyes, shake my head, and indulge her for now. “You can barely walk on your own, but okay.” I tilt my head toward the door. “Come on. I’ll show you where everything is and get you something to wear for tonight. Lege, take your sister to the kitchen. I’ll be there in a minute.”
He just stands there, and as much as I don’t want to make him angrier at me, he’s got to know there’s only room in here for one alpha right now.
And his mama needs a moment to just breathe without having to be fucking strong.
So, I look down my nose at him and lift a brow.
My teeth clamp onto the inside of my cheek to hide the smile that tries to spread when his top lip curls at the corner.
Oh, that expression is all fucking me.
The little shit would have shoulder checked me on his way out of the room if I hadn’t seen it coming and moved out of the way.
Definitely my kid.
Not wanting to leave the twins on their own for long, I guide Birdie to my bedroom and the connected bathroom. While she checks the space out, I grab a towel from the cabinet and turn on the warmer before tossing the towel across the bar.
“Towel is on the warmer. Sit on the side of the tub while I get the shower ready and get you something to wear.”
With my help, Birdie lowers herself slowly onto the edge of the tub. Once I’m sure she’s not going anywhere, I walk over to the stand-up shower and slide open the glass door. The warm water rains down, quickly filling the stall with steam.
“Be right back.”
There’s still clothes of Birdie’s around here somewhere, but my woman has put on some delicious fucking weight since she’s had my kids, so I’m not sure if they’ll still fit. No matter, though, because having her in my clothes is almost as good as seeing her naked.
Almost .
Nothing could ever truly compare to that.
Knowing she’s got more dips and curves than what she had while we were together . . .
A groan rips from my chest, and I cup the bulge in my jeans to stave off the ache filling my balls.
Fuck, I can’t wait to explore every inch of her again.
With a sigh, I readjust myself before snatching a t-shirt and a pair of sweats from the dresser and heading back to her.
Birdie has managed to slide her sandals from her feet but still sits there as if she’s unsure what else to do.
I place the clothes on the shelf behind the toilet and move to stand in front of her. “Let’s get the jewelry off.”
“N-n-no,” she stammers, reaching up to wrap her fingers around the pearls. “They must never come off.”
Panic builds in what I can see of her eyes, and tremors work through her body. Worried about her state, I hold up my hands and step back.
“Okay, little mama,” I croon. “They can stay on. Let’s get you out of the rest of these clothes then, yeah?”
Her shaking worsens at my words, so I pinch her chin between my fingers and lift her face to mine. “Nothing funny, love. I won’t even drop my eyes, okay? Just want to get you out of these and into the shower. Then I’ll go to the twins.”
“You won’t look?”
“No, baby,” I say softly, “I won’t look.”
She nods, a tear falling down her cheek when she does. “Okay.”
We take our time removing her clothes, and not once do I break my promise to her. My eyes stay on hers the entire time. It’s definitely one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I’m quite proud of myself, really.
Once she’s naked, I brush my lips across her nose before stepping back and turning away.
The sound of her bare feet shuffling against the tile floor let me know she’s working her way into the shower.
“You see that button on the wall just outside the shower stall?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“That’s an intercom that’s wired through the entire house. You just push it and then speak. I’ll hear you wherever I am.”
“Okay.”
“Time to breathe, little mama. Let me take it from here,” I tell her before I walk out of the bathroom.
There’s so much shit between us now that I don’t know if we’ll ever be the Birdie and Apollonos we were seven years ago.
We’ve both been through some shit. We’ve changed.
We’ve fought different battles, yet we carry the same scars.
Where light once shone on us, darkness has made itself a home.
The only thing we can do now is learn how to navigate it blindly and hope we don’t fall off the edge.
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11 (Reading here)
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 49