Page 16

CHAPTER 16

JENNER

Y ou know when people say that if you build something up in your mind, you might as well expect disappointment because nothing will ever live up to your imagination?

Yeah, those assholes were wrong when it came to being with Camden.

She was so fucking much better than I could’ve ever dreamed up.

Best of all, she was still in my bed with her skin flushed and her eyes closed, the smell of caramel vanilla in the air. That was her. It certainly wasn’t my house.

After brushing her hair away from her face, I traced my thumb across her cheekbone. She was on her side looking as satisfied as I’d ever seen a woman. My chest puffed a little more knowing that I’d put that look on her face.

“You asleep?” I asked quietly, though I didn’t think she was.

Her hazel eyes popped open and a small grin appeared as she looked up at me. “No. Not asleep. Actually, I need to use the restroom, but most of my clothes are downstairs.”

I furrowed my brows. “Why would you need clothes?”

Something flashed across her face, but she said, “I’m more comfortable with something on. ”

That statement blew my ever-loving mind. Camden was gorgeous. Absolutely beautiful with curves in all the right places, yet she had an athletic build because of how she’d grown up, though some of that had softened now that she wasn’t playing sports at all. She was also smart as hell and didn’t take shit from people, including her dad, her brothers, and me. She was the strongest woman I knew alongside my own mother.

Instead of getting to the bottom of what she’d said, I hopped out of my bed and grabbed a T-shirt from the drawer. Once I’d handed it over, she dropped it over her head with a “Thank you.” Then she was off to the bathroom.

While she was in there, I pulled on my boxer briefs and grabbed a pair of sweatpants before settling back on the bed to wait for her.

As much as I wanted her to spend the night, I knew there wasn’t a chance that she would. I’d known her a long time and I could put money on that.

The bathroom door opened and she flipped the light off as she came out. But she didn’t crawl back in bed with me as I’d hoped, though I’d predicted she wouldn’t.

“Do you want to explain about the scars?” I asked her as gently as I could. I hadn’t seen them since they’d been wounds in the woods that night and I’d been scared shitless to see them ever since. I just couldn’t let her know that. Honestly, they weren’t bad and I wouldn’t have cared if they were .

Her lips pressed together in a slight grimace as she blinked rapidly. Fuck. I wished I could take all those memories away. Make it so that night never happened. Since I couldn’t do that, maybe I could at least help her get over it.

That night still ran like a nightmare through my mind sometimes, so it had to through hers.

“I just… don’t normally let anyone see them.”

“Why not?”

“They’re ugly.”

“Please.” I scoffed. If anyone saw her naked and even noticed the scars, there was something wrong with him.

“They are. I don’t know.” She let out a sigh. “I’m just self-conscious, all right? Not a big deal.”

That was the sign for me to not push. “I was just curious, but you don’t have to be self-conscious with me.”

She nodded quickly, but I could see the escape in her eyes. She was thinking about how to get out of here.

“Are you good with all of the other decisions you made tonight?” I asked, assuming she’d know what I was talking about.

“The condom?” she asked, so I nodded. “Yeah. I’m fine with it. I assume if there was a chance you were going to give me something, you would’ve insisted and I know I don’t have anything to give you, so I figured, what the hell? One time was worth the risk.”

Her saying one time didn’t sit well in my stomach. Was that her saying we’d only go condom-free one time or that this was a one-time thing ?

The question was on the tip of my tongue, but she slid quickly off my bed and said, “I better go.”

Fuck. That wasn’t what I wanted. I’d expected it though.

She hurried over and pulled her underwear and yoga pants on then went out to the living room with me following behind her. She grabbed her bag, pushed her feet into some shoes, then turned to me with her hand on the doorknob.

“I’m glad you liked the scripts,” she said as if nothing else had happened. “And thanks for… everything else, I guess.” This was the most unsure of herself that I’d ever heard this woman.

She got through the door before I called her name to bring her to a stop. Then I stepped out into the night as well, cupped her face with my hands, and brought our lips together. Her small hand wrapped around my thick wrist as she held on.

If nothing more, she was leaving with a reminder.

I watched until she was in my car and had backed out of my driveway before going inside and locking up.

Tonight hadn’t gone how I’d expected it to, but I was really happy with what had happened.

In fact, as I slept, it was like I could feel her beneath me. Feel her hands on my back, digging her nails in just enough to bite. She didn’t have long claws, so I wouldn’t look like I’d been mauled by a monster from our nightmares.

It made sleeping hard and it would’ve been better if she would’ve stayed in my bed. Better for me, anyway .

In the morning in the shower, I had to use my hand as I thought about her again. It was the only way this granite erection was going to go away. It was almost worse now that I knew exactly how she felt… how she tasted.

Fuck, I wanted her again in every position I could think of.

Actually, I wanted her so much more now that we’d been together. That one time hadn’t satisfied anything. Hell, I hadn’t even been expecting that to happen when I’d kissed her, either.

Maybe it was time to come clean with her. Tell Camden that I’d had feelings for her even before the night she’d told me she’d been in love with me. She’d just been too damn young and Silas had given all of his friends a warning. Maybe I shouldn’t have listened to him then, but I sure as fuck wasn’t going to now.

What a difference a few years could make.

Though I had to be real with myself. If I hadn’t been a clueless kid then, I wouldn’t have listen to Silas then, either, if she wasn’t underage.

Her being too young was the only reason I’d said the things I had to her. They’d been the only things I could come up with to make her hate me enough to stay away. Fuck. I hadn’t known she’d end up getting hurt in the woods.

When I came out, I saw something near the couch and had to get close before it became clear. Camden had left her bra and T-shirt when she’d been scurrying out my door. She’d left in my T-shirt and I wasn’t so sure she realized it .

Now I imagined she’d slept in it all night and I was back to having a problem in my pants.

After grabbing breakfast, I headed to the park for a workout before we started our game day routines. I was in gym clothes when Silas came in, so I waited for him, then we headed to the gym together.

“Don’t you have a gym at home?” I asked him once we’d gotten on the treadmill for a warmup.

“I do, but Amity had to be here, anyway, fuck you very much.”

I laughed because that sounded so much like him. Honestly, I should put a gym in my basement, too

After the treadmill, we moved to some weights.

“What’s wrong with you?” he asked, which had me furrowing my brows.

“Nothing.”

“No.” He set the heavy weight bar down. “There’s something going on. Every once in a while, you get this little smile on your face, like you’re remembering some secret or something.”

I’d been remembering his sister in bed last night, but clearly, I couldn’t say that.

“You’re cracked,” I said instead.

“And I think you smell like sex.”

A loud laugh came out before I could control it. Fuck. I should’ve been more nervous at the idea of Silas finding out that I’d been with his sister last night, but I couldn’t be. Hell, part of me wanted him to guess so he knew and we could deal with his big feelings about it instead of him dealing with Camden .

I would’ve told him right there, but with the way she’d skirted out of my house last night and mentioned the one-time thing, I should talk to her first.

“I promise you don’t want to think I smell like sex. Besides, I showered.” Though I’d lain in the scent of caramel vanilla all night, which hadn’t helped the rock-hard erection I’d been sporting for most of the shower.

“So you did have sex. Is that why you’re being weird?”

“I’m not being weird. You’re being weird.”

“I’d say you’re both probably being weird,” Amity said from somewhere. She was near the door and neither of us had seen her.

I shrugged. “You’re not wrong.”

“What’s up?” Silas asked, going toward her.

Now they were far enough away that I didn’t hear what they said, but he gave her a kiss, being careful not to get his sweatiness all over her. She was dressed for work and didn’t need sweat stains.

“Things are still good, then?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

“The best.”

Now I set the weights I was using back in their cradle and sat on the end of the bench he was on.

“Was it hard to tell her that you felt responsible for her brother’s death?” I asked. This wasn’t something we talked about much, but over the years, I’d been the one trying to convince him that he hadn’t been.

Jayce had come out to get both of us that night. Both of us had been drinking. If either one of us hadn’t been, he wouldn’t have needed to drive us home, there wouldn’t have been an accident, and Amity’s life wouldn’t have been torn apart. Given that her mom had left after her brother’s death, I’d say her live had been turned upside down pretty good.

“You were there for all that last year,” he told me, but I shook my head.

“Not when you talked to her. Was it hard for you to admit to her that you thought it was your fault, knowing that you’d probably lose her? Or at least worrying that you would?”

“Hardest thing in my entire fucking life,” he told me. “I wished I would’ve done it sooner, though. I took her by total surprise, so when she responded, I thought she agreed, but it was that much harder for her to convince me that I wasn’t to blame. It was just an accident.”

“Which is what I told you for years.”

“Right. But you’re my best friend. It’s different.”

Yeah. That much, I knew.

“Wait a minute.” Silas turned my way. “Are you finally thinking of getting into a relationship? Are you finally over the bitch who cheated on you?”

Giving him a scowl, I added a glare and shook my head. What had happened in high school was the last thing on my mind.

Sure, at first, I’d fucked around because I could and it had dulled the pain. But I wasn’t still butthurt over something that had happened seven years ago. Not to mention I’d realized soon after that I’d loved my high school girlfriend the only way I’d known how to love someone at that age. But I knew now that loving someone as a man was totally different and there was only one woman I had those kinds of feelings for.

And it was the last person Silas would want to hear about.

Yet I had actually been responsible for Camden’s accident, whereas Silas hadn’t been for Jayce’s. I was the reason she hated and didn’t trust baseball players. It was me. Though I didn’t mind that part if it kept her away from other baseball players. Her opinions weren’t totally wrong. The wrong part was that it didn’t apply to all of us.

When I picked the weights back up, I decided right then and there that talking to her might not be enough. I had to show her that I wasn’t what she thought I was. That last night didn’t have to be a one-time thing.

Fuck. I didn’t think I could stand it if it was a one-time thing.

She was a grown woman now. Grown enough for me to want the things that I wanted. A relationship. Her to be mine. Me to be hers. That was clearly what I wanted, given that I was lifting weights next to her brother with a slight hard-on just from thinking about her.

We were meeting tomorrow night to record the social media spots at the youth center. Then she agreed to go to dinner with me. That was before I’d gotten her naked, but hopefully, she’d keep to the agreement.

If not, I’d have to pivot, but I had to be able to tell her about that night and that I wanted her now.

Hopefully without her punching me in the throat.