Page 22
CHAPTER 21
T RINA
I squeeze my eyes shut and suck in a deep breath. After all, I’m supposed to be giving this marriage a chance, so strangling my husband here on the sidewalk in front of his brother and soon to be sister-in-law’s house is probably not the best way to end this argument.
It’s early June, and it’s humid out, which is making me more irritable by the moment. As I open my eyes, I glance over at Ben’s partner, Rachel. I wonder whether she has any social skills at all, since it seems she doesn’t realize that standing four feet away from Ben and me while we’re arguing is annoying.
I force myself to smile at her. “Could you please give us a minute?”
Rachel just cocks her head and rolls her eyes at me. “You know I don’t want to be doing this either, right?”
I’m not sure she could sound any bitchier if she tried.
“Then why are you?” I toss the words at her, throwing her the worst glare I can muster.
“For him. Not you. You could show a little gratitude.”
“And you can shove your?—”
“Okay, okay,” Ben interrupts and we both turn to look at him. But he isn’t looking at me, he’s looking at her. I don’t like that at all.
“Rach, please?” His voice is calm with her, even though he and I were just pretty heated with each other.
She looks at Ben. “Fine,” she says with a huff and walks away, taking a seat on Annie and Jack’s front porch.
“Trina—”
“I don’t need an escort to a bachelorette party, Ben. Especially not ‘Rach.’ I’ll be with more than a half dozen other women and the party bus driver. What do you think is going to happen?”
“For fuck’s sake. You. Have. A. Stalker.” Ben has the gall to hold his hands up in front of him and chop at the air with each word like I won’t get it otherwise.
I step closer to him. “Yet, you’re the one. Acting. Like. A. Lunatic.” To make my point, I jab my finger at his chest with each of my words since he started it.
This man makes me lose my control and act like I normally wouldn’t—in this case, childish.
Ben grabs a fistful of his hair and growls before turning and taking a few steps away from me. He stands there for several long seconds before turning back to face me.
I narrow my eyes at him, my arms folded across my chest, and basically dare him to tell me again that I ‘can’t’ go with my friends without his partner accompanying us.
Just when Ben opens his mouth, Janie, Annie’s best friend and maid of honor, yells to me from over at the party bus.
“Let’s go. We’re gonna be late to our first stop if you continue this lovers’ quarrel.” I swivel my head to give her my most intimidating leer and she just shouts back. “You don’t scare me, Trina. Move it.”
“I’ve got to go.” I take a step to move toward the rest of our group and Ben grabs my wrist, stopping me.
He leans in close to me. “I have half a mind to find somewhere private and fuck this stubbornness out of you until you quit fighting with me. But that wouldn’t help us in the long run. Instead, I’m gonna try honesty and communicate my feelings here because I want this—you and me—to work and sex can’t be the answer to everything. So, here goes… I’m worried. The idea of you being out at multiple bars tonight, drinking alcohol and maybe something happening to you terrifies me. I’ll lose my mind, Trina. I know you can handle yourself, but I need you to do this. For my peace of mind, please.”
Well shit. That makes it a little harder to keep pushing against Rachel coming with us.
I watch his face, and he stares back at me, waiting for my response.
On a deep sigh, I give in, more affected by his words than I like to admit. “Fine. But just so you know, I don’t like her.”
A light chuckle escapes from Ben. “Rach is a great person. I think if you give her a chance, you’ll like?—”
“She wants to have sex with you. So, no, I won’t like her.”
Ben’s eyes widen and a huge grin spreads across his face. Then he laughs at me. Actually laughs at me.
“I can promise you she doesn’t want to have sex with me. If you don’t believe me, you can ask her wife.”
Why is he so damn sexy with that arrogant smirk he’s wearing at my expense?
“I really have to go.” I lean slightly toward him, planning a quick kiss goodbye until I come back to my senses and remember no one else knows about us. Ben’s eyes light up when it hits him I was coming in for a kiss.
“Okay. Thank you for agreeing to let Rachel come. And, for the record, I wanted to kiss you goodbye, too.”
My cheeks heat and my heart flutters for a few beats at his words. I smile at him. “I’ll see you tonight.”
I turn and walk to the bus, waving Rachel along without even looking at her. I’m still irritated as hell she’s coming, but it’s obviously what Ben needs for him to relax tonight and celebrate his brother along with all their friends.
I practically stomp onto the bus, and the tightness in my jaw tells me I probably look just as annoyed as I feel. I stop a few feet in and gesture to Rachel.
“Everyone, this is Rachel. She’s an off-duty police officer. Because apparently Ben Donley is bossy as shit and thinks we need a protective detail tonight.”
Rachel just nods her head and gives a half wave to everyone before she sits down.
I pull out my phone and type out a snarky text to Ben, telling him that in the future, he needs to talk to me about these kinds of things before he springs them on me as a surprise—an unpleasant one.
He at least has the decency to reply and apologize for that part.
A throat clears near me, and I look up to find Emily eyeing me warily.
“Tri? This is weird. What’s going on? First, you show up at my house with Ben. Now he shows up here with a police escort for us.”
“Yeah, and Finn said there are some additional security measures being taken at the fire station,” Shayna chimes in.
I huff. This isn’t a conversation I want to have yet—hell, maybe ever if we catch the person. I certainly don’t want to have it on a party bus headed out bar hopping. But Rachel’s presence has forced my hand.
“Don’t freak out,” I warn. I don’t continue yet. I need Emily to promise she’ll stay calm first.
“Um, okay. But telling me not to freak out is exactly the kind of thing that makes me think you’re gonna tell me something I should freak out about.”
That’s probably the best I’m getting from her. “It’s nothing, really. Just some weirdo who I must have run into on a call or something and now he’s acting a little obsessed.”
“What? You have a stalker?” Shayna hisses.
I sigh. “I do not have a stalker. More like a secret admirer.”
Rachel snorts from her seat and I shoot her a dirty look, even if it’s directed at the back of her head. It’s the thought that counts.
“Okay, fine. Whoever it is has gotten a bit more… aggressive and explicit in the messages they’ve been sending. So, Ben is working the case and just trying to do one more thing to irritate me, as per usual.” As an afterthought, I look over at Shayna. “No offense. I know he’s your brother.”
“None taken. Both my brothers can be annoying.”
“Hey. One of those brothers is my fiancé,” Annie protests.
“Excuse me!” Emily shouts. It draws everyone’s attention. “Can we please get back to the part where my sister said she has an ‘aggressive and explicit’ creeper after her, to where Ben is worried enough to send a police officer with us?”
The fear in her voice is palpable, and I want to make it better for her. I don’t need Emily worrying about me after the year she’s had.
“This is exactly why I told him Rachel shouldn’t come. It would just make everyone nervous. Em, I promise you I’m fine. I’m being safe and I’m sure the guy is some harmless weirdo living in his mom’s basement and he’ll never actually seek me out. Now, please, can we just enjoy the night?”
“But, what if?—”
“Emily. Please. I need this night out without thinking about that or anything else except having a good time. Okay? I’m being careful. I promise.” The fatigue in my voice is obvious..
My sister peers at my face, likely searching for any sign that I’m not being honest. Finally, she agrees, but her face is no longer relaxed and jovial like it was before I had to tell her.
It’s going to be a long night, so when Janie comes around with cinnamon whiskey shots, I request—and she obliges—a double.
* * *
BEN
As I drive home, I think about Trina and how she appears to be all hard-edged to people who don’t know her well. Yet she’s one of the most caring, compassionate, loyal people I know. She strives for control in her life, not liking the unpredictable, but if she cares enough to let you close, she’ll do anything for you. Tonight, I realized I’m becoming one of those people she cares about.
Did I want to be vulnerable with her and tell her I’m afraid about her situation? No, my ego wants her to think I’m always strong and unfazed by whatever comes my way. But me not sharing how I felt about things a decade ago led us down a painful path and cost us years together. So, my ego can fuck off because I love Trina Flynn. I have for years, and I’ll be damned if I let my wounded pride or a bruised ego convince me to act like a child and not communicate like an adult with her this time around.
I get back to my house in plenty of time to put the final touches on our bachelor party for Jack. He wanted something low-key, so we settled on a poker night on my back deck with my dad, brothers-in-law, and Fitz and Finn. Within thirty-minutes, people arrive, and we sit outside in the warm summer air, eating the dinner my mom and I prepared—Jack’s favorite, lasagna—as the main course.
Over the course of the next few hours, periodic text messages from Rachel come through, assuring me nothing exciting—stalker wise—is happening. Apparently, Janie has some party game seeing who can get the most phone numbers by the end of the night and several of the women are getting pretty competitive about it.
Me: Who’s winning?
Rachel: Is that your way of asking if Trina is getting a lot of numbers?
Shit, am I that obvious? She looked smoking hot earlier in a short dress that only came to mid-thigh. It wasn’t sexy in and of itself, but on her it was fucking amazing. Especially in the beige heeled sandals she wore that had just a few tiny straps holding them onto her feet. Between the shoes and the bottom of the dress, her legs looked killer.
Me: Shit, it’s her, isn’t it?
Rachel: Lol. No, but it would be if she was playing. She and Shayna have had lots of men approach them, but both might as well be wearing flashing neon signs that read, “fuck off.”
It’s immature of me, but I enjoy hearing that about Trina.
Over the next few hours, we play poker and, as we get closer to midnight, my dad and brothers-in-law leave. It’s just Finn, Jack, Fitz, and me left. We sit around the poker table for one last game.
When I fold, I’m actually glad to be out of the game. I glance down at my phone, at the text chain I’ve had with Trina tonight. It starts out with her initial text after she first got on the party bus, followed by another one about forty-five minutes later telling me she loved Annie, but would rather be home watching Bridgerton . After that, it became progressively clearer that Trina was drinking more than her usual. Half her texts made little sense, and her words were so badly misspelled it was like I was doing the daily jumble with each message.
So, when midnight strikes, and we hear hushed laughter from the walkway on the side of my house, it’s no surprise when a gaggle of drunk women come around the corner, completely failing to catch us off guard. Besides, I knew they were coming. Rachel had given me a heads up. She was on her way home and the party bus was on the way to my house.
Trina rushes right past me, calling out, “I gotta pee so bad!” She practically runs to my back door and enters the house. I give her about a minute head start before I follow.
I wait for her in the living room and when she comes out, her cheeks are flushed, and she’s smiling, looking more relaxed than I’ve seen her in quite some time. Except during sex. That’s the one other time she seems to let go of the tight control she keeps on her life. I just wish it would last.
“Hello,” she says coyly, sauntering toward me. She leans in for a kiss and I give it to her but, after a few seconds, I pull back. The alcohol may cause her to let her guard down, but I know she doesn’t want anyone finding out about us yet and the chances of someone else walking in to use the bathroom and seeing us kissing are pretty high.
A frown flits across her face for a second, but pouty lips that I can’t take my eyes off quickly replace it. “Don’t you want to kiss me?”
“You don’t know how much I fucking want to kiss you right now. And more. But our friends are here, and they might walk in.”
She wraps her hands around my neck, and I splay mine over her hips. When she rests her head on my shoulders and releases a satisfied sigh, I’m thrilled. Trina may still have her reservations about us, but this tells me she’s at least trusting me some.
“Can you make everyone go home? I want to go to bed.” Her mouth is so close to my neck that I feel her warm breath against my skin, and it makes me shudder.
“I’ll try. Why don’t you relax for a few minutes, and I’ll go take care of things. Okay?”
“Mm hmm,” she mutters against my shoulder. Fatigue seems to take over and I guide her to the couch, assuming she’ll fall asleep by the time I get back from sending everyone packing.
I head outside and talk with the rest of the guys to make sure all the women have a ride home. Jack will drop off Janie before he and Annie head home and Finn obviously plans on getting Shayna home, seeing as how they can’t keep their hands off each other. Fitz volunteers to get Emily home and he’ll have his hands full as she’s completely toasted. No one bats an eye when I let them know I’ll make sure Trina is safe—it’s pretty much all hands on deck.
Before I know it, everyone is gone for the night. Everyone but Trina.
When I get back in the house, I lock the door and go to get Trina from the couch, but she’s not there. I walk through each room looking for her and when I find her, she’s in my bedroom, sitting on the side of my bed.
She’s also wearing nothing but thin black panties and one of my Elladine Police Department T-shirts. Damn, she looks good in my clothes.
“I thought you wanted to go home and get to bed?” I ask, confused.
“I never said I wanted to go home to get in bed. I just wanted to get to bed… here.”She pats my mattress.
My heart rate picks up in my chest. She’s never been willing to stay at my house, so this feels big to me.
“Okay. We can do that. Why don’t you get under the covers, and I’ll go get us some water and get you some headache pills, so you feel okay in the morning.”
“’Kay.” She immediately crawls under the covers.
A few minutes later, I’ve gotten the water, brushed my teeth, and head back into the bedroom where Trina appears to be sleeping with her back turned to me. Her breathing is rhythmic and slow, and I just stand and watch her for a few moments, loving how she looks in my personal space. Like she belongs here.
I gingerly climb into bed, trying not to wake her. I lie on my back, my hands resting behind my head. I close my eyes and attempt to fall asleep when rustling, followed by Trina cozying up to my body and lying her head on my chest, interrupts my efforts. She casually tosses an arm and a leg over me. Well, damn, I like how this feels.
“Ben?” she whispers.
“Yeah?” I lean my head forward and place a tender kiss on hers.
“Will you tell me more of the things?”
“What things?”
“Things I like. Or don’t like. Things you remember about me.”
My heart skips a beat. She likes I remember so much about her. That I know her.
I pull my left hand out from under my head and wrap it around her, securing her close to me.
“Sure. Let’s see… I remember that fall is your favorite season and Halloween is your favorite holiday.”
“Mmm, that’s right. More… please.”
I chuckle. It’s obvious she’s trying to say please more often. “Cherries are your favorite fruit, and you love steak, but you struggle to eat chicken.”
“That’s true. I like you remember things about me,” she whispers. “That you didn’t forget me.”
Keeping my left hand firmly around her, I bring my right hand to her head and stroke her hair. “I never forgot you, Trina. I know you’ll probably not remember this tomorrow, but there wasn’t a day that we spent apart that I didn’t think about you. Not a single day.”
More awake now, Trina lifts her head off my shoulder and looks at me. “Do you want to know a secret?”
Her face looks so serious that I can’t help but chuckle a little.
“Sure, if you want to tell me.”
“I didn’t forget you either. I wanted to hate you, but I never did.” Her words make my chest fill with happiness, my heart race with hope. “Actually, I like you. I like you a lot.”
My vision blurs a little with the moisture building behind my eyes. Those words are words of healing and hope.
Because if my wife ‘likes me a lot,’ maybe she could love me.
Table of Contents
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- Page 22 (Reading here)
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