Page 5 of On a Midnight Clear

The sun was not far from setting when they reached the Duran farm.

Angel was weary from the long train trip and then wagon ride.

The day had seemed endless , and now all she really wanted was to take a long soaking bath and go to bed.

However , that didn’t appear possible. She was the mother and wife now and would need to prepare an evening meal and see to the needs of her family.

“Let me show you around,” Vincent said, helping her down. “You children take the supplies into the kitchen, and I’ll get Angel’s trunk when I’m done showing her the farm. Benjamin, you’d also better light a few lamps. Oh, and make a fire in the stove and get several buckets of water for bathing.”

The children said nothing but started doing as their father had instructed. Vincent took Angel by the arm and guided her toward the barn.

“You can see we have a large chicken coop and fenced-in yard over there.” He pointed to the left, where a dozen or so chickens pecked at the dried grass.

“We have a couple of milk cows. They’ll have to be brought in and milked.

Benjamin usually takes care of that these days, but I may need you to take over.

Oh, and there’s a donkey. She wanders with the sheep and guards them.

Your pa taught me the value of a good donkey or two. ”

“They are great guardians. So what size is your flock?”

“I have about a hundred twenty sheep in all. Not a lot by most standards. When Elsa died, I sold off a large number. Almost sold them all.” He looked away. “I really haven’t known what to do. The children require so much time and attention, and so does the farm.”

“Well, that’s why I’m here.” Angel touched his arm.

“Look, Vincent, we know each other well enough to make this work. This is a marriage of convenience, and who knows, maybe in time it will be something more. For now, however, it’s a working arrangement.

I’ll take care of the house and children, milk your cows, and take care of the chickens.

Whatever you need me to do, I’ll do, and that way you can work on rebuilding the flock and deciding what you want to do with the farm.

Now, what arrangements do you want regarding you and me? ”

Vincent looked at her oddly for a moment, then broke into a smile. “You always were one to just say what you thought.”

“I don’t see any reason to do otherwise.

I know you don’t love me, at least not as a husband should.

I don’t love you either, but I hope to in time.

Still, I know that’s probably not uppermost on your mind.

You found and married the love of your life, and then lost her.

You’re going to mourn her and the children you lost for a long time.

“We don’t have to share a bed or our thoughts, if that will help you to move on with your life.

You know my situation. Granny told me she’d explained.

I was left at the altar by a man who I thought loved me.

Now I see that wasn’t true, and frankly, I don’t expect to ever be loved.

” She shrugged. “That isn’t me feeling sorry for myself, but I am twenty-eight and long in the tooth for being a bride.

However, I’ll be faithful and treat you with love and respect.

You and I have a long history, Vincent. I’ve cared about you for most of my life.

You were a close friend years ago, and hopefully you’ll go on being that now. ”

“I want to be. I’m sorry for the situation otherwise. I don’t know that I’ll ever love again. If not for the children, I certainly wouldn’t have gone looking for another wife.”

“Thank you for your honesty. I think as long as we continue to be straightforward about this, we can at least have a peaceful household. It might help me if you were to tell me what kinds of things you all enjoy eating and how you prefer to have the house kept and your laundry done.”

“We’re not going to be fussy about anything, Angel.

I’m just grateful to have someone to work alongside.

We’ve got a good friendship—or at least we have the foundation of one, like you said.

It has been a very long time since we were around each other, and no doubt there have been a lot of changes besides you growing into such an attractive woman. ”

“Thank you for the compliment. Ten years have made you even more handsome than you were when last I saw you.” She laughed. “Of course, I always thought you were a handsome fellow.”

He chuckled. “You used to fancy yourself in love with me, as I recall.”

“I did. I thought I had a chance to woo you, but then Elsa caught your eye and heart, and that was that. But, Vincent, I’m glad you had that even for a short time.

I’ll never know that feeling of belonging and being cherished.

Treasure it forever.” She turned away and pointed to the two-story house.

“Now that that’s behind us, I want to say I’m more than a little impressed with the house you built here. Look at all those windows.”

Vincent said nothing for a few moments, and when Angel looked back at him, he looked sad.

She hoped her talk about Elsa hadn’t caused him too much pain.

It was important to state her feelings on the matter and let him know that it was all right for him to feel as he did.

She didn’t want him to think she’d come here for some great romance.

“When we came out here,” he finally began, “Elsa’s brother Zed came with us, as you know.

He got thrown from a horse and killed shortly after we arrived.

It was devastating to both of us. Then a letter came with a check.

Zed had bought life insurance, and Elsa was his beneficiary.

We had plenty of money to make up for what we’d spent on burying him and enough left over to build this house and a few pens. It was like a memorial to him.”

“It’s beautiful and unexpected.”

“The reason for all the windows was Elsa. She loved the light and told me she didn’t care what else the house had to offer, but she wanted a lot of windows. So despite the expense of glass, every room got a window. Some got two.”

“I’m glad. I love the light as well. What about keeping out the cold?”

“As you can see, there are shutters for each window. They’re very efficient and help a great deal with the cold.

It’s plenty windy around here, too, and can come up a storm without warning.

They help with that as well. You just raise the window and can lean out to pull them closed. I’ll show you later.”

“Anything else I should know about the house?”

“There’s one fireplace to heat the house.

The upstairs is one big room for the time being, and the children sleep up there.

I keep thinking I might put in a stove upstairs, but usually if I build up a fire downstairs, the house stays warm enough.

Elsa and I always had plans to build walls and make several rooms. Our bedroom .

.. well, yours now, is downstairs off the front room. ”

“I can’t kick you out of your bedroom. What if I put down a bedroll or make a pallet somewhere?”

“No. I won’t do that to you. There’s a small room off the birthing shed.

I’ll set myself up there. I promise you, I’ll be quite comfortable.

I often sleep there during lambing season.

There’s even a stove in the room, so I’ll keep plenty warm.

I haven’t used the bedroom much since Elsa died there.

” His frown deepened. “That won’t make you too uneasy, will it?

I hadn’t honestly thought of how it might be for you. ”

Angel shook her head. He was still most considerate. “It’s fine. I’ll be all right. But if I don’t get in there and start working on supper, we won’t be eating until midnight.” She forced a smile. “I was thinking we might have some canned chicken, and I’ll make dumplings. Will that be all right?”

He nodded. “Sounds wonderful.”

Throughout the evening, Vincent thought of Angel’s talk earlier.

She had given up on ever being loved or truly cared about.

She had married a man who had also given up on love.

They were quite the pair. Still, as she had pointed out, Vincent had at least known that kind of love and passion.

There was a dull ache in his heart at the memory of Elsa and how much he had adored her.

Their love had been one for the ages, Granny had once told him.

And now it was gone, and he had let go of the hope of ever feeling that way again.

Angel had given up on it, too, and for some reason that made Vincent sadder than he’d expected.

He knew even when they exchanged their vows that he had little to give her in the way of love.

He cared about her as the little sister of his dear friends.

He could honestly say that he even had a type of love for her.

Spending the evening with her had even afforded him a great deal of cheer.

Something he’d definitely not anticipated.

“Well, the dishes are done,” she said, coming into the front room where he sat by the fire, reading the newspaper. The children followed after her.

“I don’t like drying dishes,” Benjamin said, plopping down in front of the fireplace.

Ava came to her father. She looked at him longingly for a moment and then moved away to sit on the sofa. Angel headed for the rocking chair opposite his cushioned ladder-back chair.

“No!” Benjamin cried out, jumping to his feet. “That’s my mama’s chair. You can’t sit there!”

“Benjamin!” Vincent looked at his son.

The boy scowled. “That’s Mama’s chair.”

“It’s all right,” Angel said, smiling. She went to sit on the sofa opposite Ava. “I can sit here.”

“Benjamin, I know it’s been a busy day, but that’s no reason to be without manners. If Angel wants to sit in the rocker, that’s entirely her choice.”

“Actually,” Angel countered, “I was wondering if the children would want the rocker upstairs with them. It might make them feel closer to their mother.”

“Yes!” Benjamin went to the chair and took hold of it possessively. “Let’s put it upstairs.”

Vincent knew he could make a point with Benjamin about how the chair was just a chair. But in a way, he completely understood the boy’s discomfort. Angel had a presence about her that seemed to fill the room.

He got up and put the newspaper aside. “Very well. I’ll take it up, and you children tell Angel good night. It’s bedtime.”

“Night,” Benjamin muttered and hurried from the room to lead the way.

Ava scooted off the sofa and looked at Angel. “Good night, Angel. I like your name.”

Angel smiled. “I like your name, too, Ava.”

Ava dashed from the room to the stairs as Vincent came and got the rocker. “I’m sorry about the way Benjamin acted. He’s had a real hard time of it.”

“Of course he has. His mother and brother died, not to mention the expected baby. You have a right to be grieving.”

Vincent looked at her for a long moment. She offered no condemnation or ill temper regarding the matter. He supposed he should be grateful for God sending her into their lives. They needed her.

“Thanks.” He picked up the chair and headed upstairs.

The children were already in their beds when he reached the top step. He placed the chair at the foot of Benjamin’s bed and then stood back.

“I know this isn’t easy. It’s not what any of us wanted, but Angel’s kind, and we will treat her the way the Good Lord would have us treat all people.”

“He’s not good,” Benjamin replied, crossing his arms against his chest. “If God was good, He wouldn’t have taken my mama and my brother and the baby.”

Ava sat up, nodding. “God is mean.”

Vincent wanted to offer correction, but in truth he bore some of the same feelings. He didn’t understand either why God had been so cruel.

“God had His reasons for what He allowed. He is a loving Father, and while it’s hard to trust Him sometimes, that’s what we have to do.

We can put our hope in Him or the devil.

I still prefer God, and you should too. The devil doesn’t care one whit for us.

Now, get to sleep. Morning will come soon enough.

I’ll be out in the birthing shed, and Angel will take my room. ”

“You could sleep up here with us,” Ava offered.

He shook his head. “Might have to do that come winter, but not right now.” He went to Ava and motioned her to lie down. He pulled up the covers and looked back at Benjamin.

“Say your prayers and go to sleep. There will be plenty to do come morning.”

Without another word, he blew out the lamp, then headed for the stairs. There had been a time when he might have offered them a hug and kiss, but since their mother’s passing, Vincent hadn’t had it in him to offer anyone love. How in the world was it going to ever work with a new wife?

But Angel didn’t expect love. At least there was that.

The only problem was, Vincent felt she more than deserved it.

He remembered the carefree, happy child she’d been.

Then her mother had died, and it changed everything.

It had changed everything for his children as well.

Still, somehow Angel had managed to come through the situation with her spirit of joy intact.

Maybe she could help his children to do likewise.

Maybe he might even find peace of heart and happiness again.

But was that even possible without love?