Page 10 of On a Midnight Clear

Angel awoke to find herself warm and wrapped tightly in the blanket. As the fog cleared her senses , she realized it wasn’t just the blanket that held her. She was in Vincent’s muscular embrace. For a moment , she didn’t move. She scarcely dared to breathe.

The rhythmic rising and falling of his chest told her he was still asleep.

She had no idea if he was a light or heavy sleeper, but she hoped it was the latter.

She knew she had to disengage herself from his arms and get out of bed without disturbing him.

The problem was the bed was against the wall, and there was a dresser at the foot that wouldn’t allow for her to go out that way.

She would have to climb over Vincent, and that wasn’t going to be easy.

She decided to test the situation and slowly sat up.

He did nothing, and for a moment all Angel did was watch him sleep.

She felt a strange sense of something that she didn’t understand.

She longed to go back into his arms and close her eyes again.

She was comfortable there, safe and protected.

Happy. She studied his face and found every appealing feature, taking her back in time to those days when she’d fancied herself in love.

He was very fine-looking, and she found herself wondering what it would be like to kiss his lips.

Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. This was dangerous territory. She was starting to have feelings for him. Feelings that she knew he couldn’t return. At least not yet.

Oh , Lord , help me.

She pushed down the cover and did her best to tuck it in around him.

Maybe this would help him to go on sleeping.

Angel glanced toward the small window. There was just enough light to see by.

She’d left her clothes hanging on a peg by the door.

If she could manage to get out of the bed and get to them before Vincent woke up, they’d be better off.

Scooting down a little more, Angel maneuvered her nightgown to be modest, yet give her room to move. She positioned her leg across Vincent’s and pushed off. She intended to throw herself over Vincent and off the bed in one quick motion.

But that didn’t work. Her legs were somehow bound in the nightgown, and she started to fall over the side headfirst. This wasn’t going to be good at all. She had visions of landing on her face.

Instead, she found an ironclad grip on her arm pulling her back until she was face to face with Vincent. He seemed momentarily surprised to find her there, but then recognition dawned.

Angel gazed into his eyes, feeling his arms around her. She swallowed the lump in her throat, unable to speak.

Thankfully, Vincent came fully awake. His hands went to her waist and with one powerful lift moved her to the side where Angel quickly jumped out of the bed.

She raced to claim her clothes and then stood holding them against her body, uncertain what to do next.

She could hardly leave the room. The stairs led directly into the dining room below.

“I ... ah ... oh goodness, this is embarrassing.”

Vincent was already grabbing his trousers from the floor. He managed to pull them on under the covers and then reached for his shirt. Angel looked away as he got out of the bed.

“I’m sorry about that, Angel. I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

“You didn’t.” She stared at the wall, still clutching her things close.

“Well, you did, but...” She fell silent, shaking her head.

The situation got the best of her, and she started to giggle.

“I’m the one ... I was trying to keep from waking you up.

” The giggling turned to laughter. “I thought I could sort of jump over you.” She looked at him, and that was her undoing.

She gasped for air as her laughter spilled out around them.

“I ... my legs got caught up ... I started to fall and ... well then...” She could barely breathe for laughing so hard.

The images that went through her mind were almost more than she could stand.

She knew if he hadn’t caught her, she probably would have been thoroughly humiliated.

Vincent chuckled and shook his head. “You sure know how to wake a fellow.”

She had started to calm down, but this only stirred her amusement again. “You looked pretty shocked.” She forced herself to take in deep gulps of air. “I’m so sorry.”

“I didn’t say it was a bad way to wake up. Although I did think you were falling.”

“I was, and believe me, I’m glad you caught me. It would have been pretty embarrassing otherwise.” She let out her breath and steadied her nerves. “I suppose I’ve probably awakened the whole house with my laughter.”

“Better than with your tears.” He started doing up the buttons on his shirt. “I’ll get out of here in a minute so you can dress.”

He finished with the shirt and grabbed his boots. He pulled them on quickly, and then without slowing down, he headed for the door where Angel stood. He paused for a moment and looked down at her. Angel couldn’t help but meet his gaze.

“I have a feeling we’re going to remember this moment for the rest of our lives.” His voice was barely a whisper.

Angel found it impossible to speak. She was fixed once again on his lips and knew she had gotten herself in a terrible bind. She was falling in love with her husband.

After breakfast, Myra led Angel to a small room, where she pointed to a writing desk. “I heard Vincent say something about you wanting to send a letter to his grandmother.”

“Yes. I thought since we probably wouldn’t be back in town for a while, we should drop her a letter. We had one from her recently, and I’ve yet to answer it.”

“I have plenty of paper and envelopes in the drawer. I could post it for you on Monday since you plan to head home after church.”

Angel found the woman’s offer to be too good to pass up. “Thank you so much. I’ll do that.”

“There is a pen and ink on the desk. I’ll leave you to it.” Myra exited the room without another word.

Angel went to the desk and found what she needed. She wrote to Granny, thanking her for the news from home. Her father had been down with a bad cold, but Angel was relieved to hear he was on the mend.

I’m so glad to hear that everyone else is well.

I know Ruth will see Papa nursed back to health.

We are doing well here. The sheep are a good lot—healthy and strong.

And all of the ewes are expecting. There’s some concern that the coming months will be harsh.

Vincent says he’s never known anything quite like winter out here.

I must say I’m anxious to experience my first Wyoming winter.

She told Granny about the children and their accomplishments, then found herself speaking of her own loneliness.

While Ava seems to accept me more and more each day, Benjamin and Vincent have little to do with me.

I can’t help but admit to you alone that I’m lonely sometimes to the point of heartache.

I expected to feel isolated. After all, the closest farm to ours is still about a thirty-minute ride by horse, and the woman there is around fifty years old with two grown sons who work the farm with their father.

But having no friends, and especially not having you around, has been so hard.

I suppose I do speak more to the Lord, but it would be so nice to have someone to talk to.

She thought for a moment of telling Granny about her growing feelings for Vincent.

But how could she possibly explain what she was experiencing?

Angel couldn’t understand them herself. She knew that Vincent was still mourning Elsa.

Their marriage had been a good one, and their friendship and love ran strong.

Even in his need for help with the farm and children, Vincent wasn’t going to overcome that easily.

And Angel wasn’t about to ask him to forget Elsa.

She didn’t think that would be fair to the children.

They should remember their mother, even if she took over that woman’s responsibilities.

Angel had never come with the thought of replacing Elsa.

She concluded the letter with messages to her father and then signed off with love for all. Noting the time, Angel quickly addressed an envelope, then started to fold the letter.

“Myra said you were writing a letter to Granny. Is there room for a postscript?” Vincent asked. “She won’t like it if I don’t at least scrawl a few lines.”

“Of course. You can use the backside if you like or take another piece of paper. Myra said there is plenty. I’ll go make sure Ava’s hair is fixed for church. Would you seal up the letter when you’re done? I’ve already addressed the envelope.”

“Sure thing.”

Vincent was acutely aware of Angel’s every move.

Since their encounter that morning, he couldn’t stop thinking about how she had felt in his arms and the way her wavy blond hair fell around her like a cloak.

In fact, he hadn’t really thought of Elsa until now.

He waited for a feeling of guilt to wash over him, but it never came.

When he’d first married Angel, he had worried that he was somehow betraying his wife’s memory.

Even in needing someone to help with the children and farm, he couldn’t help but feel that he’d done Elsa wrong.

Of course, he hadn’t. She was gone and in a better place. He knew she’d want him to be happy, and the children too. Even as she lay dying, Elsa had urged him to remarry and do so quickly.

He took up Angel’s letter and started to turn it over when his gaze fell upon her words.

I can’t help but admit to you—and you alone—that I’m lonely sometimes to the point of heartache.