Page 30 of Nevermore (A Cruel Love #1)

TWENTY-EIGHT

SANTIAGO

“What do you think about kids?”

Reign turns his head, the dark water dipping past his cheek, and furrows his brows. “What about them?”

I hate to break the quiet reverie we’ve found ourselves in tonight, but I’m simply too curious. Granted, we’ve been at my old school’s pool long enough to relax, but now I’m antsy. I don’t get antsy. Per usual, Reign is fucking up everything I know about myself.

Love will do that.

I flip so I can swim closer to him and place my hands under his back. Puckering his lips, I lean in for a kiss before continuing. “How many do you want?”

“You wanna talk about kids?” he questions. “Aren’t we too young?”

I shrug and, unable to help myself, start pressing kisses to his sun-kissed shoulder. “Just answer the question.”

“Two,” he says too quickly. When I snort, he narrows his eyes. “What? What’s wrong with two?”

“Nothing. Apparently we aren’t too young to think about it.”

“Oh, fuck off,” he snaps, playfully trying to push me away. This only ends with me twisting and pulling him until his legs are wrapped around my waist and my lips are on his. “So, we’re doin’ this then instead?”

As much as I want to strip him and bend him over the edge of the pool, I resist. In the last week, we’ve done nothing but fuck like bunnies.

It’s almost pathetic how much I always want him, but I don’t feel bad because he wants me just as much.

Every spare minute alone has been spent fucking—or practicing as he puts it—but it hasn’t been enough.

A part of me thought I’d get tired of it.

Not him, of course, but just sex. There’s only so much you can have before it becomes boring, right?

With Reign, however, it’s never dull. It’s never routine.

I love the sex. I love fucking my way into him and holding him while he squirms and cries underneath me.

I like feeling his powerful thighs bracketing my sides as I pound into my hole. It’s always so… special.

Kill me.

But that’s what it is. Special. It’s time where it’s the two of us and everything else disappears. Nothing about us is wrong and nothing about us is different. We connect on a level deeper than I ever thought possible for two people.

And when I get to hold him after? It’s my favorite part. Or, actually, my favorite part is him holding me . I love feeling small in his arms as he runs his calloused fingers through my hair and kisses my forehead. I relish the fact that we take care of each other in different ways.

While I’d love to feel that again, I shake my head but still kiss him. “No. Two kids? Why?”

“So that one isn’t lonely,” he says simply. “I don’t think I could handle more than that. Kids are a lot of work.” I hum under my breath in agreement and catch his raised brow. “Any reason you’re askin’?”

“We have to start thinking about these things,” I state bluntly, noting when he tenses in my hold.

His eyes widen comically. “What? Santi, we’re eighteen.”

“So? We need to be prepared for the future. Are we going to use your sperm or mine?”

“ Sperm ?”

I can see where I might be coming off a bit too strong.

Reign’s correct that we’re young, but we’re never young enough to start planning.

I love this man. That’s not something I’ve ever given freely before.

To me, that means something. It’s permanent.

It’s forever. Our moment in the truck bed, shadowed by our land rig, proved it to me.

He’s mine. No matter what age, what place, what circumstance.

Forever .

But I hold myself back. There will be time to discuss these things. Maybe Reign is right and this isn’t the time or place. It doesn’t mean I’m forgetting about this, but I’ll table it for now. Either way, we shouldn’t decide whose sample will be used until we both get tested?—

“Can’t we just enjoy the summer?” he asks with a sweet sideways smile as he wraps his arms around my neck. “Let’s leave the baby makin’ until later.”

I was about to but there’s something about his question that hits me. “What do you mean ‘enjoy the summer’?”

He blinks at me. “Um, exactly what I said? Let’s have fun and?—”

“ Fun ?” I’m the one that’s shocked now. I push him away on instinct and tread water alone. “You just want to have fun?”

“That’s not what I said,” he defends, confused as he reaches for me. When I yank myself away, he frowns. “Baby, why are you actin’ like this?”

“Acting like what?” I snarl.

“Like that ,” he yells back, noting my tone. “What just happened?”

I’m not too sure. It’s like suddenly it’s hard to breathe.

A panic I’ve never felt settles in and my heart seizes my chest. I’m completely paralyzed with the fear that Reign thinks this is only temporary.

That what we have is just for the summer.

Does he not realize what it means when I say I love you? Or does he not care?

Either way, he’s about to learn.

I propel myself forward, hooking my arms around him, and drag him under the water.

He struggles underneath the surface, eyes wide as I grip his face and slam my lips against his.

It’s completely uncomfortable making out with water rushing into our mouths and the chlorine stinging our eyes, but I do it.

I make sure to keep eye contact with him as I devour his mouth, tangling our legs together so he can’t escape.

I pour all my frustration and fear and insecurity into this kiss.

I don’t want to let him go, but when it becomes hard to breathe, I bring us back to the surface.

He sputters for breath, his skin a blue-ish grey color as he tries to regain his bearings. “Santi, what the fuck?—”

“That’s what I’d do for you, Reign,” I tell him adamantly, smashing our foreheads together as I also struggle to breathe. “I’d give you all of me. I’d hold myself under until I couldn’t any longer. I’d give you my very last breath.”

As the anger fades, his eyes soften and he nods, running his thumb down my bottom lip. “That’s great, baby. I feel the same, but did you have to drag me down with you?”

I don’t know. Well, when you love someone, you suffer together.

Right?