Page 11 of Nevermore (A Cruel Love #1)

NINE

REIGN

I’m such a goddamn idiot.

As I stare at myself in the mirror, I can’t help but tell myself again how stupid I am. If they’re giving out prizes for making bad decisions, I just earned myself the MVP trophy.

I can’t believe the things I said to Santiago a few days ago. I’ve been beating myself up about it all week. Now that it’s Friday, and with the weekend fast approaching, I have a feeling that the consequences of my actions are going to bite me in the ass.

But what was I supposed to do? He just kept pushing .

After the day I had—my introduction to their extravagant world, being belittled by Kingston, getting thrown into the pool—I couldn’t take anymore.

I was sad, frustrated, and at the end of the line.

What I needed was comfort, maybe just to watch a movie with him or something, not even conversation, but I got demeaned instead.

I snapped.

I’ve never said anything like that to anyone before. That’s just not me. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I can’t stand up for myself and I don’t like being the type of person that brings other people down. But Santiago was just asking for it.

But now I regret it. Not just because it could have potentially damaged my relationship with him—I think that ship’s sailed—but because I turned into someone I didn’t like. It was like survival of the fittest and I had to bare my teeth to avoid being killed.

I think I’d rather be a herbivore.

I know I have to apologize. It’s in my nature to want to make things better, especially if I’m the one that caused the damage to begin with.

Mama wouldn’t want me to just let this tension sit between us.

Not that there is any tension, really. Santiago hasn’t spoken to me since the incident.

He’s probably quietly stewing in his room, planning my demise.

Or something like that.

Either way, I’m going to act the way I was raised and be the bigger person.

With that in mind, I give myself one more nod, and adjust my hat—which I’m pretty sure still ends up crooked—and walk out the bathroom.

I grab my old backpack, hoping to be able to go to the nearby park I saw and whittle.

I head towards the main wing and go to the kitchen first to grab something to eat before I leave.

Mama’s been sleeping in since the first day, so I’m surprised to see her already waiting for me at the kitchen island.

“Good mornin’, baby,” she says brightly as she pours herself a glass of orange juice. She looks at my backpack and smiles. “Oh, I know what you’re up to. Do you need a ride somewhere?”

I’m about to respond when I’m cut off by another voice. “I’ll take him.”

I freeze as Santiago appears beside me, an unusually… happy smile on his lips. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nowhere near an actual smile, but I think the closest he can get to one. He throws his arm around my shoulders and tugs me to his side. “Want to take the BMW today?”

“I…” I’m at a complete loss for what to say. I look at Mama for some help but all she does is shrug. “I… Sure.”

“Great,” he says. He snags two bananas and hands me one. “Breakfast on the go.”

“Right,” I mumble, leaning over the island to kiss Mama’s cheek. “You have a good day.”

“Have a lovely day, Holly,” Santiago tells her as he grabs my elbow to drag me along behind him. “Come on.”

I follow dumbly and let him move me around like a rag doll. Once we’re in the garage, he goes to the assortment of keys on the wall and picks the one for the BMW. He unlocks the car and gestures for me to get in which I do with great hesitation.

“Where are we headed?”

“Um…” I nibble on my bottom lip as I hold my seat with a vice grip. “Is there a park around here?”

He thinks it over and nods. “Smallwood is just ten minutes away. I’ll take you there.” He pauses and gestures at the car’s smart screen. “Why don’t you choose the music today?”

My eyes widen. “You want to listen to country?”

“Sure. Why not?”

“Um, because I’m pretty sure you hate it?”

“Nonsense.”

Even with his permission, I keep my hands glued to my lap.

His pleasantries are putting me on edge.

I came to Crescent Hills with an open mind and optimism for this new life, but now I’m jaded and suspicious of everything.

He drives us somewhere I don’t recognize, taking back roads that remind me more of The Range than Crescent Hills.

For a minute, I hold my tongue, until I can’t anymore. “I wanna apologize.”

He cocks his head and raises a brow. “For what?”

“For snappin’ at you,” I clarify through a gulp. “I said some things I shouldn’t have. Mama would tan my behind if she heard any of it. It’s not the kind of person I am, so I’m sorry.”

“Right,” he says, humming to himself as he focuses on the road. His eyes flick towards me and then down to my backpack. “What’s that for?”

My face reddens with embarrassment. “Um… I whittle.”

“You what ?”

“Whittle,” I whisper, praying he doesn’t ask me anymore about it.

He scrutinizes me for a minute. For those brief passing seconds, I see glimpses of the Santiago I know peeking through the surface. It’s like he can’t even help it. His natural setting is apathetic robot 2.0 and playing nice must be exhausting him.

He parks the car once we reach our destination and sighs as his eyes dart from my face to my hat. “Come here.”

I cock my head in confusion and he rolls his eyes as he fists my shirt and yanks me towards him.

In this small space, my nose is a hair's breadth away from his and the smell of him invades my nostrils. Crisp, clean— Can you describe someone’s scent as foggy?

In a good way, that is? Like the mist in a forest after rainfall.

The fingers wrapped around my shirt tighten, he pulls me closer, resting his lips just beside my ear which causes me to shiver. “Your hat is crooked.”

With his face still pressed close to mine, he takes my hat off, and then meticulously puts it back. My breaths are ragged and I can’t help the way I tremble when his fingers brush the skin right behind my ear. “W-What are you doing?”

“Helping,” he says simply. His hand migrates to my throat and settles there at the base, not encircling my neck, but merely resting there as he inspects his work. “Better.”

I lick my suddenly chapped lips as I stare at him. He’s painstakingly beautiful and I wonder if other people get as mesmerized by his deep pools of black as I do. Not understanding these thoughts in my head, I try to change the subject. “So? My apology?”

“It isn’t necessary,” he states as he finally lets me go. Then a look I’ve never seen on him before appears. Something I didn’t think he was capable of. He smirks—cocky and sultry all in one—and winks at me. “You and I are going to have so much fun together, Reign.”

I have no idea what he could possibly mean but my body reacts nonetheless. I gasp lightly and basically scramble out of the car. I’m overwhelmed again but only by his presence and the implications his words have.

I have a feeling I won’t like Santiago’s version of fun .