Page 28

violet

While a celebration rages on below us on the first floor of the ice house, Neo and I are tucked away in his bedroom, intertwined in each other.

He is spooning me from the back, scissored between my legs, fucking me sideways as he grips my breasts for leverage.

“You have to be quiet,” he teases as I moan a little too loudly. “What happened to the girl who didn’t even want to be caught dead in here? Now they can all hear how I make you come.”

“No, they can’t!” I pant.

“They’re about to.”

Neo fucks me deeper as his mouth settles into the side of my neck, sucking the skin softly.

My orgasm is winding slowly and my moans are growing louder, so he places a gentle hand over my mouth as he continues to work me into orgasmic submission.

My release hits me hard and I arch my back as every muscle in my body contracts with pleasure.

“That’s my sweet pussy,” he purrs into my ear as he massages my clit, giving me aftershocks that make me shudder.

“I love you,” I tell him, basking in the afterglow of our lovemaking.

“I love you too, Grinch.”

He casually smacks my ass as he rises from the bed.

“I have to make an appearance downstairs. This was a big win and I have to make sure they don’t burn down the place. I’m going to go and when you’re ready, you can follow me down there, okay?”

“Sure,” I smile.

“Take your time.” He gives me a kiss on the lips. “Maybe later I’ll eat your pussy in the shower.”

“Okay,” I laugh.

I have a unique opportunity at this moment. I’m alone in Neo’s room, which rarely happens, so it would be the perfect time to snoop. I’ve never done this before. I’m not that girl who steals her boyfriend’s social media passwords or follows him after a party. There were girls in high school who made that damn near a full-time job. I was never in a relationship serious enough to warrant that.

But now you are, Violet .

After cleaning myself up and putting my clothes back on, I stall for time, tidying up the room and making the bed. Finally, when there isn’t one more thing I can fold or put away, I start the search. The obvious first place to start is his desk. If there was anything important lying around, I’m sure it would be in one of these drawers.

I’m relieved as I search methodically through each drawer to find nothing much but school supplies, hockey stuff and a box of condoms. At this point, I’m feeling super guilty for violating Neo’s privacy when I spot his backpack in the room's corner. The bag is stuffed to the brim with notebooks, a laptop, a t-shirt and a very official-looking folder. I take a deep breath as I pull the folder out of the bag, opening it to reveal its contents. I’m still processing everything I’ve read when Neo enters the room.

“You’ve got to see what’s going on downstairs, babe.” He freezes when he sees what I’m holding. “Violet?”

The world around me blurs into a watercolor of heartache as I stand to face him, holding the various letters that have just detonated our love like a grenade. Neo, with his tousled hair the color of a sunrise and eyes like a stormy sea, stands across from me in the cramped confines of his room, a chasm of unspoken words yawning between us.

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me,” I whisper, my voice trembling like a leaf in a tempest. “You’re leaving VCU?”

He runs a hand through his hair. “Violet, I?—”

“You’re leaving school for the NHL?” My voice rises, a crescendo of disbelief and hurt. “And I had to find out from some letters hidden in your bag?”

Neo looks at me, and there’s a storm brewing in his eyes, a tempest of regret and something unspoken.

“I was going to tell you,” he says, his voice a low rumble, like distant thunder. “But it’s complicated.”

“When were you going to tell me? After you packed your bags?” I scoff, the sound bitter in my ears. “And look, you have so many choices.”

He takes a step closer, his presence overwhelming, like a wave about to crash. “I haven’t made any decisions about where yet.”

“And what about us?” The question hangs in the air, fragile and fraught with unshed tears. “Is fucking me just a pastime until you figure out where you’re going next?”

“Of course not.” His denial comes quick, but it lacks conviction. “You mean everything to me.”

I laugh, but it’s void of humor, a hollow sound echoing off the walls. “Everything? Yet, here we are, with you ready to skate off into your shiny new life, leaving me behind, exactly how Kennedy predicted.”

Neo’s jaw clenches, and he looks away, the muscles in his neck tensing. There’s something more he wants to say to me, but he won’t and it’s only making me angrier. If now is the time to come clean, this is it.

“And what’s this about?” I ask him, showing him another piece of paper. This one is from an orthopedic surgeon.

“It’s nothing. Coach wants me to get my hand checked out.”

“That hand?” I point to the hand that he always clenches. The one that always seems to bother him, especially when he’s stressed.

“Yes, Violet.”

“How did you injure it?” I ask, replaying every conversation I’ve ever had or anything I’ve ever heard about Neo since the moment I stepped foot on campus.

“What?” His face becomes as white as a sheet.

“How did you hurt yourself, Neo? Because I know it’s not from hockey. According to everything I’ve read, you’ve never had a major hockey injury.”

“I was in a car accident,” he finally admits, his voice a mere whisper, a breeze trying to soothe the raging fire within me.

“ The car accident?” I ask without pity.

He doesn’t respond.

“You told me that your brother was hit by a drunk driver. Were you in the car with him when your brother died?”

A feeling of dread seems to settle in his bones. “How do you know that, Violet?”

The pain this discussion is causing Neo hurts me to my heart, but I need him to be honest with me…for once. I just need to know exactly who I’ve been sleeping with. Who I’ve fallen in love with.

“I just know.”

“Yes, I was in the car.”

“You never mentioned that before.”

“It’s hard to talk about, Violet.”

“But we’ve shared so many other things. I’ve damn near bared my soul to you. You know everything about my mother’s death.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t kill her!” he roars.

There it is.

“So you were driving the car?” I whisper, just like Kennedy suspected.

“Yes, I was driving, but everyone thinks that Jake was. It’s just a matter of time before it comes out, Violet. And I need to go pro before it all vanishes,” he explains desperately, dropping to his knees in front of me.

The utter hell Neo must have been going through all these years is unimaginable. I’ve felt some sort of survivor’s guilt for not getting my mom to the hospital, which I know was unrealistic and wouldn’t have saved her life, anyway. But his guilt must be excruciating.

“I hate this for you, but I just wish you could have told me,” I say regretfully. “You know I hate secrets and now I don’t trust you.”

“Going into the NHL won’t change anything for us, baby. In fact, it just means we can be together more. We can travel. I will give you the world.”

“Did you ever consider what I would want?” The realization of his complete selfishness is like a bucket of ice water, dousing my last embers of hope.

“Violet, please...” He reaches for my thighs, but I step back, an instinctive retreat.

“Don’t,” I say, my voice barely above a whisper. “Don’t make this harder than it already is.”

There’s a silence then, a void where once there was laughter and love. I can see the struggle in Neo’s eyes, the war between his dream and our reality.

“I thought we were in this together,” I continue, each word laced with a bitterness I never knew I possessed. “But you made your choice, and you did it alone.”

Neo’s shoulders slump, a warrior conceding defeat. “I’m sorry, Violet. I truly am. But there are other people I have to consider.”

I nod, a mechanical motion, my heart feeling like it’s been shattered into a million irreparable pieces. “I get it. Hockey is your dream. I’m just a blip on your radar.”

“Don’t say that! You know that isn’t true. I can still have that dream and have you in it. Nothing has to change.”

“I’m afraid that’s where you’re wrong.” I lay the folder on his desk and head to the door. “Everything’s changed.”

“Violet, don’t you walk out the door!” He commands.

“We’re outside of the love bubble, Neo. We’re not in bed. You don’t get to tell me what to do. You don’t get to say shit to me ever again unless I allow it.”

His eyes widen. “What are you saying?”

“This is over.”

“Because of this?” His fist lands hard on the tabletop, making a loud sound, and the papers inside the folder fly.

“Because of who we are. We’re just too different.”

“That’s what makes us work.”

“It doesn’t matter, anyway. You’re leaving and I’m not. I came here with my own dreams, Neo. I’m going to finish my degree in the very place where my mom didn’t get a chance to. I’m going to get into law school. I’m going to have a fantastic career as a litigator somewhere and in that life, there’s no room for me to be the girlfriend of a professional hockey player. Think about it.”

“I won’t let you go,” he unclenches the same fist and uses it to cradle the side of my face. “I love you, Violet. Please don’t hurt me like this.”

Hurt him?

He just doesn’t get it.

I turn my head and kiss the inside of his palm. “There are the way that I want things and then there’s the way that things are. Good bye, Neo.”

I walk out of his bedroom door and try fighting back the tears as he recklessly calls after me.

“You’re pissing me off, Violet. This shit ain’t funny. Come back here.”

There’s a lot of people in the main room of the house, including Shane, Bass, and Lucia. They watch the both of us with cautious glances, but I don’t respond to Neo at all.

“I’m speaking to you!” He yells wildly. “Shane, don’t let her leave.”

Shane looks at me with pleading eyes, but I ignore them. Neo runs down the stairs, grabbing me by the arm.

“Stop ignoring me.”

The entire team watches Neo lose his shit. I hate how this is probably coming off to everyone. Their captain, their ice hero, looks like a crazy lovesick boy, running after the cold-hearted girl who broke his heart.

“Let go of me,” I say cooly.

“Violet,” he says through gritted teeth.

“Let me go.”

He releases my arm put then points to every player in the room.

“If any one of you lets her leave this house, I will fuck you up.”

“Carino, ?qué haces?” Lucia says to him and I don’t know the translation of what she asked, but the intent is pretty clear. She wants him to relax.

“Cap, you need to calm down,” Bass says, like he’s staring down the barrel of a loaded gun. “If Violet wants to go home, then that’s her prerogative. She’s a guest here.”

“Are you okay?” Shane asks, approaching me slowly.

“This is a personal disagreement between the two of us. I just need a chance to explain some things to her,” Neo tells the room. “Everything’s fine.”

“Are you willing to stay a bit longer, Violet?” Shane asks me.

I shake my head no.

Silent tears rolling down my face.

“She doesn’t want to stay, Neo,” Shane tells him. “Why don’t the both of you sleep on it and revisit things in the morning?”

“Please, Violet.” Neo says, pain etched in his voice.

My resolve is slipping.

I have to get out before I change my mind.

So I run.

Right out the front door and down the road toward campus.

Thankfully, no one listened to him and tried to stop me.

But when I turn my head back to look, I can see Shane and Bass forcibly restraining a wildly irate Neo from chasing after me. He’s mouthing the words I love her .

And it breaks my heart.