Page 94 of My Fault

Seeing how angry I was getting, everyone laid off me.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to take you?” Mario asked for the eighth time in a minute. When he saw my scowl, he threw his hands up to let me know he’d given up.

“Okay, okay!” he said, laughing. “But put some ice on it, and if you get sick or anything happens, call me. I’ll take you to the hospital.”

Ugh… I had to get out of there now.

“Thanks, Mario,” I said, kissing him on the cheek and getting into my car.

A half hour later, I was walking through the door to Bar 48. I didn’t love working, but on that day in particular, it was the last place I wanted to be. I’d lied to everyone—actually I wasn’t fine at all. My side was hurting, and my head felt like it was going to explode.

“Hey, girl,” said Jenni, one of the waitresses working that shift. She was nice, even if we didn’t have much in common. “You’re in a good mood, bitch,” she said, smacking her gum.

See what I mean?

I changed into my work shirt and got started. It was a Thursday, but the place was packed. I got off at ten, and I couldn’t wait to get back home.

“Hey, Noah,” my boss said. He was breaking his back serving drinks. “Any way you can stay late tonight? You can make back your hours from the other day.”

No, please!I wanted to shout, but there was nothing I could do. I scuttled off briefly to the break room, made myself a little ice pack, and pressed it against my forehead. That jabbing pain wouldn’t go away, and I was feeling worse by the second.

I kept on working even though I had to step off the floor twice to vomit in the staff bathroom. Something was evidently wrong, and I started to wonder if I really should go to the hospital. I washed my mouth out. When I emerged, I nearly had a heart attack: Ronnie was there. He was standing in the corner with a group of guys. I was terrified. That letter in my pocket felt like it was burning, and I had the urge to take off running. I could still remember his face as he was shooting at me.

“Take care of those guys,” my boss ordered me, passing me a tray of shots. Shit. I wasn’t even supposed to serve alcohol, but we were so busy they didn’t care about breaking the rules. I tried to ask Jenni for help, but she was even busier than I was.

I grabbed the tray and set the shots down quickly, hoping against hope they wouldn’t notice me.

“I can’t believe it,” Ronnie said, grabbing my arm.

“Let me go.” I tried to keep a cool head.

“Oh, come on, stick around a while.” I could feel his hatred for me, his contempt. I’d humiliated him, and a person like him couldn’t let that go.

His friends were cracking up. I didn’t know what to do. With all those people there, my boss couldn’t even see me.

“What do you want, Ronnie?” I asked between clenched teeth.

“I’d like to fuck you every which way, how about that?” His friends started laughing.

“You better let me go if you don’t want me to have the door guy toss you out on your ass,” I threatened.

“How’s your boyfriend?” he continued. “Last time I saw him, he was crying like a baby asking for us to leave him alone.”

I remembered the beating Nick had received—the beating that had been my fault—and the nausea I’d felt that whole afternoon returned.

“Let me go—you’re hurting me,” I said, twisting my wrist in his iron grip.

“You listen to me real close,” he said, pulling me closer so I could see his repulsive mouth moving. “You tell Nicholas that—”

Just then, an arm wrapped around my waist, a dull thud knocked Ronnie away, and all at once, Nicholas was in front of me, blocking me with his body.

“What should she tell me?” he asked calmly.

Ronnie smiled and stood up, face-to-face with him.

My heart started pounding.Not again, please.

“Hey, we missed you, bruh,” he said with a dark smile that horrified me. “You don’t come around no more… It’s like you’ve gone soft.”