Page 53 of More Than Scars
“Been there, done that, regret it immensely.”
“Exactly, you know what happens when you walk around thinking nothing can touch you.”
“Yeah, it smacks you with a car and sends you thought a window,” I replied, chuckling a little.
He grinned at that, and for the first time, I realized that I could toss a joke around like that and not even flinch. Progress, that’s what my therapist would say.
“You wouldn’t have the slot if you weren’t ready,” he said. “That’s all you need to think about it. That you’ve got a whole team behind you that knows you guys are gonna nail this. When you walk out there, your focus needs to be on the music, not those scars. I don’t wanna see you fuck with your hair, I don’t wanna see you duck your head, and I sure as fuck don’t wanna see you try and hide behind Tony when things get intense. He needs you beside him, and Claude needs you in front of him if he starts racing, ‘cause we both know the temptation is gonna be there for him and you need to shut that shit down when it happens so that you guys perform the way you’ve been doing. Can you do that?”
I nodded, but this was clearly not a time for non-verbal responses, because his eyes just narrowed into a scowl.
“Yeah, I can,” I replied, and as if to emphasize that, I took the elastic off my wrist and tied my hair back, ‘cause it was damn near time to get ready and I wanted him to see that I didn’t plan to hide.
“Good, now go get your ass ready for Imminent’s Rocktoberfest debut. All the Masterson bands will be watching, so…”
“Don’t fuck it up,” I finished for him, earning a grin and a quick hug before I took off to find the bus.
“Bowie!”
I turned, shocked to see Pressley looking a little less than put together as he chased after me. Unable to put on the brakes, he crashed into me, which was perfectly fine. My fingers tangled in his hair, and I kissed him until I couldn’t breathe. His hands found my ass as he grinded against me.
“Inside, now!” He barked, sending a shiver down my spine that got me moving.
Whether he knew it or not, he’d just hit the level of command voice I positively loved and tripped my already high libido into overdrive. Kissing, groping, wrestling with clothes that went flying in every which direction as we shucked them, we bounced off every surface on the way to the bedroom, where there was barely time for prep before he entered me and sent my thoughts whirling.
“Please,” I begged, unable to put words to what I needed.
He knew, though, and pinned me to the bed as he thrust into me, hard, fast, and rough, until I was right there on the edge.
“I love you!” He growled with a snap of his hips and one hand heavy on my shoulder, controlling and guiding me as I fell apart beneath him.
It was like everything froze, then shook and shattered, leaving me wrung out as I lay gasping on the bed, the chaos in my mind silent and still.
“Love you too,” I groaned as I draped an arm over him as he collapsed beside me.
“You’re not gonna love me in five minutes when I tell you that you absolutely have to get a quick shower and get dressed.”
Chuckling and knowing he was right, the one thing that helped motivate me was knowing that none of my band brothers would be beating on the door claiming I’d exceeded my water limit. Three coin toss wins had already rewarded me with more than my fair share of shower usage.
“Get moving,” he growled, slapping me on the ass. “I have got to find my clothes before someone comes looking for me.”
The thought of him being seen by everyone as anything less than put together left me smiling as I rolled, kissed him, grabbed the kilt, and the shredded Imminent Danger t-shirt I intended to wear when I took to the stage. Gotta love the free merch the talent got.
An hour later, that’s where I stood, with Claude beating out the intro to Fuck You! While I joined in on my guitar.
Hard, heavy, and everything we’d wanted it to be, we gave the crowd the anthem we wanted to be known by, at least for now, and I couldn’t have been prouder to do it, especially with my mom, dad, and uncle front and center in the VIP section, cheering us on. I could see on my mom’s face through the song that she understood how much of it was Tony laying aside his demons, letting his old man know that he hadn’t been able to stop him from living his dream. I was proud of my best friend, proud of all of us. We’d earned this, and we were gonna lay ourselves bare.
Fuck you for always saying no to me
Fuck you for being my first bully
Fuck you for siding with my enemies
Fuck you for turning your back on me
Fuck you for never supporting me
Fuck you for never believing in me