Page 19 of Love or Leave (Mapleton #4)

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C ara walked into Antonio's hotel room, feeling more nervous than she would have expected, considering how badly she wanted to be there.

She'd been so relieved he hadn't said no that she hadn't fully processed what she was in store for.

In fact, she was still reeling from their steamy kiss under the stars.

She took a few deep breaths and moved through the room, noting how neatly he'd placed his suitcase on the rack inside the closet, peering into the bathroom to see how he'd carefully unpacked his toiletries onto the counter.

She compared it to what her bathroom sink had looked like when they'd left for dinner that night and laughed. "I think I've found another thing we don't have in common."

"Really?" he asked, coming up close behind her and placing his hands on her upper arms. "What's that?"

His hands drifted up and down, warming her through her jacket. On instinct, she moved until her back pressed up against the front of his body. He reached around to the buttons of her jacket and slowly undid the top one.

His fingers unhooked the next three buttons, and her coat fell away. The cool air reached Cara’s too-hot skin and anticipation shot through her body.

"What's that, Cara?"

"What's what?"

A low chuckle came from his chest as he took the lapels of her coat and pulled, dragging the scratchy wool fabric down her shoulders. Shivers zinged across her skin.

He dropped the coat on the floor and reached his hand to her neck, pulling her hair back and leaning in close. His lips grazed her ear. "What don't we have in common?"

A gasp escaped and her head flopped to the side as he trailed kisses her from her ear to her neck and across her shoulder.

"You're tidy," she breathed out.

He let out a hum as he kissed his way back to her ear. "Are you messy?"

"Yes," she said with a sigh, but it came out as encouragement. She never wanted his mouth to leave her neck.

"What else don't we have in common?"

She focused her thoughts. "You like sports."

"Mmm."

His mouth was still on her neck, but his hands were moving down to her back and to the top of her zipper. "I'm not that into sports,” he countered. “I just needed something to do besides work and sitting alone in my apartment."

"You played when you were younger, though, and if you played with Max, then you must have been pretty good."

He took the zipper and slowly inched it down.

"I was a fast skater and a decent puck handler, but I only kept playing because my dad wanted me to. When I broke my leg, my mom made me stop and I don't remember being too torn up about it."

Her back cooled as he exposed more and more of her skin. She was lost in the deep vibration of his voice.

She wanted more.

"What made you want to be a doctor?"

"I like gross things."

Cara laughed, but it caught in her throat as her dress gave way from being too loose and slid down her shoulders, exposing her torso.

"Do we have that in common?" he asked.

She shrugged. "I don't mind checking out the occasional festering wound."

Antonio gave a warm, rich laugh. He backed away slightly and the space he created made her dress drop and pool at her feet. He took her by the waist and turned her to face him.

She was exposed and chilled, yet the gentle way his hands circled her skin, as if she was something precious, warmed her. He reached his hand to her temple and pushed aside her bangs, as if trying to get a better look.

"I like beautiful things, too," he said, scanning her face and landing on her eyes. "Like big brown eyes that shimmer like stars." His gaze dropped to her mouth, and he traced her bottom lip with his thumb. "And soft red lips that taste like dessert."

She was speechless.

Literally speechless.

She parted her lips, knowing she should speak at that moment, but had no words. She moved in closer and pressed her lips to his, soft at first, until she felt a low sound rise from his chest—as if he’d found great relief—and he deepened the kiss.

She almost couldn't believe it was happening. She was in Antonio's hotel room, and he wanted her—a lot, it would seem.

Her hands moved up and into his soft, thick hair, and she pulled him closer, wanting more—needing more. His hands moved, gliding up her back, over the clasp of her bra, down to the waistband of her panties, then sweeping back up.

She wanted to rip the rest of her clothing off. Wanted to see him and feel him with nothing in between them.

She broke the kiss and moved her hands to his belt to unbuckle it. When she glanced up at him, his eyelids were low, and his breathing was shallow and fast. She tugged the buckle loose, letting it clatter open, then reached for the button of his pants.

"Cara?"

She looked back up, seeing that his face was strained. "Yeah?"

"You're sure about this, right?"

"As sure as I am that the earth is round."

He tilted his head to the side. "Well, you can't know that for certain."

She snapped away from him as her jaw dropped. "Oh my God," she said, her head shaking. "Please tell me you're joking. I can’t sleep with a Flat Earther."

He smiled and let out his rich laugh. "Of course I'm joking," he said. His hand reached up to her face, and he ran his thumbs gently across the tops of her cheeks. His smile faded into a serious expression.

"I just want to make sure we're going to be okay after this."

Her eyebrows raised at the seriousness of his tone. He was obviously worried about what would happen after this, but he didn't need to worry. She knew what this was. And she'd become pretty good at keeping secrets from Max.

"We'll be fine, Antonio," she said, wondering how to reassure him she wouldn't get attached and expect a marriage proposal as if they were living in eighteenth-century Britain and he'd defiled her.

"I know this isn't going anywhere," she said.

His movements suddenly stopped and he gave her a blank look. "That's not…"

He paused, staring for a while, then reached a hand up and rubbed the back of his neck. "You do?"

Cara nodded and a hot tingle of embarrassment crept up her neck as she realized she would have to tell him the truth.

"I don't have a ton of experience in this department, and I was hoping I could, you know…"

He stared at her and gave a slight shake of his head, clearly not quite understanding what she was trying to say.

God, this was humiliating.

"You know… Get practice."

Cara saw his body freeze and his jaw drop, then his head bend slightly forward, as if he was trying hard to process how pathetic she was.

"Practice?" he asked.

She nodded but refused to elaborate. He was smart enough to get what she was saying. And standing in front of him in her underwear had already made her feel way too vulnerable.

"Uh," he stumbled around slightly, with a general sort of awkwardness.

Fuck. This was going south. Fast.

"I know you want Fran." Cara hoped to do some damage control and salvage this. "And I want to see where things go with Jalen. I was just hoping, since you're technically single, that we could… Well, that I might learn how to be better…"

She wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Why had she said all that? She should have just said “don't worry, all is good” and taken off his pants.

She chanced a look at his face, expecting him to be wincing in second-hand embarrassment for her, but he had drawn his eyebrows together and fixed his gaze on the floor.

He was deep, deep in thought.

"Ugh," she said. "I made everything awkward. We can just forget about this and go to sleep."

He stared at her for a long moment before finally speaking. "You want to see where things go with Jalen?"

Her eyebrows shot up. He was hesitating because of Jalen?

"We've only been on one date. It's not official or serious or anything."

He gave a solemn nod. Maybe he didn't want her there at all anymore. She'd clearly misread something. She didn't expect him to be offended.

She felt pain in her palms and realized she'd been clutching her fists so tightly in anxiety that her nails had dug into her palms.

"Do you want me to go?"

"No."

He said it so fast, Cara got a surge of renewed hope that he wasn't going to kick her out of the room. But then he fell silent again.

Ugh .

"I just feel comfortable around you," she went on, in another attempt at damage control. "And I want this, and I thought you wanted this too and we're both technically single… Can you please say something?"

Antonio looked at her and smirked but stayed silent.

She rolled her eyes and suppressed a laugh. "Seriously, I'm feeling very… exposed right now."

He moved closer to her and wrapped his big, warm arms around her protectively. She dropped her cheek to his chest.

"I want to be with you," he said. "More than anything. But my head is everywhere right now."

"Same," she said, her voice muffled in his deliciously scented shirt.

"Okay," he said, his hands moving up her back and into her hair. His fingertips grazed her scalp and she groaned.

She waited for him to say more, but nothing came. Finally, she lifted her face off his chest and looked into his eyes. "Elaborate, please."

He bent to kiss her lips, and when his tongue touched hers, her body grew feverish. He bent lower, his hands going under her thighs, then picked her up without breaking the kiss.

All the air left her lungs as her feet lifted off the floor. He turned and placed her on the edge of the mattress.

"I want to do this," he said. "As long as you do."

She smiled. "I do."

"Good," he said, reaching for the button of his pants, which were now eye-level with her. He traced his thumb across her lower lip. "Let's start here."

Her whole body zinged, and her jaw dropped.

"Perfect," he said with a smirk, then unzipped his pants.

A moment passed before the rush of need surged through her, and then she reached up and took over his zipper, loosening and pulling down his pants and boxers until he was free.

She bent forward, but he stopped her with his hands on her shoulders.

"Take your time," he breathed out.