Page 15

Lux

T his was the biggest fucking mistake I’d ever made in my lifetime, and as a CEO, I had made countless mistakes. I had learned from all of them, and they had made me the person I was.

The billionaire I was, to be exact.

I was cutthroat. I knew how to run a business. I knew how to make money.

What I didn't know was how to tear myself from Juliette.

Because no matter what I kept telling myself, no matter how much I tried to stop myself, I always found myself getting closer to her. Touching her. Begging her.

I have never repeated a mistake more than once. Juliette was the exception to that rule.

The worst part was that I could still taste her, no matter how much I tried to get rid of her.

No matter how much I tried to remind myself that we weren’t supposed to be together.

That it was wrong. That Bella needed her.

That we couldn’t jeopardize Bella’s happiness, especially when Bella seemed to be… bonding with her.

I was really trying not to care about her, but desire outweighed my rational mind.

And the damnedest thing was that my brain was trying to convince me it wasn’t a mistake at all. It kept reminding me how good we felt together. How right it was. How I knew she was meant for me from the moment I met her in the club bedroom.

She was my angel. Perfectly made for me. Sent to me from wherever she came from.

I would only be working half a day. I had three meetings, multiple emails to send, and at least five project proposals or reports to read, but the entire time I was just waiting until the clock struck eleven-thirty so I could get in my car and meet my niece and her nanny for lunch.

I sat at my desk, my laptop open in front of me, but I wasn't even looking at the words on the screen. Instead, I had a pen in my hand, and I was tapping it against my desk, my eyes trained on the clock.

My laptop pinged with a message from my assistant.

Gilbert asked if he could have an emergency meeting with you in five. Just confirming if you have time. Your calendar is empty.

Quickly, I went into my calendar and blocked off eleven-thirty to two p.m. Then I messaged her back.

If it's an emergency, he can either ping me or email me. He can even call, but I have other things to do. I don't have time to meet.

And just as I hit Send, the bastard himself messaged me on our company’s messaging system.

There are issues with the numbers on the transparency report. I need to talk about it now. Press is calling us out.

I dropped my head into my hands. They were waiting for me, and I wasn't going to fuck this up. Bella had been so excited about going out to lunch. There was no way I was going to miss it.

There was also no way that I was going to miss my first real meal outside with Juliette.

I pushed my chair back and walked to my door, dragging it open to see Gilbert talking to my assistant about ten feet away from me. Both of them stopped what they were doing to look up at me.

“You have ten minutes,” I said, opening my door and motioning for him to come in. “I need to know what the errors were, what you're going to do to fix them, and who I need to fire.”

His eyebrow shot to his hairline.

“Fire?” he asked with a shaky voice but hurried into my office.

I shut the door behind him.

Yeah, fire for jeopardizing my date with Juliette and my niece.

I didn't mean to act like a woman obsessed, but I couldn't help it. I was getting even more annoyed just looking at him as he floundered to give me an excuse.

“Well, you see, my team triple-checked the numbers before publishing anything, but then this morning I got an email from?—”

“What are you doing to fix it?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.

“I still have his email pending in my inbox. I didn't want to reply without talking to you?—”

“That's it?” I asked. “You want to talk to me about it? No plan?”

Maybe some other day I would've taken pride in watching him squirm under my questioning, but today I had no patience for it. My eyes fell down to my wrist, taking in the time displayed on my watch.

Eleven thirty-six.

“Get this sorted out today,” I ordered as I walked past him, grabbing my stuff. “I don't pay you to come ask me how to do your job. Find out what was published incorrectly, fix it, and then get back to the board saying it’s been fixed. It's not that hard.”

“But Lux?—”

“Anything else?” I asked, turning to him, but I was already at the door, my hand ready to pull it open.

He froze under my gaze.

“No, that’s all. I’ll work on it today.”

I gave him a nod and left the office, but not before stopping by my assistant’s desk.

“Get me that report,” I ordered.

“It's already in your inbox,” she replied, her voice low. “It's been there for a few hours, actually.”

I felt a flicker of annoyance, but not as strong as the sinking feeling in my stomach as I realized that because of my obsession with the nanny, I had somehow overlooked something that important.

“Thank you. I'll have a look when I get back.”

I vowed to get my shit together. I had a company to run, and my time away made them soft. Made me soft . I was usually on top of everything and would've never let anything like this slip through.

I should have fired him on the spot. But instead, I was rushing down to my car and out of the parking lot, not even giving him a second thought because all I could think about was meeting my girls.

* * *

“Panic attacks are not normal, Bella,” Juliette said, giving the girl a look.

Work was far from my mind as I sat down at the diner table, sipping on my hot coffee and looking at Bella and Juliette.

Bella had finally decided where she wanted to go, and it was a surprise to all of us.

A small diner about thirty minutes away from our house that looked to still be run by a mom and pop and that also happened to have her favorite pie.

The seats inside were covered with an old plaid pattern, and pictures hung on every single wall—many of their family and, of course, their customers throughout the fifty-something years they’d been in business.

In no time, Bella had chowed down on a kid's meal and quickly requested a big piece of pie. The pie was obviously her main goal. It was about as big as her face, and the flavors changed with the season. At the moment, it was cherry.

The diner was quaint, cute even, if I was being generous. I had no idea if she remembered, but we’d been here when she was about four years old and half the size she was now.

When her parents were alive, they had brought us all here for Sunday brunch.

I forgot what we were celebrating or if it was just a random meal with the family, but I remembered my sister and her husband sitting in front of me while Bella sat next to me in a booster seat.

A seat she didn't need anymore, though sometimes she did still sit on her knees so she could lean on the table and take a huge bite of her pie without any of it falling on her.

I kept watching her, waiting for another outburst, but there was none.

She was sitting next to Juliette and eating her pie as happily as could be.

But I was still left with an uncomfortable feeling.

“So, remind me, what do we do when our chest starts to get tight and we can’t breathe?” Juliette asked. I don't know how we got back onto the topic of panic attacks, but it worried me. As if talking about it alone would trigger one.

It scared me to see Bella like that. To see her unable to breathe, crying, and looking to someone for help when I didn’t know how to help.

I’d just stood there while Juliette took care of it. Useless.

Apparently, that's what I was now. I couldn't work. I couldn't be a good aunt to Bella. Fuck, I couldn't even have a professional relationship with the nanny.

“Call an ambulance,” I replied.

Her eyes caught mine, a smile pulling at her lips. I had to stop looking at her, but I couldn't pull my gaze away. Every single time our eyes met, I got flashes of us together in my office, zaps of electricity ran up my spine, and I was left breathless.

And that has nothing to do with a panic attack.

“We blow out candles!” Bella said, pulling my attention back to her.

“Exactly.” Juliette patted the top of her head.

Her hair was in one single braid with a bow at the end. The same bow Juliette had brought that morning.

God, why is she so good at this?

I couldn't believe how easily she’d gotten along with Bella. I couldn't even count the number of nannies we’d been through to get here. But somehow, as soon as she showed up, everything changed.

She even messed up on the first day, something that none of the other nannies would have recovered from.

But she did.

Maybe because it was meant to be , I thought, before pushing that delusion out of my head. There it was again, the obsession.

“Oh, yeah, Lux,” Juliette said, turning serious. “There’s no good time to say this, so here goes. My landlady is ending my lease early, and I need to find a place to stay. I’m going to try to do it over the weekend, but I may need to take some days off here and there for viewings.”

My heart stopped.

A sinful thought flashed across my mind. I didn't want to say it out loud. I couldn't. But there had never been a time in my life when it felt like the universe had been more on my side than right now.

We had a spare room. She could stay there. I made sure to keep at least one available just in case and turned the rest into more functional rooms, like a gym.

It was supposed to be for guests, but let's be real, when had I ever had a fucking guest stay there? I didn’t plan on bringing anyone in there anytime soon either.

Plus, having her at home would actually be very beneficial. She could help Bella get ready in the morning and maybe help me set up a nighttime ritual for her that didn’t involve her going to her bedroom alone. They would never be late to school or breakfast.

She would always be with us.

Which is dangerous, so you can’t go there. You can’t have her that close ? —