Page 15 of Living for Truth (Broken Shelves #2)

Hannah

T he blonde woman snaps her gaze toward Morgan and so does Liam.

Liam does a double take to me and says, “Hannah?”

The blonde— Whitney— says, “Morgan?”

Since he’s the only one who hasn’t been mentioned, I say calmly, “Liam?”

Liam shakes his head. “What are you doing here?”

Whitney says the same thing to Morgan at the same time.

Morgan looks at me, and I subtly nod my head, so he says, “We’re on a date. Presumably you two are also on a date?”

Whitney squares her shoulders, but before she can say anything, Liam says incredulously, “ You are on a date ? With him? ”

I shrink back at the way he spits the words, like they taste sour in his mouth. The last thing I want right now is a confrontation with my ex-husband, but Morgan slides his arm around me and squeezes my hip in a comforting gesture.

“I don’t know why it’s so hard to believe, but yes, we’re on a date,” Morgan says confidently.

“Who is this guy, Whit?” Liam slides his arm possessively around Whitney, who’s glaring daggers at Morgan.

“This is my ex, Morgan,” Whitney explains through gritted teeth.

“We also share a whole child, but yeah, we dated.” Morgan drops that bomb like he’s talking about the weather, and my mouth pops open in an “o.”

So this is Aly’s mom. His ex. A permanent fixture in his life.

Jealousy and inadequacy start to rear their ugly heads, but I tamp them down.

This is a fake date. Morgan and Whitney aren’t together.

We aren’t together. I have no reason to be jealous.

The way he talks about Aly, it’s clear she’s the best thing that’s happened to him, and Whitney was part of that, whether I like it or not.

Liam’s head whips to Whitney so fast I’m surprised it didn’t snap. “You have a kid? ”

I’m suddenly very interested in this conversation. Liam made it clear at the end of our marriage he would never want kids, so the fact his date didn’t disclose that little tidbit is probably making his blood boil.

“Well, I don’t have full custody. He won’t—she doesn’t—” Whitney stutters.

“I can’t believe you have a child, Whit.

You didn’t think to mention that once in the four months we’ve been together?

” Liam’s tone is harsh. It’s one I didn’t hear often, but it was the one that stung the most. He used it when he was blaming me for the miscarriages we experienced and when he told me he no longer wanted to work on our marriage.

Whitney looks—rightfully—chastised, and Morgan butts in, “Not to worry, man. She hasn’t seen her in over a year, so she’s not very involved in our daughter’s life.”

Whitney looks like a tomato about to burst. “I’ve been busy.”

Morgan snorts. “Sure. I can see that. Whatever, that’s between you, me, and Aly. We can arrange a time for the three of us to chat later. If you don’t mind, it seems Katie has our drinks and is trying to get past you. I’d like to enjoy this evening with my girlfriend.”

My stomach flutters, and I tamp down that shit because I’m not his real girlfriend. But to sell the lie, he gazes at me like I’m his whole world and squeezes my hip again.

Katie apologizes to Liam and Whitney, sets down our drinks, then leaves.

Liam eyes my drink with clear revulsion. “So you’re an alcoholic now?”

“What I am is none of your business anymore. But no, I’m not. One drink does not an alcoholic make,” I say, proud my voice came out strong instead of shaky.

“Were you ever going to tell me you were seriously dating someone? Has my daughter met her? Are you bringing a parade of women around her?” Whitney spits.

“I haven’t introduced Aly to Hannah, and who I date is none of your business.

If you would like to have a civil conversation, then we can have one at a later time.

” Morgan’s voice leaves no room for argument.

It’s authoritative and calm, and even though the situation is not sexy, I feel a small spark of something in my lower belly.

“Fine. Let’s go, Liam.” Whitney tugs his arm, leading him away from our table.

He doesn’t say anything but leaves with a look of utter disgust on his face, like the mere sight of me repulses him.

I slump when they’re no longer in our sight, and Morgan takes a long sip of his cocktail.

“Well, that was fun. Super great first date,” he quips sarcastically.

“I feel like I’ve aged ten years,” I joke back.

He barks a laugh and kisses my forehead. Then Katie is back with our first course.

I don’t have time to dwell on the intimate gesture or the fact no one was around to see it.

Morgan and I don’t really talk as we dip and munch. When the cheese is almost gone, we both sit back so we can have some room for our main course and then dessert.

“So,” I start, twirling my finger around the rim of my drink glass. “That’s Alyssa’s mom?”

Morgan nods. “That’s her, unfortunately.”

“That seems a bit harsh.” I don’t know why I feel the need to defend her.

He sighs. “You’re right. That was uncalled for, but I wasn’t lying when I said she hasn’t seen her in over a year.

She barely even answers Aly’s texts and calls.

It’s like she decided having a kid wasn’t what she wanted so she just abandoned her.

I’m upset because she’s hurting my daughter, and she doesn’t give a fuck. ”

My stomach plummets and tears threaten to spring to my eyes for Aly.

I don’t have a good relationship with my mom at all, but I can’t imagine being abandoned like that.

“That’s really, really shitty. I’m so sorry you and Aly have been dealing with that.

” I squeeze his arm in what I hope is a comforting gesture.

“Thank you, it’s not easy to watch Aly feel like she’s not loved.

My mom and sisters try their best to be there for her and give her all the girl time they can, but it’s not the same.

And it’s hard to not be able to celebrate or commiserate Aly’s highs and lows with a partner who loves Aly as much as I do, you know? ”

“I don’t know, honestly. I was never far enough along to get to that point.” I slap a hand over my mouth, cursing the lack of filter on me. This isn’t about me right now, it’s about him!

Morgan’s eyebrows knit together, and he turns his body to face me in our little booth, grabbing my hand. “I’m not going to pry about that, especially right now, but just know I’m sorry.”

I blink back tears at the sincerity in his voice. Not many people know about the miscarriages, but everyone always says the same thing.

“They’re in a better place.”

“They were too pure for this Earth.”

“They’ll be waiting for you in the Celestial Kingdom.”

What people don’t realize is those things don’t mean much, especially when you’re like me and aren’t sure there’s an afterlife. I don’t know if I’ll get to see my babies again. And how can there be a better place than in my arms? Does the God Mormons believe in not find me worthy to have a child?

When Liam told me it was my fault for not being worthy enough to carry a child, I took it to heart and doubled down on being the “perfect” member. I did the service, I read my scriptures, I prayed twice a day on my knees, and still, nothing was good enough.

I realize now maybe it wasn’t me who was unworthy of having a child. Maybe if God is real, he was just showing me Liam’s true colors so I wouldn’t be stuck with a narcissistic asshole for eternity.

The fact Morgan didn’t fill me with fake platitudes or hollow words means more than he will ever know.

“Thank you. It’s still really fresh and hard to discuss, but hopefully someday I’ll be ready to talk about it.” I give him a sad smile and squeeze the hand holding mine.

“I hope one day you’ll see how incredibly strong I think you are, Han. I hope one day you’ll trust me.”

I don’t tell him that I already kind of do trust him. The fact scares the ever-loving shit out of me.

I just hope my trust isn’t misplaced.