Page 17 of Just Heartbeats (Royalla Motorcycle Club #1)

Roma told herself the reason for walking into the garage was to give Kodiak the info she'd pulled from the DMV, but if she was honest with herself, it was the fifth time she'd "happened" to check in with him today.

Once, about the Ford van that was brought in overnight.

Then, she'd imagined him wanting a cup of coffee.

Of course, she had to tell him it was time for lunch.

On her last break, she asked him if he'd like her to deep-clean the office.

Each time, she'd caught a flicker of something from him, but it vanished so fast she couldn't decipher what he was thinking.

He didn't look up when she entered, just grunted and stayed bent over the open hood of a gutted Honda. Today, even the bolts, grease, and engines were getting more attention than her.

"I've got the Escalade details," she said, voice firmer than she felt. "Do you want me to put in the paperwork for a lost title?"

"Nah, not yet." He motioned toward the wall. "Put it on the board."

"That's it?" She folded the printouts in half. "No thanks for using the whole day to chase down a VIN that was missing the last two numbers?"

"Thanks." He pulled on the side panel, breaking it loose from the frame.

She rolled her eyes at his back. Yesterday, he'd given her the stars, the moon, and the closest experience she's ever had to feeling a boy, a man, touch her. And today, he acted like it wasn't a big deal to him.

If this was how men and women acted after they hooked up in the clubhouse, then why would they keep doing it? Where was the pleasure in ignoring what happened?

Roma stepped forward and leaned against the car, staying within his peripheral vision. When he still wouldn't look at her, she traced her finger along the tattoo on his bicep.

He stiffened. Not dramatically, as if her touch disgusted him, but the tightening in his shoulders and stiffening in his spine were obvious. Something about her had him on guard.

"I need to talk to you," she asked quietly.

"There's nothing to talk about."

"Of course there is." She paused, and when he refused to look at her, she said, "Kodiak?"

He finally turned his head, eyes sharp but tired. "Don't."

"You keep saying that like it'll stop me from talking." She leaned closer. "You're the only one that I have. Don't stop being you. Don't treat me differently because—"

"You want me to spell it out for you?" he snapped. "What happened yesterday shouldn't have happened. It won't happen again. And it doesn't matter how close you stand, or how many times you grab my arm, or lean over my shoulder like you don't know what you're doing, I'm not going to touch you."

Roma's throat went dry in shock. Then, a flood of adrenaline warmed her.

"So you did notice me today," she said, softer now. "Good."

He stepped back like she'd slapped him, running a hand through his hair, smearing grease through already-messy strands.

"I notice everything when it comes to you." He lifted his gaze and locked in on her. "That's the damn problem."

Her heart skipped. He looked wrecked by the confession. She wasn't a disease.

She took a step forward. "I'm not gonna apologize for wanting you. I want to do more with you."

Kodiak swore under his breath and moved to the other side of the car. She followed.

He ran his hand underneath the wheel well. Tension rolled off him, making his breathing uneven.

Her fingers lightly brushed his forearm, testing to see if he'd get mad. When he let her continue, she moved up his arm, slowly and deliberately, until her palm rested above his elbow. He looked at her. She lifted her brows, knowing he felt what she was feeling.

"Are you going to ignore me?" she asked.

He dipped his chin. "What's happening between us will go away. It has to."

"You're making it more complicated than it is."

"I'm forty-five years old." He shook his head. "You're a kid compared to me. What do you think the Royalla members would think if I hooked up with you?"

She reached up and tucked a stray lock of hair behind his ear. "Look at the hoppers that come to the club to fuck the guys. They're not much older than me. Do you think they'll even care?"

"Fuck, yeah, they'll care. You're not a hopper. You're Chopper's daughter." He straightened to his full height, displacing her hand. "We're going to forget what happened."

He looked away, jaw tight like he was grinding the truth into dust.

She stood slowly and headed toward the door. But before stepping out, she paused and glanced over her shoulder.

"I'll be around," she said quietly. "You know where to find me. Or grab my arm. Or lean a little too close. Like you don't know what you're doing."

She let the truth echo behind her. If he wanted to think she'd created the attraction going on between them, then he was a fool. He'd done his share of flirting and touching, too. She didn't have to be forty years old to understand that he wanted her.

She walked outside without a clear plan, except that she needed her ten-minute break before returning to work. Kodiak had her on a roller coaster. One minute talking as if they had something together, and the next ignoring her.

He was in denial. How could she stop wanting more from him? She couldn't care less what anyone in Royalla thought of her getting involved with Kodiak. They all knew he was her guardian.

She blew out her breath and checked her watch. Her heart rate was one hundred. Kodiak always worked her into a mood. She paced, knowing she'd get more than ten thousand steps today.

The compound was quiet this time of day. Most of the guys were out on errands or sprawled inside waiting for the next ride order. A few bikes sat in the sun, the chrome glinting in the late afternoon heat.

Only three others were working in the garage with Kodiak. From what she'd overheard, most of the regulars were up all night partying.

"Hey," a voice called out. "You good?"

She turned to find Nate leaning against the handrail near the clubhouse steps, arms crossed, sunglasses pushed up into his hair.

"Yeah." She pointed behind her. "I need a break from the office."

He studied her for a beat. Nate wasn't the kind of guy who pushed or got into anyone's business. He was laid-back and always the first to crack a joke. But today, he looked suspicious.

"You and Kodiak," he said finally. "Did something go sideways?"

Roma blinked. "What? No."

Nate gave her a slow, skeptical look. "You sure?"

She scoffed. "I don't know why you'd ask that."

"Uh-huh." He nodded like he didn't believe a word of it. "Just saying, Prez has been off for a few days now—more than usual. Won't say why, but he's snapping at people who don't even deserve it. And he's only like that when shit is going down."

Roma's stomach turned. "Maybe he's got club stuff on his mind."

"Maybe." Nate tapped her under the chin. "Or maybe someone finally got under his skin."

She looked over at the open garage bay, unable to see Kodiak. If others were noticing, perhaps that's why he was trying to put the brakes on. She sighed. A little late now. He'd seen her pussy. He'd made her orgasm.

Nate pushed off the railing, stretching his arms behind his head. "You don't have to tell me anything. I figured you should know that I'm not the only one who's noticed something's off."

With that, he walked toward the door of the clubhouse, leaving Roma alone with his observation.

She stayed there for another minute, maybe two, until she decided there wasn't anything she could do to make it easier on Kodiak. Despite the age gap, they were both adults. If they wanted to get sexual, then that was nobody's business.

Maybe having sex would improve Kodiak's mood. She walked back into the garage and straight to the office. The desk chair creaked as she sat down. She leaned forward slightly, enough to see through the doorway into the first bay. The angle gave her a clear view of Kodiak.

He was crouched beside a Harley. His jaw set in that familiar hard expression under his beard so that it created wrinkles at the corners of his eyes. Roma planted her elbows on the desk and rested her chin in her hand, content to watch.

If he'd looked up right then, he would've seen her. Maybe even understood what she wasn't saying out loud. But he didn't.

He stayed focused on his job as if the clang of wrenches and the high-pitched hum of the compressor filling with air were enough to let him escape his problems.

She wasn't sure how long she stayed there, staring through the doorway like a girl daydreaming to escape reality. Time no longer mattered when her heart was breaking.