Page 11 of Jordan’s Breakthrough (Unexpected Love #3)

“I can at least manage my bills now. And I don’t drink as much as I used to. Still smoke weed occasionally, but I’m not a total fuck up.” His voice lowers even more, so much it’s barely audible. “I have never been as bad as I was after Graham died. Like, I was bad. Really bad.”

Something in his expression makes me think he was suicidal, but he continues on before I can ask.

“I think that’s why I jumped at the chance to help with the bar. It gave me something else to focus on. Not that it helped. I still spiraled.” He scoffs suddenly, then reaches for something. He shows me a crocheted mouse. “These dumb things helped more than a job ever did.”

My heart warms, but I still feel for him. I pull my other knee up, holding the phone out in front of me. I desperately long to touch Jordan. To hold him and take away his pain. He’s so burdened.

“Anyway, Declan and Piper eventually encouraged me to get checked out, so I did. They started treatment right away.”

“How did it go?”

Two years isn’t a long time in the medical sense, especially for mental illnesses. It can take years to find the right medication, and even longer to find the right dose or see the change. Most people give up too early, thinking it’s not helping.

Maybe Jordan is still figuring out his medication, and if so, he really shouldn’t be going anywhere or doing anything drastic. He needs to be taking care of himself.

“My therapist says routines are important,” he continues, avoiding my question about the meds. “They give me familiarity and something to cling to. So traveling… I don’t know. It just feels impossible now.”

“I get that. I’m sorry I suggested it. I shouldn’t have. I’m just glad you’re getting help. That’s what’s important. Forget I said anything, okay?”

“I don’t want to, though. I don’t want to forget any of it! My dream, my writing. It shouldn’t be taken away just because of some goddamn illness.”

“I know, but maybe now isn’t—”

“Then when will it be, huh? Because I feel like I’m caged, Miles! Like this thing is holding me back. I can’t write. I can’t go anywhere. I can barely function. All I do is work and come home to my cat. What kind of life is that?”

I chew my lip, unsure of what to say. My eyes burn. He’s making me want to cry. Not because he’s hurting me—because I’m hurting for him. He’s right, he deserves the same freedom everyone else has. The same joy. Not to be trapped by invisible limitations.

And to lose someone he loves too? God. I can’t even imagine. Jordan has been through so much.

“You’re right. It’s not fair,” I say. “It’s absolutely not fair that you have to deal with this when others don’t.

But this isn’t the finish line, Jordan. You just started.

You’ll figure it out, and until you do, I’ll be here, okay?

We can keep video chatting and being friends.

Because I really do like talking to you.

Knowing this about you doesn’t change that. ”

He exhales hard, then his shoulders relax. “I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t apologize.”

“I didn’t mean to blow up like that. Sometimes it’s just… Anyway, I really like talking to you too. You’re definitely a bright spot in my life right now.”

I smile. “Can I just say one more thing, though?”

He waits.

“I think you’re incredibly brave to admit all this to me. And to admit you needed help when you did. When you were at that low point.”

He scoffs and looks away.

“I’m serious. I see a lot of people who refuse treatment, then they come back when their problems are much worse. You did the right thing.”

“Yeah, well. I wish it was sooner. Maybe if my dad would’ve listened to me, I—”

“You can’t think like that. It doesn’t matter what happened in the past. It matters that you’re getting help now, ” I say firmly.

“Focus on that and what you can do to move forward.” I’m slipping into nurse mode, so I take a deep breath to regroup.

Jordan doesn’t need a caregiver. He needs a friend.

“Like I said, I’m here for you. You’re my friend, Jordan, and I care for you. ”

He finally peers up at me. “It really would be fun to visit you someday.”

I grin. “Wouldn’t it? We’d have so much fun. There’s a fun plant store we could visit here, or I could take you to the craft store. We could watch movies and crochet together.”

He smirks. “All that sounds undeniably sexy. I need to leave, like right now.”

I snort. Sexy. Right.

I drop my knees and reach for the owl again and hold it up for him. “Speaking of crochet.”

“Have you been working on that this whole time?”

“Off and on.”

“Let me see it.”

I spread it out on the bed, then show Jordan.

“Holy shit, that’s huge!”

“That’s what he said,” I tease.

Jordan bursts out laughing. “Mm-hmm. I’ve been told that too, you know.”

I flip the camera again and gape at him. “Oh my god, Jordan. I was kidding!”

He smirks. “I wasn’t. It is huge.”

I freeze. “You shouldn’t tease a man like that. It’s not nice.”

He grins again. “Maybe I’m not teasing.”

Where the fuck did this playfulness come from? Did Jordan just need to get stuff off his chest?

“Why does it not surprise me that you have a huge dick? Literally everything else about you is perfect. Of course you’d have a huge dick.”

“Perfect, huh?” He makes a mocking sound.

“I mean, have you looked in a mirror? You’re fucking hot, Jordan!”

“Mmm, well, I think you’re pretty hot too.”

I can’t help but roll my eyes. I’ve been called many things, but hot isn’t one of them. Usually it’s fat, chubby, or pale as a ghost. Never hot.

“Miles?” Jordan says after a moment.

“Hmm?”

He lowers his voice. “Thank you for this. Being here, I mean. Listening. I truly do feel better.”

My heart warms. “Of course.”

“I better go, though. I still need to shower before our family day.”

Family day with his chosen family. Does he even know how special that is?

“Fine, if you’re not going to show me this big dick of yours,” I say flatly. “I suppose I can let you go.”

“Oh, you want to see it, do you?”

I grin. “I mean, yeah. After all that teasing? You could at least let me watch you in the shower or something. It’s only fair.”

He pauses. “I could, if you want.”

My eyes widen. “What? I was kidding!”

“No, you weren’t.” Jordan leans in, chewing his lip.

Yeah, maybe I wasn’t. I really do want to see him.

“Do you want to watch, Miles?”

I swallow hard. Sweet lemon Hi-chews. Please don’t let this be a joke. “I mean, if you’re offering…”

He arches a brow. “Yeah?”

“You’d really let me?”

“Only if you return the favor someday. I might not get hard for you, but I’d always like to see it.”

My belly squirms. “Oh, I’ll happily return the favor whenever you want. Tonight even.”

He smirks. “Alright. Deal.”

The phone jostles, and I catch glimpses of the ceiling before it changes to another texture. A bright light overhead flicks on, blinding me for a moment before Jordan props the phone against something.

He steps aside, then adjusts the angle until the shower fills my screen. The stall is full size, which is not what I expected for a motorhome. Then again, everything in his RV looks nice, like he has a higher end model. Which makes sense if he was going to live in it.

The shower door is crystal clear, no privacy texture. Which means I really will be able to see everything.

Jeepers.

Jordan steps back and mutters, “Here goes nothing.”

My jaw drops when he shoves his underwear down. Damnnn. He wasn’t kidding. He does have a large cock, and it’s not even fully hard, either.

Jordan tugs it a few times, turning to give me the full side view before reaching in to turn the shower on. It’s a long few minutes before he steps in though.

As in, a long, long few minutes.

The entire time, Jordan strokes himself, teasing his balls and making himself—and me—hard.

“Enjoying the view?” he asks.

“You have no idea,” I mumble.

He bends in front of the camera. “Show me how much.”

I yank the blanket back, revealing myself, fully erect. For once, I don’t care about my round belly.

My cock throbs as I pump, creamy liquid leaking from the tip.

“So fucking beautiful,” he murmurs. “Don’t be shy while I’m in the shower, okay?”

He gets in.

Honestly, it’s hard to see much on the tiny screen, and droplets against the glass blur the image, but I can still make out his silhouette. His long dark hair stands out against everything else, clinging to his wet back as he washes, and I can see the curve of his ass as he turns.

When he’s done, he braces one hand on the glass and turns toward his phone, wiping away the condensation. He must’ve taken a cold shower, because there is no steam.

And he hadn’t wiped the condensation away from his face, no. He revealed a little window, leaving his dick in plain view.

I whimper as Jordan strokes himself, slowly then with more finesse. He’s murmuring things I can’t hear, putting on a full show.

My balls ache. I spread my legs and jack harder, lust surging through my system. It has been weeks since I’ve touched myself, and even longer—way, way longer—since I’ve done it with anyone else.

He groans loudly, dropping his head back as his hand flies even faster. Seconds later, white liquid splatters on the glass.

I freeze. Did he just… wow.

The shower shuts off, then Jordan brushes the water off his skin before stepping out and reaching for a towel. He doesn’t cover himself. Instead, he tosses it over one shoulder and leans forward to look at the camera.

“Like the show?”

“Uh-huh.”

“You gonna come for me too?”

My hand flies again, and I bite my lower lip, stifling a moan.

“That’s it. Let me see you, Miles.”

I angle the camera to give him a better view, face heating. I hadn’t cared about my belly a few minutes ago, but now that he’s watching so closely…

I shift to hide my stomach.

“Damn, you have a nice dick. Show me your head.”

I do.

He hums. “Come for me. Let me watch.”

With him talking to me like that, it doesn’t take long. “Ugh, Jordan!”

His soft chuckle makes me shiver. He’d definitely liked that.

I take a shuddering breath and look at him again. “That was…”

“Unexpected?” he offers when I trail off. “Hot as fuck? Sexy? Invigorating? The best idea you’ve had yet?” he continues, throwing words out there. Then he lowers his voice. “And, I can only say this for me, but… it was the best damn thing I’ve experienced in a long time. So thank you.”

His compliment warms me.

My skin is flushed, and I doubt I look even a fraction as sexy as he is. “Yeah. Same.”

His smile fades a little. “I’ve really got to go. But we’ll talk again soon, okay?”

“Yeah. Okay.”

He hangs up, and I let my head fall back against the wall with a clunk.

I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: I’m so totally screwed.