Page 47 of Jonas (Silver Team #4)

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

“Thank God you’re okay!” Kira exclaimed the moment I carried Derrika through the front door of the cabin.

I loved KK like a sister, but fuck me, I could take no more, and her excited screech pushed me closer to the edge.

The only thing that had kept me from flying apart was the weight of Derrika in my arms—the place she’d been since I picked her up, put her in the backseat of the Escalade, then shifted her onto my lap and held her all the way to the farm.

She said not a word when I pulled the seatbelt around both of us.

When she rested her head on my shoulder and sighed, I knew she needed the closeness as much as I did.

The drive back was mostly silent, with only a few quiet exchanges between Lore and Cash.

And Cash drove us home like a cautious granny—no swerving, no speeding, no aggressive maneuvers.

I’d never again bitch about his driving.

It was because of him, we’d hit that auto shop in time.

Another few minutes and we would’ve been too late.

So close.

Too fucking close.

I’d been minutes away from losing everything I ever wanted, losing the woman who was born to be mine.

Minutes.

And the fuck of it was, I’d driven her to that bitch, then sat outside while she was being kidnapped. I was right outside talking to Easton when Natalie, Keith, and Jun De had walked her out the back door.

It was because of me, the side of her face was swollen and already turning green and purple. It was my fault her ankles were bleeding. I was responsible for her hands being tied behind her back and her shoulder dislocated.

Me.

I did that to her.

“Bring her in here,” Nebraska ordered, pointing to the kitchen. “I have everything ready.”

I ignored Natalie and turned toward the living room.

“Jonas, I need?—”

“Let him do what he needs to do,” Cash gently admonished Natalie.

I grunted my gratitude.

Derrika shifted. Her hand came up. Palm to my cheek, she whispered, “Honey, I’m okay.”

She wasn’t okay, she was fucking bleeding and bruised and there was no telling when the day’s events would sneak up on her and fuck with her head.

I lowered my ass to the couch as gently as I could, leaned back, and tightened my hold just in case Derrika got it in her head to move off my lap.

I understood her play walking out of that garage, needing to leave on her own two feet by her free will after she’d been forced to be somewhere she didn’t want to be. But now, she wasn’t moving.

Nebraska approached like she was advancing on a wild animal primed to attack. “She’s bleeding.”

I clenched my jaw at the reminder.

“I need to clean her ankles,” she continued softly.

“Want some bourbon?” Lore offered. “It’ll help with the pain.”

That edge I was riding was becoming precarious.

“Tequila would be better,” Derrika answered.

“I’ll see what they have.”

I didn’t see Lore leave the living room, primarily because my eyes were fixed on the wall in front of me, too afraid if I moved my gaze my temper would flare out of control.

There was jostling.

I stared at the wall.

There was shifting.

I stared at the wall.

I heard Derrika’s shoes hit the floor.

I stared at the wall.

I heard her suck in a pain-filled breath.

I stared at the wall.

“Doesn’t look too bad,” Nebraska said.

Her conversational tone made the throbbing in my neck intensify.

A bottle of open tequila appeared. “Here.”

Derrika accepted the bottle, put it to her lips, and tipped her head back.

“Thanks,” she wheezed.

“Take one more, then I’ll clean this up.”

Derrika’s head tipped back again, then she handed off the bottle.

And I could take no more.

I started to lift Derrika off my lap but her hand fisted my shirt.

“Don’t,” she pleaded. “I’m exactly where we both need me to be.”

“Derrika,” I warned.

“Do not Derrika me, Jonas. None of this is your fault. Or mine. And two of the people responsible are very dead, and the third is going to have a worse night than I had.”

“Dee Dee,” I tried again.

“No, Jonas. We promised honesty. This is me being honest. I need you to put aside whatever you’re feeling and give me this.

Later, after I’ve showered away the shit of my day, then I’ll put in the effort to convince you, none of this is your fault.

I know it won’t help, but I’m still going to try.

Then we’re going to get into bed, and we’re going to be grateful that you, Cash, and Lore got to me in time.

Tomorrow, I’ll put in more work, and the next day, and the next, until you finally believe me that I’m okay and you are not to blame for any of what happened. ”

Fuck .

I could argue she was wrong, that if I’d only gone into that pub with her she would not have been taken.

But there was no use. Just like she could try and absolve me until the end of days and I would never be free of blame.

That was my cross to bear. Not hers, and I’d keep that burden to myself so she didn’t feel the weight of it.

I settled back and relaxed.

“Thank you.”

Good Christ, she was killing me.

I dipped my gaze and was met with the sight of beautiful blue eyes full of concern—for me.

“So brave.”

“I’m not. I was scared.”

“Fear has nothing to do with bravery,” Lore interjected. “True courage is facing your fear, embracing it, and standing strong in the face of it. And girl, you were standing strong when we got there.”

I knew Derrika was going to argue. Before she could, I dropped my mouth to hers and did what I should’ve done the moment I found her. Her lips tasted like heaven, like a promise, but most importantly, they tasted like the sweet reminder of the future.

Derrika’s cuts were cleaned and glued. Penny had joined us in the living room but was giving Cash and Lore a wide berth. Kira had gone back down to the basement after Zane sent Natalie and Keith’s prints and clear images for her to run. He’d bring back DNA, but Kira was eager to get a head start.

I’d yet to allow Derrika to move, not that she’d attempted to get off my lap, and after she rightfully scolded me for having my head up my ass I understood why—she was where she wanted to be.

Lore had the bottle of tequila, Nebraska was giving her friend the side-eye. Lore was ignoring the censure and continued to take nips. I had a feeling Lore could handle her drink. She didn’t strike me as a woman who lost control—ever—but most especially around people she barely knew.

“Where’s Nixon and his crew?” I asked.

“They left about ten minutes before you rolled up. POTUS changed his mind, Gemini’s handling Ryan Clarkson. He wants answers before he makes a public statement and he realized that the less-than-legal option would get him what he needs quicker.”

He wasn’t wrong .

Another step closer to shutting this shit down. Not that the damage wasn’t already done, but we still needed to stop the hemorrhaging.

“So,” Lore started. “You’re part of the high school dropout club, too, huh? Best parting shot ever, by the way.”

“Yeah,” Derrika uncaringly admitted. “I left home a few months before I graduated. After I turned eighteen I took my GED. You?”

There was hesitation and another swig of tequila, but shockingly, Lore answered, “Same. Minus the GED. Life taught me more than any classroom could.”

I glanced at Cash. His face was a mask of indifference, but I knew him well enough to know he not only understood but felt Lore’s sentiment to the deepest depths of his soul.

“I hear that, sister.”

“Easton texted me,” Nebraska announced. “They’re bringing Jun De to the shed. He wants Cash and Lore to meet him back there. And Theo and Smith took over looking for Rutte. They have him in their sights, they should have him in custody within the hour.”

“Go-time,” Lore chirped and put the bottle on the table.

Cash clapped his hands and rubbed them together.

“Is this when we call in the dentist?” Derrika asked.

“No, darlin’, this is when Jun De Chen learns why Cash is King.”

Good Christ, here we go.

“Do you have a tiara and royal mantle and everything?” Lore joked.

“No, baby girl, all I need is my scepter. But if you’d like to play princess, I can get you a tiara.”

“How about this? You call me baby girl one more time, and I’ll shove that rod up your ass.”

“You sure do know how to turn a man on.”

“You’d be smart to remember, I also know how to make a man weep.”

“I’ll file that away.” Cash wiped the smirk off his face and turned his attention to Derrika. “Hate to ask, now, but I have to. Did they give you anything while they were holding you?”

Derrika blew out a breath and shook her head.

Then she gave us a play-by-play of everything that happened, including how she got the bruise on her jaw and the cuts on her ankles.

When she was done, I hoped like fuck it was my bullet that put that motherfucker Keith down.

It was Lore who adjusted and put two nonlethal shots in Jun De Chen.

Which after hearing what Derrika had gone through, I knew she wished she hadn’t exhibited the self-control.

But we needed him alive for questioning.

After that…

He was fair game.

“Smart play, baby,” I told her.

“I needed to buy time, but I could’ve gone without watching.” She stopped and shook her head. “Just that it was gross and we’d have more if Jun De hadn’t killed Natalie.”

As far as I was concerned, he’d saved us the trouble of disposing of the bitch.

I made a mental note to keep a close watch for any signs of flashbacks or PTSD. That shit crept up on you, normally at the most unexpected times.

“Let me grab my bag of tricks,” Lore said and jogged out of the room.

“Cash,” Nebraska called.

I could see the look she was giving him, but whatever he saw, he understood.

“I got it.” He nodded.

Derrika patted my arm, and when she had my attention, she asked, “Do you want to go with them? I can stay here until you get back.”

“Nope. I’m with you.”

“But—”

“Dee Dee, I’m not leaving you. They don’t need me, but I need you.”

A ghost of a smile played on her lips and I was happy to see it.

“Okay.”

“Though we’re not staying here. I’m taking you back to our cabin.”

Another smile, this one more pronounced, and I liked it a fuckuva lot more.

“Okay.”

“Ready!” Penny announced, stopping at the front door. “You coming?”

Cash’s answer was to stand.

And right before he closed the door behind him and Lore, he shouted, “Cash is King.”

“I don’t know why that’s so amusing, but it is,” Derrika chuckled.

“Yeah, he’s amusing, all right,” I returned.

Amusing to hide all of the trauma he tries to forget .

“More like a ticking time bomb ready to explode,” Nebraska muttered. “One day, humor will no longer be enough to keep the devil at bay.”

She wasn’t wrong.

“What’s his story?” Penny asked.

Shit. I forgot the woman was in the room.

Nebraska’s startled gaze landed on me. She’d forgotten, too. Slowly, she peeled her eyes from me, and they moved to Penny.

With a soft smile and gentle voice to take the sting out, she said, “Sorry. It’s not mine to tell.”

“Right. Sorry. I shouldn’t’ve asked. Not my business.”

“You said he looked like someone you knew,” Derrika reminded her. “But you didn’t say who that was.”

“My…um…someone I knew but he died a long time ago. Anyway, I should go help Kira.”

With that, Penny scuttled away.

“That was weird, right?”

“Yeah, baby, weird.”

She was definitely hiding something. And whatever that was didn’t matter as long as she stayed away from Cash.