Page 32 of Icy Heart, Empty Chest

“ C ora, wake up,” Damien said urgently.

I fly up at his tone. Post coital cuddling had led to falling asleep, nude.

“Someone’s in your house.” He had pulled pants back on and was looking around my room. “You don’t have a gun, do you?”

“Gods, no,” I hissed. “Wait a sec. I think I know who this is,”

“Seriously? It’s twelve in the morning.” An annoyed look crossed his face.

I wrap myself in the long purple bathrobe.

“I promise you it’s OK. Stay put,” I insisted and walked out of my bedroom.

Finneas is sitting in my kitchen, looking lumpy but immaculate in a well-tailored charcoal suit.

“You haven’t been answering my messages, kid.” His gravelly voice is such a contrast to Dae’s dulcet voice. I’m a bit surprised. Thought he would have dropped in sooner.

I roll my eyes and go to the fridge for a water. Water first and shower second.

“No. I haven’t. There was something else that took priority, unfortunately.”

He tenses. “I’ve been hearing a lot of weird things lately involving you.” Awesome.

“I can probably verify most of them,” I say casually. I’ve been the definition of a liability.

Damien, ignoring my request, wanders out to my side, fully dressed.

His face is a mix of cool lethality with distrust. My Damien, the sunny, jubilant man is gone and in his place is this protective stranger.

I get the distinct impression that he’s guarding me, expecting this conversation to go off the rails.

Just because I’m alright with this intruder, doesn’t mean that he is and he does not like it.

Finneas may look cool on the outside but I know he’s ready to bolt. There’s a slight pinch around his eyes that gives it away. I sigh. The jig is up.

“This is what I’ve been up to the last two weeks.”

Finneas wrinkles his nose. “Your sex life never got in the way of work, kid.” Rude. My nonexistent sex life before now?

Damien bristles next to me and I put an arm out, gesturing to the couch. I join him there.

“Not like that, jackass. This is the heart’s original owner.”

Finneas’s eyes flick to Damien, sizing him up. Damien’s been doing the same. All the warmth in his eyes is gone, replaced with flint. Damien’s close to me, ready to move if needed. With the reveal that it was Damien’s own heart, Finneas’s eyes bulge a bit.

“Ah.” My fence is unsure. Why wouldn’t he be? I’ve never mangled a job this badly before, never stole from a client, never slept with a mark. I can see the wheels in his head turning, trying to figure out why my judgment went so astray.

“Look, I’ve known him since I was a kid. I didn’t know the heart was his. But he reached out to get it back and get it put back in.” I was trying to condense the insanity of the last few weeks into a few sentences or less. Finneas was having none of it.

“How did he know that you had a hand in the original movement?” The distrust seemed to be spreading rapidly.

“He suspected,” I emphasized, “because he’s Magical Forces.” The air dropped several degrees between where he and I sat and the tension ballooned out into the room.

My fence’s eyes glowed angrily. “You’ve been burned for how long and you didn’t tell me?

And especially by them?” His words came out quietly but the obvious betrayal was roaring.

The blood was pulsating in my ears. I was clearly on dangerous ground.

It goes without saying but those with a background in thievery or other illegal activity tend to have had bad interactions with law enforcement.

I never met one who didn’t have a chip on their shoulder.

I glared back just as angrily. “He went to Filla to get it taken out in the first place, do you really think he’s going to turn himself in? No one is that self-sacrificing.”

“No idea. I don’t like this, kid. You should have kept me in the loop,” he pressed. “Especially Daemon Whithorn’s son.”

“You knew my father?” asked Damien.

“Who around this town didn’t?” replied Finneas snarkily.

I threw Finneas a look. “I’ve known you a long time.

You knew my father and his. He hated his own father as much as he loved mine.

I think you’re both trying to protect me in your own ways but you both need to take a few steps back.

Plus, he helped me finagle quite a few illegal things that could land us both in jail for a while in the search for his heart.

If he rats me out, then we both face ten to fifteen years.

I didn’t betray you. Damien didn’t know you existed till you broke in. ”

I see Finneas’s eye wrinkles subtly relax more.

“You still should have told me.” The words felt harsh. I’d relied on him for so long. He’d brought me back and forth to court, ordered me food occasionally, given me some support, as well as access to money. Still, I had to see this one through on my own.

“Yes but I was between a rock and a hard place. I knew I’d need resources, at least to finish this through.” Not to mention, the fewer who knew about this, the better.

“How much did the crystal cost you?” I’m not sure how he knew but I shouldn’t be surprised.

“The price was fair,” I said sharply. “I don’t regret it.”

Damien reaches out to take my hand. Finneas doesn’t miss it.

“You’re in deep, huh, kid?”

“She has a name, you know,” interjects Damien.

I squeeze his hand and raise my eyebrow to him. “You wouldn’t be here without him. Chill, please.” I turn back to Finneas.

“Since I’ve been burned so thoroughly, I guess it’s as good a time as any to announce my retirement. I’m getting out.”

There were a few moments of measured silence while both Damien and Finneas could process.

He regards me cooly. “You know this is permanent. No favors or frantic phone calls.”

“I know. I’m done. Going in a different way. This isn’t what he would have wanted and I don’t need the money anymore.” A solemn look crosses his eyes at the mention of my father. A pang erupts in my chest.

He knows I’m right. Dad was always about doing everything on your own merit, not taking shortcuts. I can’t imagine what he’d say if he had known what I was doing after his death. I had my reasons but now they just seem irrelevant. Damien coming back into my life pretty much blasted them all away.

Finneas plants his stubby legs on the ground and nods with finality.

“You know where to find me. Take care of yourself, kid.” He makes his way towards my door and goes through it without another word.

I get up and lock it behind him.

“Were all of your contacts that intense?” hedged Damien. His body language was still tense.

I laugh. “Oh gods no. But be respectful please. Even if he’s a criminal, he was a big reason I was able to survive the last decade.”

Damien held up his hands. His cold protective doppelg?nger was gone.

“I was just hoping I wasn’t heading into a shoot-out unarmed.”

“Not quite his style. Picking the lock and dropping in, absolutely.”

“I cannot stress how much I dislike that,” he says and pulls me into his arms.

“I doubt it’ll happen again. Truly. I think I may have burned my last illegal bridge.”

“I hope not. If we’re sleeping in the same bed and anyone gets through your door, they’re getting shot.”

“Cool it there, trigger. I doubt anyone in any underground circles is going to touch me with a ten-foot pole after all this. I’ll be back to being a lowly barista albeit with a super-hot boyfriend.” I thought for a second. “Marie might stab me though.”

He chuckled. “She can try.”

I untangled from his arms and wandered into the kitchen. I can’t even describe how good it felt to be back in his arms, to be held and protected, appreciated.

“Coffee or beer?”

“Probably beer.” Damien slid into the seat that Finneas vacated. “You do have other options, you know?”

“Hmm?”

“Look, someone I went to the academy with dropped out to go to the Healer’s Guild. I can put you in contact with her if you want,” he said as he sipped. “It would be a change and as much as I love seeing you in the apron handing me my coffee, it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.”

I snorted. “I will consider it in the morning when I’m not blinded by dick lust and the fact that I just gave up a very lucrative gig.”

“Cora, I’d pay for it myself, I have the money. Consider it your retainer fee. However, tell me more about this dick lust?”

Smiling seductively, I pulled the tie on the robe and started to walk back to the bedroom, dropping it to the ground in my wake.

I came out of the bathroom later and looked at my bed with a silly smile. He was here, in my bed, casually running his hands back through his hair. I slid under the covers and wrapped my arms around his torso.

“Well hey there,” he said in a low tone.

“Mine,” I said with a squeeze.

“Yes, Cor. All yours. And you’re mine too.” I smiled. This was heaven.

He turned on his side to face me. There was still some low light illuminating our faces.

“You’re an amazing woman, Cor.”

I snorted. “Me? What’d I do?”

“The last two weeks you’ve been cleaning up after me, forming plans, getting in places, listening to my bullshit. You forgave me. You let me back in, love.” Even in the post coital afterglow, the word “love” had me beaming.

“I couldn’t help it. It was you.” I put a hand on his neck. “You opened me back up again.”

He glanced down to my legs and I laughed. “Pervert.”

He drew me closer and took on a seductive tone. “I told you I’d dreamed of us together. I didn’t say how many times I dreamed it.” His fingers drifted down to the small of my back and then splayed over my behind.

“I’d frequently wake up rock hard, dreaming of having you in so many ways, all till you cried out my name. I’ve wanted you, your smile and sass for a while. Getting all of this,” he added, grasping my ass firmly, “was just a bonus to the dream come true.”

“How often?” I asked coyly.

“Weekly.”

“I feel stupid in a way,” I admitted. “I could have had you for years.”

“No, Cora,” he said firmly. “Don’t go down that path. I don’t want any regrets at all between us.”

I nodded. It did feel a bit like a fairytale.

“I may have dreamed about you occasionally as well,” I blushed.

“Oh?” That smirk of his.

“Of course. Have you seen your reflection? And,” I said, letting a deep breath out, “you always had a way of smiling your way into every corner of my heart. Picked me up. Encouraged me. Listened.”

I wasn’t shocked at the depth of my feelings. I was shocked at myself for not having done anything about it for so long.

“I resisted you for so long and I didn’t have to,” I said, brushing a lock of his hair back. “You may have taken out your heart but I was the fool.”

He opened his mouth to argue but I put a finger over it. “Let me get this out.”

“I’m a hardheaded jackass who should have forgiven you a long time ago. Forgiven myself too,” I said, with a shrug. “I wish I had known years ago he was hurting you. Threatening you.”

“I’m not sure it would have made a difference, Cor.”

“I am. It would have made all the difference in the world. You tried to get to me, risking your own flesh. You tried so hard.” A tear slipped down my face. “Sounds terrible but I’m glad he’s gone.”

Damien nodded. “I can’t disagree.” A little time passed, just content in his arms before I spoke again.

“This still feels surreal, Dae.” I snuggled deep into his chest, the small hairs tickling against my face.

“I’m sure the bubble will burst when you realize that I snore or I’m terrible with laundry and that my cooking skills are abysmal.”

“I’m pretty sure I realized all of those things when I went into your house. The only problem I foresee is that we both suck at laundry.”

“I noticed your laundry chair; I have one too.”

I laughed. It was nice feeling this light hearted. Like I have something to look forward to for the first time in a while. It was amazing.

He suddenly pushed us apart slightly to look at my face with a pained expression on his face in sudden remembrance.

“I am sorry about your painting. Approximately how much did you pay for that crystal?”

I told him with a sour taste in my mouth and he whistled low. I had loved that one. One of my father’s favorites but I couldn’t take the risk of not bringing his fever down. I briefly thought back to him lying on the couch, unresponsive and soaking through towels and then shook it out of my mind.

His mouth curled into a ghost of a smile that he then tried to suppress.

I narrowed my eyes at him. “What’s that smile for?”

He let out a brief chuckle. “There was no need to spend that much on my heart, Cor. It was yours from the start.”

“Oh my gods you dramatic horse.” I rolled my eyes and flicked at his chest.

“The way I see it, we’re all even and starting at square one. I do have one extremely important and nonnegotiable request.”

“Oh?”

He kissed my forehead. “Make that French toast again for breakfast.”

“Deal. So…”

“So what?”

“So you’re my boyfriend now?”

“Of course I am. Go to sleep, little nymph.” He reached over and turned out the light.

I drifted off to sleep, the first of many days and nights sharing my pillow, bed and life with Damien.

That next morning, I made the all-important and nonnegotiable French toast. It was new and foreign to have him sit at my table but also equally important and irreplaceable.

It was incredibly odd; I had a purpose now where I really didn’t have one before.

He made me feel safe and above all, wanted beyond reason.

I forgave him and gave him (and his ass) my stamp of approval, which I think he wanted more than anything else.

He delighted in his devotion. He enjoyed the flowers, surprises and game nights and the blush they’d put on my face.

I enjoyed cooking for him but also teaching him, seeing him in the kitchen.

At our one-year anniversary, he made me a chocolate cake from scratch.

The middle was tragically undercooked but we ate the edges with the gobs of frosting that were left over.

For all the ups and downs in life, he made it better, consistently. Always had and always would.