Page 35 of Hunger in His Blood (Brides of the Kylorr #3)

CHAPTER 35

KALDUR

T he two sharp raps sounded on my study door.

“Come in.”

Maudoric appeared. She held the door open for the keeper I’d been waiting for, who appeared hesitant as she stepped into the room.

“You wished to see me, Kyzaire ?” came Velle’s voice after she cleared her throat.

“Yes,” I said, though I stayed seated at my desk.

The silence stretched out as I regarded her, and eventually she approached the curved edge of my desk after casting an uncertain look at Maudoric, lingering near the door.

My gaze went to my Head Keeper, who inclined her head briefly.

So she had it, I thought, my lips pressing tight, trying to keep the anger locked away. It had been pushing itself to the surface much too easily and readily this last month. I had to relearn keeping it controlled, though I would admit Erina’s presence certainly helped. Simply knowing she was in Vyaan, in my keep helped tremendously.

“You used to work for House Azola, did you not?” I asked .

Velle’s lips parted and said slowly, “Yes, a long time ago.”

“How long ago?” I asked, sliding my elbows across my desk, pinning her with a piercing look to keep her in place. “Humor me.”

“I…I would say four years ago now.”

“And how long did you work there?”

“Briefly,” she said.

“How long?” I asked, my tone clipped.

“Five months, Kyzaire .”

“So how is it that you work in House Azola for a mere five months, a handful of years ago, and yet you have more loyalty to that House than you do to mine, where you have worked for years and been treated well?”

Velle’s expression looked stricken. I thought she might’ve finally realized what this meeting was about.

I stood from my desk then. My wings threatened to flare, but I kept them tightly tucked, though they twitched with the effort as I rounded my desk to stand in front of her.

She stumbled back a few steps. “I am loyal to your House, Kyzaire .”

“What did Lydrasa offer you?” I asked.

Erina had had a serpent of a friend in this keeper…then again, I’d had one in Lydrasa.

“She didn’t offer me anything,” Velle said. “ Kyzaire , I don’t know what this is about. Please, I?—”

“What’s going on?” came a familiar voice from the open door. My thunderous glare flashed up, only to meet Erina’s wary eyes. She must’ve heard the rising voices.

Erina looked from Maudoric to Velle to me. I hadn’t seen her since the healer had attended to her this morning. She’d gone to her rooms to rest, saying that she’d been more fatigued than usual. It appeared she was just waking and had likely been on her way to find food in the kitchens.

“ Kyzaire ?” she prompted, and I nearly growled. I would need to speak with her about that. Even among company, my blood mate had no duty to use my title when she spoke to me.

“I’m merely asking Velle here a question,” I replied. “A question that would help answer the mystery of why she helped forge a letter in my hand and sent it to my pregnant kyrana in Laras.”

Erina didn’t look surprised, but she did step into the room, her eyes sweeping over her friend. Had she already figured that out? Why hadn’t she voiced her suspicions?

If Velle was surprised to see Erina returned, she didn’t show it. At least until her gaze landed on my mate’s growing belly. Then I saw her jerk in surprise.

“Did you do that?” Erina asked softly.

Velle’s gaze swung around to me. “No, you don’t understand. I?—”

“I believe she asked you that question,” I answered, tilting my head toward my mate.

The keeper dragged in a sharp breath and turned to look at her supposed friend. “You don’t understand.”

“Then help me understand,” Erina said quietly. She was much too patient, I realized. More patient than I would ever be. “What happened? You saw my letter come here, and then what?”

Maudoric reached out to squeeze Erina’s arm, as if in apology. She took her duties seriously here, and it was likely she felt responsible for what had happened.

Velle’s shoulders sagged. “We thought you were lying.”

Erina jerked. “Lying? About the baby?”

“Yes.”

“You and Lydrasa?” she asked to confirm.

Velle inclined her head with a tight jaw.

“You know me, Velle,” Erina said quietly, staring at her once friend. “You think I would be capable of everything you told him? You think I would lie to try to get money ?”

“Lydrasa convinced me that you were lying,” Velle said. “She said she had reports in Laras, that you were desperate for credits. She thought it was a ploy to get the Kyzaire ’s attention again after he had already rejected you.”

“But you believed her?”

“I don’t know what I believed,” she admitted. “It didn’t sound like something you’d do but…I know how desperation feels. I know that sometimes you do things out of desperation that might not be true to who you are.”

“And is that why you did this?” Erina asked. “Because you felt desperate ? Why? Because Lydrasa was threatening to take away your noble? The one she secured for you after you helped to drive me away from this keep? Or did you do it because you’re just a cruel person who wanted me to fail?”

Velle’s face twisted up. She stared at Erina in silence, an uncomfortable one that reverberated around the entire room.

“I don’t believe you’re a cruel person, Velle,” my mate said softly. “But you only care about yourself. I don’t blame you. I know how you grew up. It’s self-preservation, isn’t it?”

I studied Erina. She was more forgiving than I could ever be too, I realized. Because if anyone did that to me, I’d be sure to make it hurt. I would twist the dagger as I slid it out.

Selfishly, I was glad Erina was forgiving. Because what chance did I have to win her back if she wasn’t?

None.

“I saw the letter come in, addressed to the Kyzaire ,” Velle said quietly, her shoulders sagging. “I read it and brought it to Lydrasa. She told me that if I ever heard news of you to let her know. She fears what your presence means here.”

Fears she’d already addressed with me.

“Go on,” I ordered, my tone cold, making Velle jump slightly.

“It was Lydrasa’s idea to forge the letter. She had different correspondences from you, Kyzaire . With your signature. She easily replicated it, copied your handwriting. And she did send the credits to the account.”

“As a payoff,” I said .

Velle nodded. “To keep Erina away. And it was my job to be on the lookout for more letters, if they came to the keep.”

Which Erina never would’ve sent, I knew. Because she’d thought I’d denied her pregnancy and rejected her.

Gods. What a fucking disaster.

Velle and Lydrasa had nearly cost me my mate and my child.

No, I realized next, setting my jaw tight. They’d only made Erina mistrust me more than she already had.

I would’ve found Erina in Laras, or anywhere she’d gone within the Kaalium. I wouldn’t have stopped until I found her again, and I would’ve learned the truth regardless.

But to know that Erina had been scared and in trouble, that she had reached out to me when she’d learned of the child…that made me want burn down the entirety of House Azola.

Even though I couldn’t.

Lydrasa was nearly untouchable, and she knew it. But I would handle her later.

Erina met my eyes from across the room. She was still standing in line with Maudoric, looking calm. Sad but calm. Accepting.

I’d had her all wrong, hadn’t I?

I thought it very likely that she might just be the kindest soul I knew. Instead I’d made her a manipulative villain in my mind.

But I was not so kind as Erina.

“I want you gone,” I said, keeping my voice even as I looked at Velle. She began to cry, fat tears dripping from her eyes, but I wasn’t swayed by the theatrics. “You are not welcome in my keep again.”

“Please, Kyzaire , I will never do?—”

“Enough,” I growled, glaring down at her. “It’s clear where your loyalties lie. To think that House Azola had their own little spy within my own keep is enough of an offense against me. But to go after my kyrana , my child…that is unforgivable. Go back to them. Given your devotion to their House, I’m sure th ey’ll take you back with haste. But you have no place here in mine.”

Velle looked stricken, with a stream of tears running down her face. Even I knew that a dismissal from House Kaalium would darken her reputation as a keeper. If House Azola didn’t take her back, then she likely wouldn’t be able to find work within a noble House again.

I wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of even thinking about her again once she left this office. But Lydrasa…I would make her remember what she’d done for years.

“Erina,” she whispered. Pleading with my mate now? I barely held back my growl. “Please. This is my home.”

Erina looked at her old friend steadily. I knew it might’ve hurt, but it needed to be done. I would not have poison flowing through my house, waiting to strike again.

“Like I told you the morning I left,” Erina said, “I hope you have a good life with your noble.”

For Erina’s sake, however, I said to Maudoric, “Get her set up at an inn in town. She can stay there until the end of the month to find work.” I met Velle’s eyes again. “But that’s the last I’ll do for you. Go.”

Velle’s breath hitched and she stumbled out of the room. Erina stepped aside, out of her path, and the keeper disappeared down the hallway, presumably to pack up her room.

Maudoric approached me. From her apron pocket, she pulled out a letter, written on thin paper.

“I found it in her room,” she said. Evidence enough.

I inclined my head, and Maudoric left, giving Erina’s arm another touch as she passed.

Then it was just me and my mate in the study. The sunlight shone brightly through the arched window, but I couldn’t help but think of the night we’d last been in here together.

You’re not anything like I’d hoped you be, she’d told me .

I nearly flinched, remembering the words. I’d been so cold that night to her, so detached.

“Is that it?” she asked, gesturing toward the letter held between two of my fingers.

I looked down at the script. Neat and tidy. It was addressed to me, the seal broken.

To Kaldur of House Kaalium, Kyzaire of Vyaan.

I held it out for her, but she shook her head. “You can read it if you’d like. The words were meant for you anyway.”

My brow furrowed, but I slipped my finger below the paper and unfolded it.

It was short, I noticed. To the point.

Kaldur,

I went to a healer today in Laras. His blood test revealed that I’m pregnant. The child is yours. It could be no one else’s, despite what you think of me. The healer estimates I’m four weeks along, but I know that I’m nearly five.

My jaw gritted tight. She knew because it had only happened once, obviously. The night we’d had sex, the night I’d left her.

The night I’d taken her virginity and hadn’t even known it, I thought, regret nearly making me shred the delicate paper with my curling claws.

You deserve to know. I would never keep this from you, but I admit that I’m scared, Kaldur. I don’t know what I should do.

I am staying at Ikrin’s Inn in the South Dock District of Laras. You can write to me here, and I’ll wait for your reply.

She’d signed her name, a beautiful little swirl of a signature. One I imagined her practicing as a child, over and over again.

I stared down at the letter and then read it again.

I didn’t know how I should feel about it, but I felt strangely angered. “You didn’t ask for money,” I said.

She blinked. “You’re…you’re angry about that?”

I blew out a rough breath, her words already committed to memory. I folded the letter carefully and placed it on my desk. I had a feeling by the end of the night, it might be destroyed by how many times I would open and close it, to read it again.

“Had your credits already been stolen when you wrote that letter?” I asked.

She sucked in a small breath as I approached her by the door. Reaching past her, I closed it, allowing us privacy. I kept my arm up, boxing her against it as I stared down at her. Closer than I should be but nowhere close enough.

“You knew about that?” she asked. “How?

“Because I told you—I was there. I went to Ikrin’s. I was asking people on the damn streets if they’d seen someone like you around. An older Kylorr male said there was a human female fitting your description living in his building in the South Dock District. The fucking Dock District , Erina.”

“It…it was cheap,” she protested, her cheeks heating.

“Gods,” I rasped. “If anything had happened to you…”

I might never have known , I thought, and that realization was a sobering thought.

I breathed in deeply, trying to focus on her scent to keep the anger at bay. It calmed me down and I reached forward to clasp a small section of her dark red hair, rubbing the wild strands of it between my fingers .

“I found Ikrin’s. He told me you’d been there. He told me about the theft. So I knew you had very little money,” I said. “But you wrote to me without communicating the position you’d found yourself in. With very little credits to your name, working at a small inn, and sleeping in a drafty room in the Dock District.”

“I’d had money until it was stolen,” she argued, frowning up at me. “I was doing fine until that night. Getting a room at Ikrin’s was only temporary, until I found a better job.”

Hearing her speak about this didn’t help my temper. Hearing her plans to try to make a better life for herself in Laras didn’t help my temper.

And I’d put her in that position. I’d driven her to Laras. She’d been angry and proud enough to reject the money I’d given her.

“You should’ve asked for money,” I growled.

“Why?” she said, glaring. “So it could cement who you thought I was in your mind?”

“You are pregnant with my fucking child, Erina,” I hissed, my chest heaving.

We stared at one another. I could almost scent the rush of her blood beneath her skin, and venom flooded over my tongue. I hadn’t meant to escalate this, but to think that she’d been in danger and that I could have helped her ate at me.

Her eyes dropped to my lips, and I felt the heat rise between us. I could hear her heartbeat. She might’ve hated me but she still desired me.

This wasn’t about her not asking me for money. This was about me failing her so completely, and that dissipated any lust I felt in that charged moment.

It was another reminder of how I’d fucked everything up. And I was taking it out on her.

“This is my fault,” I told her. Surprise flashed in her eyes when she moved them away from my lips. “I’m sorry. I’m getting angry over a hypothetical. I never would’ve gotten the letter anyway, even if you had asked for help. ”

“I did ask you for help,” she said. “Just not the kind you’re used to giving. I wanted to talk to you.”

I flinched. She was right. When you were wealthy, you thought you could throw money at every problem and it would be fixed. In most cases, it was. Because people were inherently greedy.

I’d done it to Erina, even. That last night in my study. I’d smirked as I’d offered to make her my mistress, told her to name her price for her place in my bed.

I’d thought she would take it. In my arrogance, I’d thought everyone could be bought.

But not my kyrana .

My shoulders dropped. My head lowered too until I was bent forward, my forehead pressed into the crook of her neck—a comforting position because I could smell her so strongly. She floated in my head like lore smoke.

“Kaldur,” she whispered.

I was careful of my horns, however. I didn’t want to accidentally cut her.

“I only feel the need to protect you,” I murmured. “I failed before. That’s what I’m angry about. I failed so spectacularly that it’s astonishing, and I can only blame myself.”

I raised my head. Her expression was guarded, but I knew she was listening . Listening carefully to what I was saying.

“I want you to rely on me,” I told her. “To lean on me if you need anything at all.”

“Because you feel…guilty?”

I huffed out a breath. “Because I need to. I never understood what it meant to have a kyrana . A part of me, truthfully, detests it.”

Her brow furrowed.

“Because suddenly, instantly, there’s someone else in existence that can be your complete downfall,” I told her. “I know you’ve been on your own for a long time, Erina. I just want you to know that you’re not anymore.”

Her expression morphed until it looked like I’d struck her. I saw the words sink in, as if she was just realizing it for herself, despite what our relationship currently was: one of mistrust and lingering bitterness.

“I know you don’t trust me,” I said. “But I’m not going anywhere, Erina. And I’ll prove that to you every day until you believe me.”

She looked unsure. And that was when I saw it.

I saw how desperately she wanted to believe me. That wonderment and hope in her eyes that had never quite left. There was a part of her that still had feelings for me, feelings I’d done my best to ignore or deny when she’d offered them to me once so willingly.

That was when I knew I had a chance with her still. Erina Denoren, with her open heart, was still there, as she had been before. Only now she was more guarded, a wall built up around her, one just like mine.

I only needed to break it down.

And then she might be mine again.