Page 24 of Hunger in His Blood (Brides of the Kylorr #3)

CHAPTER 24

ERINA

B y dawn, I had all my belongings packed in the same bag that I’d come to the keep with. One I’d purchased for mere credits at a vendor stall in the market, shortly after I’d left Wrezaan’s. The handle was frayed, barely holding on by mere threads, and I worried that this was the final trip where it’d give up on me.

There was something sad about my entire life being packed into a single bag. While I didn’t own much, I’d always dreamed of a home filled with lovely things. Permanent things that I’d picked up on travels or had been gifts from friends. Things that held special meaning. Things that could never be taken away from me.

In my bag, I had the clothes that I owned, my vial of perfume, my tin of pencils, and the plethora of notebooks I’d kept over the years. I’d discarded a couple dresses so that they would all fit—and I’d left my keeper uniforms, and my trusty apron, hanging in the wardrobe. I didn’t have much, and it was probably a lucky thing that I didn’t.

I’d done something bad as well. I’d gone to the starlight hallway, walking down it for the last time in the early hours of morning, and ventured to the sitting room where everything had changed. I went to the console drawer, where I’d hidden the vase fragments, and I stole one of the larger pieces. It really was a lovely color, and this one had the most of the delicately painted and foiled vines and flowers on it. It would be the one thing I took from House Kaalium—and I wanted it to be a reminder.

I’d wrapped it up in a spare cloth and shoved it into the side of my traveling bag. Before I left, I made sure my letters were safely tucked into my pocket.

When the sun rose over the distant mountains, I took a final look around the room and left. The keep was quiet, though I would try to avoid any keepers on my way out.

My emotions oscillated from numbness to anger to heartbreak to betrayal. On a constant loop. As I made my way through the darkened halls of the keep that had been my home for the last two years, I felt another emotion creep into my heart. Sorrow.

I had been content here. It had been the first time I’d felt secure. I would never forget that.

But I tightened my hand on my traveling bag and moved on. When I passed Kaldur’s closed door to his quarters, I didn’t even blink.

Move forward, move forward, I told myself. It was all I would allow myself to think. Move forward and start new, far from here.

Far away from him .

But on my way out of the keep, right when I’d made it nearly to the front door, I heard a familiar voice.

“Erina? Where in Raazos’s name are you going at this hour?”

I blew out a breath and turned to find Velle watching me. She was dressed already, her face freshly scrubbed. She looked like was on her way to the kitchens, halting by the staircase that I’d just come down.

She was one of the last people I wanted to see. When Kaldur had told me what Velle had said…I’d believed it. I did believe that she’d tried to drive a wedge between us. The ugliest part was that it was easy to believe.

And that should tell me everything I needed to know about someone I considered a friend. Was I so desperate to be loved by someone that I was willing to overlook anything?

That was something I needed to figure out for myself. But it wouldn’t be here.

“I’m leaving,” I told her.

Her eyes widened. Silence lapsed in the atrium, which just last night had been filled with a plethora of people from all over Vyaan.

“What do you mean you’re leaving ?” Velle asked carefully, her eyes narrowing on me. She looked to my bag, and she blinked, stilling. “As in leaving the keep? For good?”

“Yes,” I replied.

Velle’s chin tilted up. She didn’t look surprised…so why did that surprise me?

I shifted the handle to my other hand. “Kaldur told me that you said I shouldn’t be trusted,” I said. “Is that what you really believe?”

The numbness was sliding back into my chest, spreading as I watched her. I was actually glad I’d run into her, I decided. Because I was done making excuses for people. I should start listening to them when they revealed who they truly were instead of wishing that they were different.

“I—that’s not…” Velle started, but then she inhaled a sharp breath.

“Did you ever really think of me as your friend?” I asked.

“Of course I did,” she replied, her tone rising in defensiveness.

“Then why would you do that?” I asked. “I’m trying to understand. Because you were jealous?”

“I wasn’t,” she began to say, her voice rising, her brow furrowing. Then she laughed. She shook her head. “Actually, yes. Now you know the ugly part of me, Erina. I was jealous. You got what I wanted. Guess I couldn’t stand it.”

Her tone was mocking, sarcastic. But didn’t she realize that she was telling the truth?

Suddenly I didn’t care. I was done caring. I could simply walk away. It wouldn’t matter at all to Velle.

“Did you know Kaldur and Lydrasa were in his study last night?” I asked. The only thing I wanted confirmed. “Did Lydrasa put you up to it? Or was it your idea?”

When she said nothing, I knew that was answer enough. I wondered what was in it for her…

A sliver of knowing pierced me. I realized she’d told me last night.

“I hope you have a good life with your noble,” I said, inclining my head at her. My tone was cool, almost chilled. “I’m sure Lydrasa picked well for you.”

With that, I turned to leave. I didn’t want to waste another moment more with someone who so clearly wanted to hurt me. She didn’t try to stop me.

I doubted I’d ever see her again.

Good riddance, I thought, determination soaring through me when I looked over a lightening Vyaan. The morning was cold, and I wore my heaviest coat to save room in my bag. I was grateful for it, especially during the long walk into the village.

First I posted the letters. One to Luc, which should reach him tomorrow, telling him of my plans to come to Laras. The other to Syndras with an explanation and with promises to write. She likely wouldn’t see it until the following week, or whenever she returned from her trip. I was only sorry I couldn’t say goodbye to her in person, when she’d helped me so much, but I knew she would understand.

Next I went to the creditory to check my account, stepping up into a private booth to access my funds. Maudoric had always deposited my pay from the keep, and I’d saved up a healthy amount. I withdrew some coins for food along the journey to Laras.

I paused when I spied the ten vron that had come in just a couple days ago. My first payment from Kaldur. I debated only for a brief moment…but I knew if I accepted it, it would always be a lingering regret.

I rejected the amount. It would return to House Kaalium’s account, where it’d come from. And while I wondered about the logic of that decision when I was about to upend my life, I didn’t linger on it. What was done was done. I didn’t want anything of his. After everything that had happened, I wanted to be clean . To be free.

But the credits I’d earned as a keeper…those were mine alone. I’d earned every last one.

When I left the creditory, I felt lighter. A weight off my shoulders. He didn’t own me anymore, and I owed him nothing. Our contract was void. He’d taken and I’d given. And I vowed that I’d never let another Kylorr feed off me again.

I stocked up with food for the journey at one of the only vendor stalls open, one meant to feed the builders and merchants this early.

My final stop was the transport station. A bleary-eyed small group had already formed, humans like me or hybrid Kylorr with no wings, and I got in line.

“Do you know when the next caravan to Laras is?” I asked the older female in front of me. She was a full-blooded Kylorr but likely too advanced in her years to make a long trip by flight, especially with luggage.

“Shouldn’t be long now,” she replied, eyeing my bag. “Visiting the capital, are we?”

“Moving there,” I corrected with a small, polite smile I didn’t feel. “And finding an old friend. ”

Over my shoulder, I looked over Vyaan. The only home I’d ever known.

A short while later, I heard the rumbling of wheels clattering down the stone road. The caravan. A covered vehicle, larger than I’d anticipated, came into view.

Move forward, I reminded myself, even though I was scared. Start new.