Page 42 of House of the Beast

I paused to consider my answer. I’d never had to put it into words before. My father had been the only one to talk to me about commune, and he had been concerned only with the technique, not the emotional toll. I could feel Aster behind me, still sullen, perhaps waiting to hear my thoughts as well.

“I think it’s different for me than the others,” I began carefully.

“I don’t have to put much effort into it.

When I was young, the Beast was just a presence I could feel, or something I could see out of the corner of my eye.

It used to give me nightmares. It still does, but I’ve gotten used to it.

He doesn’t scare me anymore. Now it’s just like talking to a person who’s by my side all the time. ”

“All the time?” said Sevelie, astonished.

“Well, most of the time,” I said dryly, thinking of tonight, when I had been left to face the glittering nobility of Sorrowsend and then the wrath of my uncle alone. “There is very little privacy.”

Sevelie’s eyes darted around the room, as if she were imagining someone watching her from the corner. Her lips tightened with discomfort. When she met my gaze again, she gave an exaggerated shudder. “That wouldn’t suit me at all!”

I let out a relieved breath. It was actually quite satisfying, to finally air some of my grievances about this unique bond I had with Aster. I had never had the opportunity to, before.

“It really is quite annoying sometimes,” I said with zest.

“Hey,” said Aster behind me, sounding wounded.

“Perhaps it’s good that I never became a vessel, then,” said Sevelie with a wistful smile. “Well, I won’t keep you up any longer. You must be exhausted after tonight. Good night, Alma.”

She turned to leave. I had the distinct feeling that I should say something—but words had never been my strong suit. I searched my mind for an appropriate farewell, but instead burst out with “It’s Fion, isn’t it?”

Sevelie looked at me with wide eyes, confused. Then it dawned on her what I was referring to. A grin overtook her face. “You saw it, right?” she said, so delighted in the moment to share this secret that she seemingly forgot about her heartache.

“Yes,” I said wryly. “They are quite obvious, now that I think about it.”

She threw her head back and laughed. “That’s what I’ve been thinking! I cannot believe Auntie Darantha doesn’t notice. I personally don’t believe they’re together yet—either Kaim is too much of a coward or he’s asked and been rejected.”

At this, I laughed as well. Even though I could feel Aster stewing behind me, it felt good to let loose. “Thank you,” I managed once I was done. “For checking in on me. I appreciate it.”

Sevelie’s face lit up again. “Of course. Anytime, Alma.” She gave me a dainty wave with her fingers, and then she was gone.

I shut the door again and leaned against it.

Aster’s good mood was no longer there. He met my gaze with furrowed brows, his eyes dark.

“Not friends, you say?”

“Don’t start,” I told him bitingly. “I already have plenty reason not to forgive you.”

“You told her I was annoying.”

“You are annoying,” I affirmed, thinking of all the times he had gotten me into trouble in the past, or all the times he had teased me about my errant feelings.

We stood there and stared at each other for a moment, bitterness festering between us.

It could have gone on—I was almost stubborn enough to let it.

But my metal hand still tingled with the memory of his presence.

Despite my frustration, I knew Aster was right—we had achieved something incredible tonight.

Something I would need in the days to come, if I were to have any hope of succeeding.

And truth be told, I did not want to be mad at him any longer.

My whole world felt off kilter when we were fighting.

He had said that he was jealous—which meant he was insecure.

I understood, because that was how I felt whenever I thought of the Beast lending his power to the rest of my family.

And during those times, Aster was always quick to comfort me, to assure me that I was his favorite.

I allowed myself to deflate, slowly letting the anger drain away.

“You are annoying,” I repeated, “but I’ve never been alone because of you, and I’m thankful for that. ”

Instantly, his anger seemed to melt away.

I was still torn about tonight’s events—but I knew that without him, I would have died.

In fact, without Aster, I may very well have wasted away from heartbreak after my mother’s death.

He had given me a reason to pick myself up and keep going.

A purpose. He had been more than a savior—he’d been a friend.

I may not have gotten the answers I wanted, but I had to forgive him because he chose me.

“I really am sorry about what happened with your uncle,” said Aster, taking a tentative step closer. His eyes were wide, his tone plaintive, and the message was clear—that he had finally realized how hurt I was and that he meant to make amends.

“Do you speak to him like you do to me?” I asked.

I had assured him that he was important—but what about me?

What if he was friends with Maximus Avera, pretending to favor him the same way he did me?

If he confirmed it now, then I would know he was lying about not having a hand in my uncle’s actions.

“No,” said Aster, stopping before me as if placing himself for my examination.

I searched his face, his sunlight eyes. He did not flinch, did not hide, only met my gaze with utter sincerity. He was telling the truth.

“Okay,” I said quietly.

He reached for my metal hand, fingers curling around mine—hesitant at first, then more securely once I did not push him away.

“I know you’re not happy with me, but I must ask you to trust me, Alma.

I promise I have only your best interests at heart.

All of this is for our sake.” He quirked his mouth wryly.

“I’d even dance with you in front of Carnus Metia, if that’s what it takes to convince you. ”

He knew I would never want such a thing, and he chuckled as I snorted at the image.

Still, I let him twine our fingers together, flesh against metal.

A comfortable quiet fell over us, and I let it wash away the last of my anger.

The ceremony of initiation was over. I had passed it, though it had been more of an ordeal than I could have possibly imagined.

And if my uncle’s words were true, then I had indeed been chosen over him.

I had been chosen. Me. And despite all the bloodshed and the doubt, it was beautiful indeed to know that I had been touched by an elder god.

My fingers tightened against Aster’s. Even if House Avera refused to acknowledge me now, I would prove to them that I was better than my father and Kaim both.

They could cling to their reasons and doubts all they wanted, but once I emerged from the umbral plane victorious, they would have no choice but to accept that I was the only one worthy of the Beast.

My uncle had called me the one who would bring them all to ruin.

Perhaps I really would.