Page 54 of Hold Me Instead (Elmwood Falls #1)

“Could have dinner, watch a movie. If you’re not sick of that by then.” He played with strands of her hair as he waited for her answer.

“That sounds perfect,” she said. They had a lot to discuss, but it could wait. ?Til after the holidays, maybe.

His eyes locked on hers, his smile bringing back those deep creases she loved so much. She traced them, his eyes softening.

She had to tell him something . This moment was too perfect. Her heart was in it, and it felt right to put it on the line—that she cared about him, deeply .

Zachary’s gaze moved, and he straightened, effectively sliding Charlie to his side. She looked over to find Daniel entering the room, his steps slow as he took in the two of them.

“Hey, Dad,” Zachary said, clearing his throat.

Daniel said nothing, instead taking a seat across from them, his eyes still calculating.

Charlie tugged her legs out from under her and Zachary shifted some more, sliding the blanket from his lap.

“I wanted to talk to you both.”

She braced herself. Daniel was probably about to tell her the practice was in trouble, not knowing Zachary already had. She was prepared for this, she would tell him she’d still buy in, that it didn’t matter—

“Charlie, I’ve transferred the practice over to Zachary.”

“Dad,” Zachary choked out.

Charlie blinked at Daniel, shooting a quick glance at Zachary before looking back at her boss, her mentor, once again. “I’m sorry, what?”

“I had the paperwork drawn up this week. EFVH is now in his name. It was best for everyone, believe me. I understand you’re aware I was in some financial trouble.”

She swallowed hard. “I had heard, yes, but I don’t understand.”

“There are certain tax laws and breaks that come with it moving between family.”

“Right, family…” Charlie said absently.

“Dad, you couldn’t be a little more gentle with this?”

Charlie turned to Zachary, registered his lack of surprise.

Zachary looked at her. “I’m sorry, Charlie, I didn’t ask for—”

She looked at Daniel. “When was this decided?”

“I had the paperwork finalized yesterday. This doesn’t mean anything about your work with the practice, Charlie. Your dedication has been above and beyond.”

“Just not family level,” she said. It was the most brash tone she’d used with Daniel in all the years she’d known him.

“This has nothing to do with your ability to run things, Charlie.” His gentled tone didn’t matter.

She felt her heartbeat in her throat. “Then why not talk to me about what was going on? You owed me that, Daniel.”

He firmed his lips. “It was something I had to take care of myself.”

“You didn’t think you could even talk to me about it?” Charlie scooted to the edge of the couch. “After all this time?”

Daniel looked to Zachary, a gaze passing between them that Charlie didn’t understand. Zachary held up his hands.

“This isn’t my thing, Dad. You surprised me too.”

“So now I’ll have you both mad at me,” Daniel said.

She was fuming. She couldn’t remember ever being mad at him.

He’d only ever guided her with a kind hand, been there for her throughout all those years of schooling, of learning.

Was someone she could consult, could securely admit when she didn’t know something—because, like he’d always reminded her, how could she know everything?

There was always something new to learn.

A lesson he must have forgotten.

It was a major reminder that their respect didn’t go both ways.

“Charlie, I still want you there. This doesn’t change that.”

“You know it’s not what we agreed to, Daniel. It’s not what we’ve talked about all these years,” Charlie said. She choked up, tears threatening, but she was too angry to let them spill .

“That can still be an option. Right now, things will shift over to Zachary until we can get on more solid ground.”

She looked at Zachary. “So, you are staying?”

“I haven’t actually agreed to or signed anything yet.” Zachary looked between her and his dad. “I’m still trying to figure all this out.”

She nodded slowly. “Yeah.” She blew out a loud breath.

“This forces you to stay in town, take over for your father, see me when we were supposed to be temporary. That must be really throwing you for a loop.” She huffed out a crazed laugh and stood, running her hands through her hair. “Um, I’m going to go.”

She hurried out of the room and passed quickly through the living room, ignoring the sound of her name from other members of the family. She had to get out of there. Get some air, clear her head. Figure out what she needed to do.

Her coat and purse in hand, she stepped outside, shoving her heels the rest of the way into her boots. The snow fluttered in a whimsical dance, cool on her face, melting on the war in her chest. She tugged on her coat, feeling sobs threatening to escape.

“Charlie!” Zachary turned her to face him. “Charlie.” He swiped at her cheeks, removing evidence of tears she didn’t know were there. “Let’s talk this out. I’ll come over, and we can sort through this mess together—”

“I’m in love with you,” Charlie blurted.

His hand stilled on her face, but his eyes widened to hers. “What?” he asked softly.

“Shit,” she whispered. “Zachary, I’m in love with you.

It’s terrible timing. I don’t even know why I said it right now, it sort of fell out.

It’s been on my mind, and that doesn’t help all of…

this .” She gestured wildly between them, the house, at the romantic snow.

“I don’t want us to be temporary. I haven’t for a while now.

But this complicates everything. You didn’t want more, and now the business is yours.

And for some reason, that isn’t the part that bothers me the most, which pisses me off.

That is what makes this complicated. I couldn’t work for you, and not only because the thought drives me crazy.

But I couldn’t, knowing how I feel, and that you don’t feel the same way.

” She swallowed, then sucked in a breath and went for broke. “Do you?”

His hand fell to his side. “Charlie…”

She waited until he didn’t say anything else. “Right,” she muttered. Her nods were frantic as she stepped back, tears streaming down her face. He reached toward her, but she held up her hands. “Don’t.”

“This was supposed to be temporary. We both…” he trailed off.

“Yep. Yes. That’s what we agreed to. Initially.”

He shifted on his feet, his breath a white burst between them. “You need to go experience more now, anyway. Now that you’re free from all that shit. Date around. Do…what you want.” His words were strained. “You deserve that.”

“What? I don’t want that.” How did he not see? “I deserve you!”

His laugh was unamused. “I don’t deserve you ! You deserve better than I can give! Look at how I’m already crushing you!”

She shook her head, daring a step closer. “You mean I don’t deserve someone who accepted me for who I am? Who never pressured me?”

He scoffed. “I constantly pressure you.”

“In work, yes. We both do. I’m talking about personally, Zachary. You never made me feel like I was falling short. You made me feel sexy when it was the last thing I imagined being.”

His throat worked. “Well, you are. I’m not the only one who sees it. ”

“I don’t care about anyone else. I care about you!”

He scrubbed his hands through his hair, face pained. “Charlie, I don’t want you to look back one day and regret this. To wish you’d had time to really find what you’re looking for.”

She was shocked at his words. Appalled at how differently they’d been viewing their connection. It didn’t change how she felt, and she wasn’t going to tell him otherwise.

She huffed. “You know what I’d regret? Letting you go.

” She stood a beat, working up the final strands of courage.

“I know what I’m looking for. Us, together?

That’s when I realized what a relationship could be.

The respect, the support, the need. I want to live out my fantasies and dreams with you , Zachary. As my partner.”

The silence of the snowfall surrounded them, the blankets of white absorbing their words.

Charlie sensed her cheeks were numb, but she could no longer determine if it was from the cold or from the look in Zachary’s eyes.

He lifted his hand, like maybe he wanted to reach out for her, but then crossed his arms.

“I’m sorry, Charlie,” he said softly. “I can’t be part of making your dreams come true. I’m only capable of wrecking them. Look how quickly I ruined the practice for you.”

This was it. Temporary hit swiftly, Zachary staying true to their plan, and holding fast that he’d remind her if they strayed off course.

She gave him a nod and hustled toward her car, arms flailing wide for balance as she slipped on some ice. Once steady, she kept moving, undeterred. Nothing would stop her.

“Charlie.”

Her back was to him as she reached her car, and she didn’t look his way. Only waited .

“I’m sorry.”

She closed her eyes and blew out a quiet breath, then climbed into her car. If she looked at him, she’d lose it. So instead, she drove away, without a glance in the rearview. Leaving her job, as she knew it, floating in the breeze.

And her heart buried in the snow.