Page 3 of Hidden Plays (Desert Football #1)

Casey looked up from a book. “Stop pacing and sit your ass down.” He flicked a knowing grin at Malik Thompson, our running back. “Maybe if you were getting some on the regular, you wouldn’t be so tense.”

Here we go. They were going to chide me about hookups at the gay bar again. Ever since my relationship with Myles imploded, that's all they talked about. “I’m fine on my own.” It’s not like I didn’t have orgasms, for fuck’s sake. I had my toys. They needn’t know specifics.

Malik swung his gaze from the television, studying me with his large, brown eyes, his dark hair falling to his cheekbones. The guy was big and fast. Guess that’s how they made football players in New Mexico. “Dude, I’ve got two words for you. Gay. Bar.” His smile reached his eyes.

“Jesus fuck. I knew that was coming.” With a huff, I dropped onto the end of the couch. “I had a few hookups, and I told you, they’re not for me.” Okay, one. Thanks to Casey’s app, I had one and hoped for more with him, but the guy was only interested in sex. He didn’t want a relationship.

Travis Rowlings, also known as Tex, since he was born and raised in Austin, leaned forward and planted his elbows on his knees, his blond hair falling into his blue eyes.

He swiped the hair from his face. He was one of our offensive linemen and almost as big as Eli.

They had a little competition going on in the weight room.

“What the hell do you have against the gay bar?”

“It’s not my scene. I’ve told you guys that.” I pursed my lips. Was I really so weird? “Everyone’s all fucking sweaty and bumping and grinding all over everyone else?—”

“So, you don’t like bodily fluids?” Casey scoffed a chuckle. “Dude, don’t you swallow? No wonder you don’t have a boyfriend.”

I stared at him for a moment. “I fucking swallow. Cum is different.” Oh, no…I’d opened myself up.

“I suppose a guy has to shower before you blow him.” Eli barked out a laugh, stirring the food in the pot.

“It would be a kind gesture.” I lifted my chin. Shit, was I OCD or something? No, I just liked good hygiene. Was it too much to ask? Except for Myles…I liked the way he smelled, even if he’d just come from the gym. Fuck me.

“Let me get this straight. You don’t like the gay bar because you think all the guys are sweaty and gross and you wouldn’t reciprocate a blow job from a guy in there unless he washes his dick first?” Tex sniggered. “Bro, maybe you could ask the guy to wash it in the sink before you blow him.”

“What the fuck?” Malik belly-laughed and swiped at his eyes. “JJ, you’ve got some odd hang-ups. Maybe you’re too much of a rich boy. You’re used to everything being pristine.”

“No, it was not always pristine.” Except it was. I’d grown up in a North Scottsdale mansion with a maid that came three times a week, and yeah, I liked nice things. Shaking my head, I snickered and said, “You fuckers love teasing me about this.”

“We do, but you know we love you, man.” Leaning over, Casey kissed my cheek and then pointed at me. “Do not wipe that off.”

I glared at him, my hand itching to swipe my cheek. Fuck, did I have hang-ups? Is that why Myles couldn’t connect with me? “I won’t. See?” Lifting my brows, I smiled at him.

“I’ve met men at the gay bar who were awesome guys. You never know unless you go.” Malik’s grin faded. “I’m serious, man. Meeting people in person is way better than those fucking apps. Might as well see what they really look like right away.”

“Fuck, okay. I’ll think about it.” I hung my head, teasing a fold in my athletic shorts. They’d never let me out of this unless I agreed to it.

“We could go this weekend after the game?” Wrinkling his forehead, Casey scanned the guys. “What do you all say?”

“Naw, I’m swamped with studying on Sunday, and when I go there, the temptation to drink and stay out late is too much.” Tex frowned.

“Yeah, me too. If I didn’t have this test in genetics coming up, I’d do it though.” Malik pursed his lips. “Maybe in a few weeks after our away game?”

“Yeah, fine.” Casey huffed and folded his arms across his chest. “Maybe Cooper would want to go—” His breath caught, and his gaze snapped to me. “Sorry.”

“Yeah, I won’t go to the gay bar with Myles and Cooper. Fuck that.” I stood and stomped into the kitchen. “I’ll set the table.” The conversation needed to end.

After Eli’s amazing dinner, I sat on my bed with my book in my lap.

I was sick of reading. I’d looked over the stretches Holden sent.

They didn’t look any better than the ones Stacey had me doing.

Fuck it. I glanced at my phone, resting on the bed next to me.

I hadn’t called Mom in a few weeks. Shit.

I snatched my phone and called her number.

The line rang a few times.

“Hello? Jordan?” Mom asked.

“Hey, Mom. Just checking in.” I shifted on the bed, resting my back against the pillows on the headboard. Her voice always soothed me. Was I a mama’s boy? Yeah…I smiled .

“About time.” She freed a soft giggle. “How are your grades?”

“Good as always.” I glanced at my book. I’d been reading about profit-and-loss statements. Boring. “I was just studying for my finance class.”

“That’ll come in handy when you get your NFL contract.”

I rolled my eyes. “Of course, Mom.” She and Dad were always afraid I’d blow all my money. I might, but it’d be mine to blow. I lifted a corner of my lips. “How is Dad doing?”

“Oh, he’s at work. He got called into the hospital for an emergency surgery.”

“Typical.” Dad, being one of the best anesthesiologists, meant he was in high demand when the hospitals had complicated cases. I toyed with a fold in my comforter.

“I can have him call you when he’s home. Maybe tomorrow?” She sucked in a breath.

An ache wound through my chest. What the hell would we talk about? “I don’t think it’s necessary. I’ll talk to him soon enough.” Like maybe in a month when I was home for Thanksgiving.

“You two should talk more.” Her voice became softer. “He loves you, Jordan. He might have a hard time showing it, but he does.”

Except Dad had no problem showing his love to my straight sister. I tensed my mouth. My relationship with my dad had changed after I came out. “Yeah, I know.” Nothing I did ever made it better.

“How’s Nicole?” I breathed in deeply. She was following in Dad’s footsteps, pursuing pre-med. Okay, maybe that explained their closeness. But I was playing the game Dad loved.

“She’s doing well. I hear there’s a boy she’s interested in. Of course, your father doesn’t approve. He keeps reminding her that if her grades fall, she won’t get into med school.”

“Her grades won’t fall. She’s smart as hell.” I smiled, my heart warming with her memory. My sister had no problem accepting me. In fact, she was happy to get my take on any guy she liked. She found it helpful to have a gay brother. “So, I wonder when Nicole will call me about this guy?”

“Soon, I’m sure.” Mom chuckled. “How are you doing on that front? Is anyone catching your eye since Myles?”

My heart pricked. I wouldn’t mention the hookup. I had tried to push Myles out of my heart. “No, not yet. I’ll be focusing on football this year, not guys.”

“Oh, so…does it still hurt a little?”

I shifted, breathing through the ache in my chest. It had taken such a short time for me to fall for Myles, a hockey player who I’d met in a class last year. But we weren’t meant to be. “Yeah.” No reason to be evasive with Mom.

“I’m sorry, honey. I’m sure the right man will appear when you’re good and ready.”

“Yeah, thanks, Mom.” She was always so positive. I glanced at the time in the corner of my screen. I had practice in the morning. “Hey, I need to go to bed.”

“Of course. I’m glad you called. Maybe next time your father will be home, and you two can talk.”

“Sure.” If it were the three of us, speaking with Dad would be easier. Would my relationship with him improve once I hit the NFL? “Talk to you soon, Mom.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too, bye.” I ended the call. Holden would be at practice in the morning. Fuck.