Page 53 of Hell Bent (Portland Devils #5)

“What else do you have,” Sebastian asked, “besides my poverty? Go on, lay it on me.” Neither of them had budged an inch, and Sebastian had folded his arms. Which unfortunately just showed off his muscles, because he was wearing the golden-brown merino sweater again, and it was knit so fine, you could recognize every bit of his biceps and forearms through it.

“Oh, for heaven’s sake,” my mother said. “Stop it, you two. We aren’t going to solve anything like this.”

Ned was always deferential to my mother.

He called her “Princess,” in fact, which she loved and about made me gag.

Why hadn’t that bothered me more? Now, though, he ignored her completely and said, “You’re doing some blue-collar job that she thinks makes you a real man, right?

Like that’s any kind of measure. Alix calls herself a feminist, likes to act tough, but in the end, it’s all about the guys in work boots.

Guys who make forty dollars an hour and gripe about their boss and think they’re hot shit and probably treat women like garbage.

I bet you ride a motorcycle too. Ooh, so sexy.

Until you crash it and she ends up in the ICU, and you dump her because she doesn’t look good anymore.

I was prepared to love and cherish you, Alix, even with all your limitations, but that wasn’t good enough.

You had to have your working-class fantasy.

Where does that even come from? I don’t get it.

It’s sure not how you were raised. I’ve been in that house.

Billionaire’s Row, Pacific Heights,” he told Sebastian.

“Not that you’d know what that is. And it’s a family house.

Her dad’s family. They’re all rich. Both sides.

Do you really think she’s going to pick you? ”

“Ned,” my mother said.

“I’m sorry you have to hear this, Princess,” Ned said. “But somebody needs to say it.”

I couldn’t help it. I laughed. Every head swiveled to look at me, my mother drawing herself up like she was about to say, “This is hardly appropriate, Anastasia,” Ned looking like, “I knew you were unstable all along, but now you’ve gone around the bend,” and Sebastian looking like, “This is so stupid, and would you let me defend you for once?”

I did my best to answer them all by saying, “Look. I know you don’t get it.

I didn’t get it either. I thought I was ready to change my life.

I thought all of it was more mature, somehow, stepping into the life I should want.

The wedding. The registry. The BMW. Moving into your fancy condo in the best building.

The degree. The job. Until I realized I didn’t want any of them, and I didn’t want the man, either.

Not because he’s a bad person. Because he—you—really don’t get me, and you never will.

None of which is a tragedy, it’s just life.

I’m sorry you came all this way, which is what I don’t get, but hey. We all make mistakes.”

I thought that was good. Understanding. Mature .

“Except that’s not it at all,” Ned said.

“You wanted the rough trade. She can’t do it,” he told Sebastian.

“Haven’t you found that out yet? You can’t bruise her.

She’s too delicate. Except that she can somehow do that job.

She can somehow do everything, and she doesn’t need you for anything except sex, but you’re supposed to treat her like she’s fragile there.

Go figure that. She wants to be some Amazon, but so sorry, she’s defective.

She probably can’t even have kids! What exactly does she bring to the party?

Not money, not until everybody dies. Not hot sex.

Not kids. Not education, because she doesn’t even have a degree!

So what’s the attraction, huh? What’s the attraction? ”

Well, this was embarrassing.

My mother started to say, “Ned,” again, with an exclamation point this time, but she was too late.

Sebastian didn’t hit Ned. He grabbed him, spun him around, and twisted his hand behind his back. The same way he’d done this morning with me, but a whole lot less gentle. His voice was quiet when he said into Ned’s ear, “That’s enough,” but it sure carried some menace.

“I’ll say when—” Ned began, but Sebastian didn’t let him. He told my mother, “Car keys.”

“I beg your pardon?” my mother said, at her most regal.

“I don’t want to hit him,” Sebastian said. “And if we don’t get him out of here, I will. Car keys.”

Ned was struggling, and Sebastian increased the pressure and said, “If I have to hurt you to make you leave, I’ll do it.”

“This is … assault,” Ned gasped. “I’ll press charges.”

“No,” I said. “You’re trespassing. Sebastian is removing you. Give him the keys, Mother.”

My mother said, “Oh, for heaven’s sake,” but she pulled the fob from her purse and handed it over.

Sebastian said, “Right. Let’s go.”

Which would have been an excellent idea, except that I didn’t seem to be done yet.

I said, “Thanks for showing up and saying all that. Seriously, thanks. I don’t know why I didn’t realize before, but the real reason I ran?

You’re a snob. Why did you want to go out with some ancient college student-slash-electrician in the first place, one who wasn’t even up for the kind of rough sex a successful man like you is due?

I’ll bet Brian had things to say about that, didn’t he?

It was because I’m a princess. Because of that house, and guess what?

I’m an only child! And because of my mother, who’s a snob, too, but I love her, so I forgive it. But I don’t want to marry it.”

Sebastian just looked at me over Ned’s head—Ned was a little bent over by this point—and I said, “What?”

He said, “You done?”

“Not quite,” I decided. “And I shouldn’t have to say this.

Maybe I’m a snob, too, but at least I’m working on it.

The reason your CrossFit class isn’t doing anything for you right now?

That’s because Sebastian plays for the NFL and works out so much harder than that every single day. You lose both ways.”

“Which makes you,” Ned gritted out through the pain, “a hypocrite. And a snob.”

“Well, if that means I like hot guys,” I said, and Sebastian laughed. Fortunately.

“Because the money doesn’t matter,” Ned said. “Get real.”

“I don’t need his money,” I said. “I didn’t need your money. I don’t need my parents’ money, either. I do fine.”

“Right,” Ned said. “You’re living at a KOA.”

“That’s why I do fine,” I said. “It’s the Charles Dickens philosophy.”

“What?” Ned looked mighty uncomfortable. I probably shouldn’t be keeping him here talking, but it seemed I was doing it anyway.

“Because I like my trailer fine,” I said, “and living at the KOA costs me about a thousand bucks a month, Mr. Micawber, David Copperfield. ‘Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen nineteen and six, result happiness.Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery.’ My grandpa taught me that. Something to think about.”

“You done now?” Sebastian asked.

“Yes,” I said.

“I’m not done,” my mother said.

Sebastian had his patient face on now. “Go ahead. I can hold this guy all night. He’s not exactly straining me here.” At which Ned did some more struggling, to absolutely no avail.

My mother said, “I’m surprised at you, Ned. Surprised, and disappointed. Talking like that to a woman.”

“Wake up,” Ned said. “Men don’t want to be bossed around, and they don’t want to be told they can’t go hard in bed, either. Alix wanted me because I let myself be pushed around, but I’m not doing it anymore.”

My mother said, “That is too ridiculous to justify a response. And I don’t want you in my car. Please call for a ride back to wherever you plan to stay tonight, as we’ve missed the last flight. You may sit in the car until it comes, as it’s raining.”

Ned said, “I’m just telling the truth. Not my fault if you don’t like it.”

“Yeah,” I said. “Thanks. You said it. We got it. My feelings are really hurt. Congratulations.” Since I sort of spit that out, it probably didn’t sound sincere.

Sebastian said, “Open the door for me, then, and let me get this guy out of here.” So I did.

That left me with my mother, who wasted no time. “I must say,” she said, “I see Ned in a different light now. He was provoked, but no man should say those things. About sex in particular. What was it that he wanted to do?”

“If you really want to know,” I said, “I can probably take a pretty good guess. Men watch too much porn, and they think it’s operating instructions. There have been articles about that, if you don’t want to hear it from me.”

“No, thank you,” she said. “On either thing. You know that you don’t have to go along with anything inappropriate, though, don’t you? You’re taking care of yourself?”

“Yes, Mother,” I said, still wanting to laugh. “I’m taking care of myself, and Sebastian’s taking care of me, too. In every possible way.”

She said, “Any further discussion about your sex life is beyond my conversational tolerance, but if it would help for your father to speak to Sebastian?—”

This time, I laughed out loud, then cut it off when she looked offended. “No, thanks, Mother. I can communicate my needs.”

That was when Sebastian opened the door again, locked it behind him, and offered the key fob to my mother. “What did I miss?” he asked.

“You missed,” I said, “my mother offering to have my dad speak to you about having sex with a princess.”

“That is not what I—” my mother said, as Sebastian said, “How about if I talk to the princess instead?”

“And, see,” I told him, “that’s what I said.”

My mother said, “I still need to speak with you, Anastasia. I came up because it was your birthday, and I wanted to give you our gift. And also because I needed to see that you were all right, but now that I’m here, I can see that there are things to discuss.”

“Fine,” I said, because moving my mother was like trying to hold up the sky. “Want your tea warmed up for that?”