Page 39 of Hell Bent (Portland Devils #5)

Honestly, though? I was probably also a tiny bit worried that I couldn’t live up to whatever he was expecting from this.

It was so much … closeness, and I’d never even wanted to live with anybody.

We’d only had sex once, but I’d slept with him three times, and it had been so nice .

You have to admit that’s a weirdly intense level of intimacy, though, and independence was about my most cherished value.

I’d have said it was his, too. We didn’t know what we were doing here, I didn’t need to hurt anybody again, and yet half of me wanted to climb inside his life and stay there.

A few days apart were only prudent. What if he wanted me to stop hanging around so much and had to tactfully ask me? How bad would that be?

Also, he was taking me out tomorrow, since for once, he’d be around a little on my day off.

It would be best to preserve some mystery.

Some excitement. Some delay in finding out what a practical, driven, and resolutely unfeminine person I was, no matter how many lace dresses I bought or how many thongs he fantasized me into.

I had no wiles at all, and was the least likely princess in the world.

Know one reason I normally didn’t tell people, besides that it was so cringeworthy?

Because I knew they’d say, “You?” and laugh in disbelief. I’d been to high school.

Last night had been fun, but it was today, and I was back at work and doing my best to keep my mind on it.

See? I’d slept with the guy one time, and I was already distracted!

But the game had started at one-thirty and would be long over by the time I got back to Sebastian’s place around six, and I kept wondering how it was going, that was all.

At the moment, I was wrestling with electrical tape to fasten a bundle of wires, clumsy in my wet gloves in the dusk, and Carlton was saying, “Robillard talk to you much about the team? How they’re doing?

Probably doesn’t discuss strategy with you, I guess.

Not sure how much you guys are hanging out, either. ”

I said, “What, LouAnn hasn’t kept you abreast of my love life? And here I thought I was such a fascinating topic.”

“I’m not interested in that part,” Carlton said, the tip of his nose red with cold. “Here. I’ll hold the bundle while you tape.”

“Thanks,” I said, a little surprised. Carlton had always seemed more than bemused to have a female foreman.

A first in his life, he’d told me, and I didn’t think he’d done any cartwheels about it.

After a minute, I said, “OK, that’s done it.

Move on down with me. Why wouldn’t he talk about the team with me?

Because I’m a woman? Of course, it could be because I don’t know much about football.

Good thing I don’t like him for that, because other than whether they win and whether he makes his kicks, I’m no judge.

And I don’t care about that part anyway. ” I sure hoped that was true.

LouAnn said from behind me, “Right. You only like that he’s rich and hot. Not that he’s an NFL player and you get to watch him on TV every week being a star and earning all that money. Ugh. Who needs it?”

“And this,” I said, “is why we don’t discuss our personal lives at work. Topic closed.”

“Oh,” Carlton said. “OK.”

I sighed. “If it’s not personal, you can ask. What’s your question?”

“Just wondering what he said about the game today, how they were preparing. Preparing to lose, I’d have said, but the score was 6 to 7 Devils in the third when I checked during my break, so they’re hanging in there.

Weather’s bad, is why it’s so low. Defensive slugfest. Kinda surprised the Devils’ defense is playing that good. Not like they have been before this.”

“I told you guys not to tell me!” I yelped.

“Oh,” he said. “I forgot. Telling you that isn’t much of a spoiler.

One point isn’t much. But I don’t see how the Devils win.

The Bills pay the fans to help shovel the field before the game, that’s how bad it is out there.

No heating element under it, either. Can’t expect Portland to be able to do much in that, not with the wind chill about twelve degrees and gusting, and with the snow making everything slippery.

Robillard’s not going to save the day with some long field goal this time, not in the wind. Not to mention the teams’ records.”

It wasn’t all that warm here either, but my head was heating up anyway under my watch cap and hard hat. “What about their records?” I said. “They’re both in the playoffs, aren’t they? And Sebastian will do fine. He’s a great kicker.”

Carlton blinked at me. “You don’t know how the playoffs work?”

“Of course I know how they work. They play each other, and the winner goes on. And it’s the top, uh …”

“Top fourteen teams out of thirty-two,” he said. “But only twelve play the wild-card game, six from each conference. The top two get to sit it out. That’s why it’s the wild card. Any of the rest can win and go on. Supposedly. Even if they’re not that good.”

“Fine,” I said. “And the Devils aren’t one of the top two. I knew that.” Although I probably hadn’t.

“No,” Carlton said, “they’re at the bottom.

Bills are the Number Two seed in their conference, Devils are Number Seven.

Three and six play each other, and four and five, so those are closer, at least. And they’re playing it in Buffalo, because the team with the better record gets the home game.

I bet on the Bills, not that I’ll get much for it.

Betting line’s too lopsided. I bet on the Devils to make the playoffs and made some money on that, but only about fifty bucks.

Emotional bet, and you can’t afford to get emotional.

I kinda want to know how they feel about it when they lose, though.

Probably not too cut up, since they get about 42K for playing the wild-card game.

Even if they lose, because they get the same for winning or losing.

I don’t get that, but I guess that makes taking the L easier. ”

“I wish somebody would pay me 42K for working one day,” Artie chimed in.

“I bet Robillard has a great car. If I was an NFL player, I’d get one of those car garages with lifts and have a whole collection.

Tom Brady has a Bugatti Verlon Super Sport that cost something like three hundred thousand, and man, that thing is slick.

It goes from 0 to 60 in 2.5 and has a top speed of 265.

He’s also got a Ferrari and a Rolls- Royce Ghost. The Rolls seems like kind of a boring car, just looks like a big sedan, but it probably impresses women.

It has a built-in Champagne cooler, which is good if you like Champagne, I guess. ”

“And if somebody else is driving it,” I said.

“Well, obviously,” Artie said. “Brady has something like fifteen cars. That would be so awesome.”

I didn’t mention Sebastian’s one SUV or Ben’s disgust with it.

It was tempting and always made me laugh, but Sebastian’s life was none of my coworkers’ business.

I wanted to say, “They can so win,” and also, “What, you think it’s fine with them to lose and have their season end and feel like they’ve screwed up in the only way that matters to anybody, just because they make good money?

” but it sounded childish and I was the foreman, so I said, “We’ll see what happens, but nobody’s paying us at all if we don’t keep it moving here.

And if anybody hears who won,” I decided to add, “keep it to yourself.” And did not worry about Sebastian’s feelings.

Even though he didn’t need any more pain in his life.

I was independent, though, and so was he. He was doing his job, I was doing mine, and we both knew how to handle disappointment. That was great. That was fine.

It was fine.