Page 71 of Hate the Game (Playing Dirty #1)

***Savannah***

Iwoke up with Jax’s head between my legs and came hard for what felt like the hundredth time that morning.

My tired and sore body was almost thankful when he said he had to run to practice.

I didn’t want to miss him but if he didn’t give my clit a few minutes to recover I was afraid it would fall off.

Not only that but I didn’t want him to see just how awkwardly I was walking after he’d taken my anal virginity like a damn Viking. I needed to keep some of my pride.

Something happened to me as I was lying on their makeshift bed, enjoying my rest. I looked around the room and decided I couldn’t let them come home to a mess.

It was like Jax had screwed some awful desire to take care of them into me.

I’d come so many times that I felt good enough to want to take care of them.

I got up and pulled one of Cole’s shirts on, since he’d insisted I wear his shirt after he took it off the night before.

I looked around their room and felt some sort of southern belle ghost take over my body.

I wanted to clean but what if I also ordered dinner for us to share that night?

Maybe I’d buy a candle, even though they were banned in the dorms. I was halfway out of my mind, wondering if I could make a dessert like Blaire did for them when I opened the door to cross over to my room.

Cleaning and ordering food without a full face of makeup? The shame!

I was laughing to myself about how dumb I was being when I saw someone in the hall and looked up to see Cass a few feet away.

She’d stopped dead in her tracks and her eyes were focused on the shirt I had on.

I knew that she knew that it was Cole’s and the flash of pain I saw on her face made me feel like shit.

It didn’t matter if it was what Cole wanted.

I didn’t want to rub anything in her face, no matter how mean she’d been to me.

I blushed and stammered, embarrassed and sorry all at once. “I’m sorry, Cass. I didn’t mean to- I wasn’t trying to make you- I’ll take it off. I-”

“You stupid bitch.” She shook as she stepped closer to me. Her eyes were red and filled with tears but there was so much anger behind them that I stepped back and bumped into the guys’ door.

“Cass, I said I’m sorry. I know that-”

“You know something? You know nothing!” She hissed in my face, her voice low. “I’ll fill you in, though, Savannah Lane Ford. The guys know everything. They know you came here to trash them. They know who your brothers are. They’ve known since I told them weeks and weeks ago.”

Even as my stomach dropped my heart held onto hope. They’d known and they still cared about me. That was huge, right? Cass wasn’t done with me, though.

“We weren’t going to let you hurt their reputations so we came up with a plan to get you to see the good in them.

They’ve been laughing at you behind your back because look how easy it was for them to make you give up your beliefs!

You just rolled over for them. I didn’t think they’d take it as far as sleeping with you, though.

” She angrily wiped her face and stepped back.

“I almost feel sorry for you. You fell for them, didn’t you?

You bought it even better than we ever imagined you would.

And now you know that they feel nothing for you, just a desire to protect their reputations from some idiot from Texas with a misguided belief that she could get away with ruining them. ”

Ouch. My heart broke and slammed to the ground with my stomach.

“All of it was fake, Savannah. They don’t want you, not really.”

A flicker of anger brightened. “They don’t want you, either, Cass.”

She froze and we both stood there, breathing hard as we struggled not to break down in front of each other. Finally, she nodded and sniffed. “No. No, they don’t.”

I watched her leave and managed to hold myself together until the door to the stairs clicked shut behind her.

Then I broke. I shoved my way into my room and looked around, entirely lost. She wasn’t lying.

There had been a sudden shift in the guys’ attitudes towards me out of nowhere.

They’d suddenly all wanted to do private interviews and take me to show me things about them that were personal and private.

Things that made me see them entirely differently.

They knew I was a Ford. They knew why I was there originally. They knew it all and they’d played me the way I’d tried to play them. They’d just been better at it.

All the things they’d said… The things we’d done…

They way they’d made me feel… My stomach cramped painfully and I barely made it to the bathroom in time before I was throwing up violently.

I tried my hardest to find some anger but all I got was bone crushing sadness.

I cared about them. I was sure I more than cared about them.

When they’d comforted me and told me they cared about me, I believed them.

But… Cass hadn’t lied. I could see the painful truth in her eyes.

I stumbled to my feet, brushed my teeth, and then went back to my room. I looked at my stuff and wiped my eyes. Once again, I found myself on the verge of running. I didn’t bother packing a bag. I wasn’t sure if Blaire would let me stay after I told her the whole truth.

I barely remembered to put on shorts before leaving.

The twisting in my stomach made me desperate to tell Blaire everything.

I didn’t want her to feel the way I did when I found out the truth about the guys.

She needed to hear everything from me. From the start.

Then, if she still wanted me anywhere near her, I figured I’d beg for forgiveness and try my best to prove to her that I was worth a second chance.

I wasn’t sure I’d survive USC without her.

I wasn’t sure I was going to survive at all.

My chest felt like it was being crushed and no matter how many times I wiped my eyes there were more tears there.

I wanted to throw a tantrum, just throw myself on the ground and kick and scream.

It wasn’t fair. The things I felt about them were bigger than I’d ever experienced.

I liked them. As people, as men, and as potential partners for me.

Just that morning I’d given Jax something I’d never trusted anyone else with.

I wanted them to care about me the way I cared about them but I wasn’t stupid.

They’d done what they had to do to stop me from ruining them.

And if the things they showed me were true, they’d never deserved to be trashed.

I just wished they hadn’t fully sucked me in.

I would’ve realized they weren’t bad men before it was too late.

They took it too far. And once again I’d been left holding the pieces after a man got what h e wanted or needed from me.

When I knocked on Blaire’s door she took one look at me and frowned. “I’m going to have to murder my brother, aren’t I?”

I walked in and turned so I could pull her into a hug. “I have so much to tell you, Blaire, and I just need you to hear me out before you decide to hate me. Please.”