Page 17 of Hate the Game (Playing Dirty #1)

***Savannah***

Icouldn’t get away from Jax fast enough.

When he offered to drop me off at the dorm instead of making me walk back with him I took him up on the offer and only slowed down to grab my food before basically sprinting inside, up the stairs, and into my room.

I stripped out of my dress and wet panties and tossed them into the back of my closet before crawling into bed and burying my face in my pillow.

Screaming, I hoped it would release all of the tension, anger, and guilt threatening to suffocate me.

It didn’t work. I just kept seeing Jax’s burning gaze as he yanked me into his big chest. I could feel his hands on me still. I could still fucking hear the hungry growls he released while consuming me. I wasn’t sure I’d ever forget it.

I felt sick. I hadn’t made out with Jax to work on my revenge plan.

No, that had been all for me. I was disgusted with myself.

My brothers hadn’t crossed my mind once when I was dancing with Jax.

They hadn’t been on my mind when I’d been out with Cole, either.

I was supposed to be gathering information about them.

I was supposed to be looking for ways to take them down.

Instead, I was dry-humping one of them in a bar parking lot.

Shame didn’t even begin to describe what I was feeling.

It just kept growing bigger and bigger, too, because my body was still acting like Jax’s hands were on it.

I’d lost control. Of the situation and of myself.

What was wrong with me? How was I having such a good time with one of the guys who’d hurt my brothers so badly?

I laid in bed staring at my ceiling for so long that I felt like I was going insane.

I needed something to help me sleep. Since I didn’t touch sleeping pills after watching Dad take one when I was young and nearly walk into traffic while naked in the middle of the night, I decided to do the next best thing and take a hot shower.

It was even later than I typically ran into Ryder so I felt like I was safe from the stupid Apex Three for the rest of the night.

I threw on my robe and grabbed my things before sticking my head out the door to make sure there was no one around.

I thought the coast was clear so I slipped out and hurried over to the bathroom.

I was staring back towards the hallway so when I heard someone grunt from in front of me it startled me so much that I swung around too quickly and slipped on the wet tiles. I couldn’t even cry out as I felt myself hurtling towards the floor. I just closed my eyes and hoped I didn’t break my head.

I didn’t hit the ground, though. Instead, I felt two steel bars lock around my waist and yank me back into the air.

My eyes flew open in time to see Ryder’s concerned face and his…

Oh. His towel had fallen off in the fray and before he could pin me to his chest I got quite the eyeful.

It happened so fast that I was almost able to convince myself that I was crazy but then I felt it pressing into my stomach. Oh.

“Are you okay? I didn’t mean to scare you.” He ran his hand over the back of my head and down my back. “I’m sorry.”

I just blinked up at him. His gray eyes weren’t so cold right then.

He looked genuinely worried about me. We were so close that I could feel his warm breath on my lips and see flecks of black towards the center of his irises.

He smelled clean, like soap and mint, and I sniffed a little deeper to really get that scent deep in my brain.

“Savannah?”

I felt the wildly large bulge against my stomach harden and my eyes went wide. I searched his face and opened my mouth to say something but no sound came out. Until it did and then I wished I could take it back. “Oh. Wow.”

Ryder’s pupils dilated and he licked his lips while searching my face. “Savannah.”

It was still growing. Jesus. I knew my face was burning bright but I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t do anything but stare into his eyes that were anything but cold as he stared back at me. His expression was so hungry that my body went even softer against his.

Like an idiot, I opened my mouth again and formed more sounds into words that I should’ve kept to myself. “Um… Ryder? Would you like to go for a one-on-one interview with me, just like Cole and Jax?”

His eyes dropped to my neck and then he was gently putting me back on my own feet and stepping back. Before I could see the monster between his legs again he bent and grabbed his towel. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

I swallowed back my embarrassment and cleared my throat. “Of course. Sure. Makes sense.”

He hesitated and stared down at me for a few moments more before swearing and stomping away. He was holding the towel in front of him to hide his dick but he made no effort to cover his bare ass.

I swooned at the sight of it. He had a great ass.

And a great face. And a great… Never mind.

I forced myself to turn away and hurry to my favorite shower.

It was still wet from Ryder and every moment of what was supposed to be a relaxing shower ended up being torture.

My body ached with a need like I’d never known.

I’d been convinced I was madly in love with Charlie but I’d never burned for him like I’d burned for the three men I was supposed to be taking down. Not once. I’d given him my virginity because it felt like the thing to do but I’d never gotten nearly as wet for him.

I was disturbed. So disturbed that when I got back to my room I still couldn’t sleep and decided a run around campus was a good idea.

I wasn’t a runner. I was barely a fast walker.

It was a sign of the times that I needed to run.

I was losing it. Worse than that, I was losing it and I still had nothing to give to Marla Knight.

Her emails to me were getting more and more demanding. She wanted dirt.

Too bad I’d only managed to get dirty, not dirt.