Page 35 of Forever Finn
“Finn fucking Gallagher.” Kyan grins from the seat opposite me. “Damn, man.” He drains nearly half a bottle of Ryan’s beer as he blatantly checks me out. “If I’d known you batted for my team when we were both at that after party in Brentwood last year…” He leaves the question hanging smiling playfully, and I feel the colour drain from my cheeks.
“That’s not… I’m not…” I stutter.
“Hey, it’s cool, man, you’re not interested. I get it, you’ve got Thor over there.” He points his bottle toward Wyatt. “Not that I can blame you. How long you two been seeing each other?”
The whole garden falls instantly silent and every single eye turns toward me.
“Kyan, honey.” Jin calmly hands him a plate of something. “Put one of these in your mouth immediately, if you can fit it alongside both your feet.”
“I… I’m not… we’re…” I shoot a panicked look at Wyatt who’s watching me in concern. “What makes you think we’re…” I turn to stare at Kyan.
“Dude, the pictures are all over TMZ.” He frowns in confusion.
“Pictures?” I repeat and my stomach drops.
“Yeah,” he replies carefully as he studies me. “Hey, man, I’m sorry. I thought you knew, but it’s blowing up everywhere. I recognized Wyatt as soon as I saw it.”
His voice is just white noise as I fumble in my pocket for my phone, and as I switch it back on, it lights up with dozens of missed calls, messages, and notifications. I ignore all the calls and messages from Simon and Sky and go straight to the social media sites, and there it is in full glorious technicolour, a completely damming photo of me and Wyatt on his balcony. There is no mistaking what is going on.
I know exactly when it was taken. It was the day after we first fucked. I’d stepped out onto the balcony to think, and Wyatt had followed behind me. We’d thought we were alone, clearly not.
I push up from the chair, pacing as I drag my hand through my hair, panic clawing at my throat. The image is of me and Wyatt intimately wrapped around each other. I’m wearing nothing but unbuttoned jeans, leaning back into Wyatt’s naked chest as he spoons up behind me. He’s wearing black boxers, with one arm wrapped around me and his other hand sliding into the front of my jeans as I lean back over my shoulder and kiss him deeply. There is no denying exactly what is going on in this picture and now everyone is going to know and judge. I can’t spin this, I can’t deny it, it’s there as plain as day.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
“Finn.” Wyatt stands slowly, his voice the same low, soothing tone he uses with skittish animals. “Finn, it’s going to be okay.”
“How the hell is this okay?” I shout as I hold up the phone to him. “Everyone knows now. Some arsehole outed me for what? Money? Five minutes of notoriety? My life is over.”
“It isn’t,” he says softly.
“Shit,” Kyan swears under his breath. “I just outed you to your friends, didn’t I?” He glances around at the shocked faces. “I’m so sorry, man, that wasn’t cool. I just figured they knew. I figured this was a safe space for you.”
“It is.” Jesse steps closer seeing the absolute terror and panic etched into my features. “Finn, this is a safe space for you. Are you listening to me? You’re safe here.”
“He’s right, man.” Deak sets down his spatula ignoring his beloved grill, his face uncharacteristically serious. “Finn, we’ve got your back, all of us. No matter what.”
“You have no idea of the shitstorm that’s about to come down on me.” I shake my head angrily. “They are going to tear me to shreds over this. My life is over.”
“It’s not.” Wyatt tries to calm me, but it only makes me angrier. They just don’t understand.
“Do you have any idea what it’s still like for gay actors in Hollywood? Especially ones who look like me. No one wants to see an action hero who likes getting his arse ploughed. My career is over and that’s not even getting started on the ripple effect once the media go into a feeding frenzy. Not only is my entire life about to be dissected and put under a microscope, do you have any idea how this is going to impact Sky? They think we’re a couple, they think I’ve cheated on her and lied to her for years. I can’t tell them the truth without exposing her, and I won’t do that.”
“Finn, son.” Garrett steps up, his deep soothing voice rippling over me, but instead of reassuring and comforting me, it just hurts more. “Take a breath, we’ll work this out. No one’s saying it’s going to be easy on you, but Jesse and Deak are right, we’ve all got you. We’ll protect you no matter what. You’re not alone.”
His words tear me open and leave me bleeding because he wouldn’t be saying that if he knew the truth about Cody. The thought of him draws my gaze to Reed who has remained quiet.
“Finn,” he says quietly when our eyes lock. “How long have you known you were bi?”
“I’m not.” I swallow tightly. “Sky and I have only ever been best friends. She’s always known the truth about me.” I draw in a shaky breath my chest tight with pain and panic. “I’m gay. I’ve known since I was a kid.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispers. “All that time we spent together you, me, and Cody. Did you think I wouldn’t understand? That I wouldn’t accept you? Because you’re wrong. I love you just the way you are.”
“Don’t.” I choke at the wave of pain Cody’s name brings.
“It’s true,” he continues. “And Cody would’ve understood too.”
“He didn’t,” I whisper.