Page 41 of Forever Finds Us (Wisper Dreams #7)

Chapter Thirty-Three

Roxanne

My sister’s name and her kids’ faces flashed on my phone.

It was a picture her husband Drew had taken of them at Disney World.

She said the kids had pooped out after that picture, and all hell had broken loose in the middle of the “Happiest Place on Earth” with meltdowns and tantrums and blood sugar plunges.

She wasn’t the oldest of my sisters, but Maureen had always tried to mother me. She was only two years older than me, but it was just her nature.

Answering the call, I tried to put on my usual chipper, happy front. “Hey, sis. How are you?”

“What’s wrong? We haven’t heard from you in the group chat for a while. Are you okay?”

I sighed. My fake happiness lasted, like, three seconds. I’d known one of my sisters would be calling soon to demand I tell them everything about my life. Sisters were like that.

“Yeah, sorry. I’ve just been busy with work and… you know.”

“No,” she said, “I don’t know, so tell me. What’s up with you?”

“It’s nothin’. I broke up with a guy. I’m just a little down, is all.”

“Oh, Riri, I’m sorry. Was he a jerk?”

No. No he’s not a jerk at all. He’s everything , and now he’s gone.

Technically, he wasn’t “gone.” Brand was still in Wisper.

I heard his sister over the last few weeks talking about him and their family.

She’d said he’d chosen the plot of land he wanted to build his house on.

His house. The house he’d told me could be ours when we’d lain in bed all night, fucking, dreaming, and planning our imaginary future.

But now I knew Brand was moving on. He hadn’t liked that I’d challenged him about his brother and the disease their relationship had nurtured in them both, and it seemed he wasn’t prepared to change or do anything different than he had been doing for years.

Where could I even fit into that?

I couldn’t, and Brand must have realized it, too, and that was why he hadn’t come banging on my door, asking for my forgiveness. And just like all the other men in my past, maybe Brand had realized that the fucking was all he really wanted from me anyway.

Who builds a house for a woman he’s known less than two months?

The one-two-threes had come back with a vengeance, and I tapped the side of my leg now so hard, I probably left bruises.

I had avoided conversations with Abey at all cost. She demanded to know what had happened between her brother and me, but I told her it just hadn’t worked out. When she prodded for more information, I said it was too painful, which was the truth, and that I needed time.

Even after he broke my heart, I couldn’t bring myself to betray Brand’s and Dixon’s confidences, but it was eating away at me.

To avoid further questioning, I took a week off work after Thanksgiving and did nothing but ingest dangerous amounts of carbs and sodium while I binge-watched all five seasons of Yellowstone , every Jurassic Park/World movie ever made, and Little House on the Prairie episodes until I started considering getting rid of my TV and phone and living like Teton Tom or Laura Ingalls.

“No,” I said, “he’s not a jerk. It just didn’t work out.”

As much as I wanted to be with Brand, I knew the trust was gone. If he hadn’t lived up to his promises in the short time we’d been together, how could I expect him to do it in the future?

Had I asked too much of him? His family’s issues were big, and they’d been building for a long time. Was it wrong to ask him to face them for me? For us?

Was there ever really an “us?”

“Riri, come home for Christmas. I know you’ve got work, but we all miss you. Can’t you just take a few days? You haven’t hugged the kids in two years. Let your family love and support you. Sounds like you need it this year.”

But Maureen didn’t understand. She had the perfect life with the perfect little family and a perfect husband.

If she made a mistake, everybody forgave her and moved on.

But I didn’t have a man to absorb my shock, so when I made a mistake, it became fodder for my sisters, their husbands, my parents, and even some of my older nieces and nephews.

I was tired of showing up at home with my tail between my legs, having failed once again at finding anyone to love me. And it was too painful to pretend it didn’t matter, that being alone was all hunky dory and happy dances. It fucking wasn’t.

When I wasn’t in love, it had been hard enough. But now…

“I don’t know,” I said. “I’ll think about it.”

“Okay.” Maureen sighed. “Honestly, that’s more than I was expectin’ from you, but I really hope you come. I’ll give you a big hug, and you know bein’ around the kids would lift your spirits.”

“Yeah.” She was right about that. I missed their cute, smiling faces, all fifteen of them.

“I have to go,” she said. “Someone’s knockin’ on my door, but call me if you decide you wanna come home. I’ve got some airline points you can probably use.”

“Thanks.”

“Love you, Riri. Bye.”

“Love you too.”

The person at my door didn’t bother to knock. She just barged in like she always did.

“Hey, Aubs,” I said, clicking off my phone and flopping onto my couch, watching her lug two bags from the Food Mart into my kitchen. “Whatcha got there?”

“Pick-me-up food,” my best friend said, and she disappeared behind my fridge door.

“Thanks, but I’m not really hungry.”

When she emerged from the depths of the old appliance that probably needed a good scrubbing out and the door slammed shut, the new bottle of whiskey on top of the fridge rattled, and it reminded me of the old bottle that used to be up there, until Brand had poured it over me and sucked it from my body.

Gah! Roxi, quit it! He’s gone, and he’s not coming back. He’s not your prince. He’s not your anything.

When she walked into the living room, Aubrey had a bottle of red wine in one hand, a bag of white cheddar popcorn tucked under her arm, and her favorite dark chocolate quinoa crisps Rye had introduced her to.

“Gimme,” I said, holding my hand out for the popcorn.

She tossed me the bag and flopped onto the couch opposite me, lifted her short legs, and rested them over mine.

“Shitty day?” she asked, eyeing the tent-sized pajamas I’d changed into after work and the greasy hair framing my face I hadn’t bothered to wash this morning.

“Yep. And my sister just called. She wants me to go home for Christmas. Said she has travel points I can use if I want.”

“Why don’t you? You never do anything nice for yourself.”

I snorted. “You think showin’ up at my parents’ depressed and still husband-less is nice ?”

She crunched her crisps and swigged the wine right from the bottle. “You know what I mean. Go somewhere, get out of your head.”

“Gimme those,” I said, holding my hand out for the bag of crisps. When she tossed it onto my lap, I grabbed a handful and stuffed four or five of the crunchy treats in my mouth.

Aubrey shuddered. “Ew. Dark chocolate and cheddar popcorn do not go together.”

Actually, now that she mentioned it, the combination kind of tasted like puke in my mouth. I threw the crisps back to her and held out my hand for the wine.

As I took a chug, she said, “I saw Brand today,” and I almost choked on it.

Wiping my mouth with the back of my hand, I asked, “Where?”

“At the ranch. He was with Bax and Rye.”

“Oh. Well, how’d he, you know, look?”

“Haunted and miserable,” she assured me definitively.

“I know you’re lyin’, but thanks.”

She smiled. “He looked the same as he always does. But I will say that it felt like somethin’ has changed with him. I couldn’t tell what it might be when I talked to him, but?—”

“You talked to him?” I asked, pulling my legs out from beneath hers. Her feet fell to the floor, and we both sat up.

“Yeah. Well, I yelled at him, actually.”

“What? Why?”

“Because, Roxi, he broke my best friend’s heart.”

I wanted to pummel her, but she was the best damn friend I could ever hope to have.

“What did you say? What did he say?”

“He didn’t say much, but I said a lot. I told him you were the best thing to ever happen to him and that he’s an idiot for lettin’ you go.”

“And?”

“And he agreed with me.”

Somehow, that made me feel worse. If he was oblivious as to why he’d lost me, at least then I could blame my heartache on his stupidity.

But Brand was anything but stupid, so I felt certain he knew exactly what had gone wrong between us. I’d been pretty clear back on his friend’s jet, and he’d heard every word.

So if he was admitting to Aubrey that he’d made a mistake, then why wasn’t he doing anything to fix it?