Page 21

Brad

A lex sat on his bed, waiting for me like a messed-up supervillain when I got back.

I had to put up with Coach laying into me for ages before they let me go. Then I had to shoot drills for two hours by myself like an absolute moron.

I mean, Lance wasn’t hurt that badly, but I wasn’t going to get away with it just because I said sorry.

I’d managed to fix the disaster I’d made after our seriously hot kiss in the kitchen that I was determined to find a way to repeat, but I’d fucked it up all over again. So, I was going to be super duper apologetic. Like, Alex would never find someone better at apologizing than me. I was going to apologize so hard, he’d never have a better apology in his whole life.

Sighing, I rubbed the back of my neck as I pushed open the door to our room in the hotel. The sun was just setting, and shadows were growing in the room. I assumed Alex was off with Lance, or whatever the hell he did without me nowadays.

I hit the lights while my brain still buzzed with all the shit I wanted to say to him. I didn’t even know what I wanted. I just wanted him to stop leaving me by myself.

“Brad.” His voice bounced around the room and I swear I jumped ten feet in the air.

My gaze snapped to his, meeting his dark eyes, ripping my breath away as my heart rate went from 0 to 100 in a second.

“Holy shit! Dude, what the fuck are you doing?”

He loomed on his small single bed, his legs spread, bent forward with his elbows on his knees. His fingers knotted in front of his mouth as he glared at me. It was the tight shorts strained around his thighs and the loose shirt curving over his shoulders that threw me off even more.

It was a pretty cramped space; two single beds with a bathroom bigger than our kitchen just to our right. Nice and cozy, and awkward enough for two big guys to bump into each other constantly. Just like home.

“I’ve been waiting for you,” he said. The edge in his voice sounded like he had plans. Plans such as giving me a thrashing for beating up his not-boyfriend.

I stepped inside, letting the door bang behind me. “Don’t say it like that, man. You sound super creepy,” I said as I walked the whole six feet to my bed under the window.

I had to get in close to him to dump my bag on it. There was only about a foot between the sides of the beds. He leaned back, at least enough so my cock didn’t press into his face.

He turned his away, scowling as a subtle blush dusted his cheeks.

“Are you hurt?” he asked in a slightly less pissed tone.

“What?” I asked numbly.

His head swung back around, and he tilted his chin, looking straight up at me. I could see his mouth moving as he carried on talking, and he was definitely getting annoyed again, but I couldn’t hear him. I was swamped with the realization that I could literally just push at his head and he could take my cock.

Shit, my horny was too strong around him.

I mean, he might hate me forever if I asked him to, but, fuck. He was right there.

“Brad!” he barked, surging upward. “Are you even listening to me?”

“W-What? Yeah, of course,” I blustered, praying he didn’t ask me to repeat anything because I literally had no idea. I threw him a grin, sort of knowing already that he caught me, but I wasn’t sure if he knew why.

I was totally caught by him as he surged upwards, getting right in my space.

My cock pulsed as he was suddenly so close that his scent rode my nose again.

My chest ached, but it wasn’t the worst. I’d crashed full-bodied into Lance, and fell with him onto the ice before we slammed into the barrier. But I’d got him with my right side, and he was probably still wheezing.

Asshole.

I froze as Alex’s fingers suddenly danced up the curve of my bicep. My heart caught at the feel of his hard fingers against harder muscle. I was only in a tee, still warm from showering after the drills, but Alex’s touch felt so much hotter.

Until he pressed his thumb against the top of my collarbone, and I winced again as he got me good.

“How bad is it?” he asked, his brows knit as he scanned my body like a sexy X-ray machine.

I searched for a reply, but I was totally distracted by the fact that his lips were a couple of inches from my neck. And now his dick was closer to mine as he shuffled around.

It was like he was teasing me.

He wasn’t acting any different, but I was so aware of him that I wanted to step back, just in case I did the thing I’d been thinking about nonstop since we stopped doing the thing.

“It’s totally fine, you don’t need to worry,” I rasped. I tried to say it in my usual ultra-cool way, but I was failing so goddamn hard.

Alex’s gaze swept over the line of my neck, and the big fucking bruise growing there.

I tilted my head back to meet his eyes, my fingertips trembling. Even though it was lame that nerves were kicking up in front of my best friend, I preferred that over him laying into me with one of his ‘reasonable’ conversations.

But his thumb hit just the right spot, and a tight knot that regularly got twisted on my shoulder popped, releasing a rush of pain.

“Fuck,” I moaned, my eyes closing as I reached up a hand and clasped his wrist. Just wrapping my hand around it reminded me of how I grabbed his cock back then. And I needed to beat those thoughts back with a stick if I was going to apologize properly.

“I said it’s fine,” I mumbled, using it as an excuse to look away from him. “You don’t need to worry about it.”

It wasn’t much. He was just bending over me, his angry look eating into me, but it was as sexy as fuck, too.

Alex shifted, his wide chest nearly knocking off of mine as his other hand came up and rested on my pec. I pulled in a breath. I was sure he was going to push me back on the bed and mount me. Or he was thinking about it, at least.

Or maybe I was hoping it, because I’d gone from jealous and possessive to hungry in the space of a few hours. Working myself up during my drills didn’t help, either. He ground against my collarbone with his thumb again, aggressively massaging me, the sting really driving it home that I’d fucked up.

He hummed as he scanned my face, and it was obvious he totally didn’t believe me when I said I was okay.

“Who said I was worrying? Maybe I just want to make sure you’re as hurt as Lance is,” he said.

I didn’t know what the hell was going on, but one minute I was giving him a goofy grin, the next my heart was pounding in my throat like a motherfucker.

“I’m pretty sure I got him good.” I chuckled. As soon as the words came out, I instantly knew that was the absolute worst thing I could have said.

I was meant to be apologizing .

I flicked my gaze back to Alex, disappointed with myself as I met his scowl, growing deeper by the second.

“What did Coach say? Are you still on for games?”

“Yeah, I’m playing all week. I’m too good to bench.”

“If you were that good, we wouldn’t be here right now,” he said quietly, and the reminder hit me right where it hurt the most. “And I wouldn’t be waiting here, scared out of my mind that you had ruined it all.”

“But you’re the one who was all over Lance,” I answered back straight away, like that was a reasonable excuse why I went for him, even though it was the truth.

He jabbed his thumb even harder, right into the softest part of my skin.

“Hey!” I shouted out.

“Stop complaining. You’re lucky Lance isn’t beating the shit out of you for that stunt you pulled.”

“Like he could take me,” I grumbled as another spike of jealousy pulsed through me, about as sharp as the pain of the stretch on my neck.

“Brad.” Alex’s voice eased as his thumb moved from my collar just so he could grip my shoulder. “What are you doing? Seriously?” He sighed. “We’re going to the NHL together, aren’t we? The scouts are going to be here all week, and you might have screwed up your chance to get drafted because… Well, I don’t know… But what am I going to do if I have to go without you?”

Alex bit his lip, and even though what he was saying felt seriously important, I was so distracted by the way he grazed it with his teeth.

“You’re my best friend, yeah? So, act like my friend,” he said.

A fresh round of guilt stabbed me in my already racing heart as I forced my eyes from his lips to meet his gentle, worried expression.

I needed to wipe that away. I had to do something so he believed I still wanted to go with him. Because it was more important now than ever.

There were still rumors about Lance, that he was waiting for more offers, that he wanted to finish college first. No one had said anything about him getting an offer from the Wranglers, but it still hung over me.

I knew I was lucky Alex waited a year for me. And I couldn’t disappoint him.

How was I going to deal if next year I was sitting in front of the TV watching Alex and Lance skate together without me?

“Why did you do it, Brad? I know you didn’t lose control—none of us believed that. So, why now, out of all the times we played together? Why did you do that to Lance?”

His brow creased as my mouth opened, but no words came out.

Because I don’t like the way you smile at him, I don’t like the way he touches you, and I don’t like the way he walks around like he owns the place. And I hate how he knows more about that part of your life than I do.

Alex shook his head, turning again to push past me. As soon as he was free, I shot out a hand, grabbing his wrist before I lost him forever.

“Wait, where are you going?”

“I’m meeting Lance,” he replied, tugging at his wrist. “I’ll be back later, okay?”

“No,” I said instantly. “No, it’s not okay. We’re talking right now, so don’t go.”

Instead of being determined not to look at me by staring at the wall, Alex’s eyes flicked around the room, awkwardly hopping from one thing to another. The only thing he missed was me.

“Why shouldn’t I go?” He finally spoke, but I could barely hear him, even at just an arm’s length away. “I’ve got someone who actually wants to be with me, and he’s honest about why.”

I sucked in a breath as it happened again.

My brain froze, everything disappeared from it apart from one question I couldn’t get out of my mouth.

I’d never been shy with him, or nervous, or felt weird around him, not since the summer. Alex was my friend, my best friend, and I would say that again and again until he got what that meant to me.

I let out a slow, shuddering breath as Alex’s heavy gaze finally landed on me.

So, after everything we'd been through together, why did he like Lance and not me?

“Why did you tell him, Alex? Why did you tell Lance that you were gay and not me? We’ve basically been together forever—didn’t you think you could trust me?”

Alex pressed his lips in a tight line. “There’s a reason I didn’t tell you,” he replied through gritted teeth.

“But I would have totally understood. If you’d just told me earlier, I wouldn’t have had a problem with it.”

I stepped closer toward him, nearly trapping his hand between us. I was determined not to let go until he told me why Lance was more special to him than me.

“Why?” I asked, wishing he would turn so I could properly face him. “Why didn’t you tell me, Alex? Please, I want to know.” I’d beg him if I had to.

“Don’t you remember what you said last summer?” he suddenly snapped. “Don’t you remember how you acted after you… When you…” He really looked like he was going to collapse. “Why would I tell you anything when you called me a freak afterward?”

“What? What are you talking about? You mean when I sucked you off?”

Alex released a slow breath, looking like he was in so much pain that I had to act. Like hold his hand, or hug him, or do something so he’d stop looking like he was going to break.

“Come on, you know that was just me helping you out with a first. I’m sorry, man, I wasn’t calling you a freak. I was just weirded out by the whole thing.” I just wanted him to stop looking so hurt. “Alex, I swear, I didn’t mean it. And don’t you think that means I would have got it more than anyone else? Because of that?”

“Not like Lance does,” he said after a beat, his voice nearly cracking. He looked so fucked up, and it was totally my fault.

“You can’t say you understand, Brad. You don’t get what it’s like to have to hide yourself.”

I stopped moving, just looking at him and his stupid long brown hair and his fucking pretty eyes that avoided me with everything he had.

“Then don’t, Alex,” I said, so close I was nearly pressing myself up against him. “Come on, I want to see every little bit of you. I want you to show me everything.”

Alex pursed his lips, looking away from me, the hand under my wrist clenching hard. The spike of pain was nothing if it meant I could fix it.

“Please don’t push me, Brad. I’m not that strong.”

I reached out, wrapping my fingers around his bicep, nudging him. My thighs were almost on his, and I was so close that I could see flecks of green in his eyes as I brought him back, making him look at me.

“I’m sorry, Alex. I just want to be there for you.” And touch you, and kiss you, and be the one to fuck you first, because I can’t stand the idea that someone might take that from me—from us.

Alex’s head dropped as I continued, “I just want to help. And I know I was a dick back then, but I swear I can do better. I’ll be better than Lance.”

“Yeah, but ask yourself why you care, Brad.” His glare came back with full force as he flexed under me. “Why does it matter if I like someone when you’ve had girlfriends before?”

“Because I…I…” My mouth flapped wordlessly as anger swept across Alex’s face. “I just want…”

“For God’s sake,” Alex growled, and the sound was so sexy it went straight to my cock. But I didn’t have any time to react when Alex suddenly yanked my shoulder. I gasped as he tugged me to him, his lips crashing into mine.

And then he was on me, smothering me in his arms, leading the kiss as I melted under him. I moaned, the noise echoing in our hollow mouths as I opened up and gave myself to him.

It was what I’d been after for days. Lying in bed, hoping he would somehow leave himself vulnerable so I could push him against the counter or the door or take him in the shower or do something to make sure he didn’t give it all to Lance.

“Oh fuck,” I groaned before he licked my bottom lip and plunged back into me. It was just like before, like he was trying to absorb me. He was so bad at kissing, and it just turned me on even more. Because it meant I could teach him, and there was only one way to learn.

I loved how enthusiastic he was, but his teeth hit against mine and I knew he needed some proper loving. And I was so, so happy to give it to him.

I let go of him, but just so my hands could go straight to his waist, and I dragged his hips to mine.

“You feel that, Alex? What do you think? Do you like having my cock pressed against you?”

His eyes widened, mixed with lust and fear, but he didn’t answer. I wanted to hear him say that he liked my cock, but he just scowled before throwing himself back in with another sloppy kiss that made my knees weak.

He groaned, his fingers digging into my back, filling me with satisfaction. If I was making him feel this good just by pressing my cock against him, Alex was going to go wild the second I got him on his back. With a bed either side of us, we were spoiled for choice.

Because that’s where this was going, wasn’t it? He wasn’t just going to kiss me if he didn’t want something more. The only reason we stopped the other day was because I fucked it up by saying something stupid. But not this time. Not with his short gasps just inches from my ears, holding on to me like I was the only thing keeping him sane.

I wouldn’t say a single fucking word to screw it up this time. This was it. Maybe I wouldn’t punch his V card tonight, but I was gonna get him to a place where he was so hot he’d let me suck his dick and make him cry out so loud I’d taste his sweet sounds as he came.

“You are seriously so sexy,” I said before I took his bottom lip between my teeth, sucking on him, slowing him down as my hands crept over his high hip bones and finding his tight muscled ass. “Just keep moaning like that for me.”

“You’re moaning more than me,” he pointed out as I ran kisses over his chin, clutching his perky bubble butt that fit perfectly into my hands.

He made a tiny moan against my lips, giving me my answer. My cock strained as I rubbed against him.

“Tell me who's moaning more. Do you like it when I grab your ass, Alex?”

I just wanted this. To make him shake and moan under me so that he was totally weak. So he couldn’t do anything without me.

“I like it, Brad,” he whispered so quietly I had to press myself against him to hear. He bent his hips to push his ass into my hands. “I love it when you touch me.” He sighed as he naturally leaned into me.

That was the kind of shit I wanted to hear.

Fuck Lance and his fucking smile. I was the one Alex wanted.

He couldn’t moan and kiss me like that and not want to take it further.

And right there, just as we were getting deeper into it, his phone pinged from the bed behind him, and I flinched. I broke away to make sure he was paying attention to me. I didn’t want to lose him when we were finally so close.

“Fuck,” I swore. His wet lips, the angry fire in his eyes, the way his throat bobbed as he swallowed the taste of our kiss. It was fucking mind-blowing.

“What’s wrong? Have you had enough?” he asked, and his look of distrust returned to full volume.

“Fuck no.” I shook my head. “Absolutely no way am I done with you, man. I’m just trying to wrap my head around how you can be so fucking hot,” I said just before I launched myself back into him.

I didn’t need to prepare or get over the shock or whatever. I was totally there, pretty much fucking him with my mouth like I should have done a few days ago. Making sure my cock stayed firm against him, keeping my hands fixed on his ass, holding him up as he broke the kiss to shudder.

“Brad…” he gasped, falling onto my shoulder. “Brad, you need to go harder.”

“God, yeah, Alex. Yeah, I do. You taste so perfect. You taste like a fucking dream,” I said before I started laying precise kisses on his neck. I wanted him to feel every single second and know this was exactly what I wanted to be doing.

His phone pinged again, and Alex froze under me.

My heart dropped straight to the fucking ground because I knew what was coming.

I didn’t want to ask him. But it wasn’t like before where I couldn’t push the words out. It was because I already knew the answer, and I didn’t want him to say it.

“Who’s that?” I murmured against the sharp line of his jaw as I trailed kisses back to his mouth.

I kissed him again to stop him from answering, even though I was the one who asked him.

Alex pulled away from me, just as his phone pinged for the third time. He sighed, his lips snapping together as he stepped back from me, but I held on to his ass and made sure he stayed.

It wasn’t a content sigh, it was more like he was done with me and my bullshit.

“Come back here. I want to taste even more of you,” I demanded.

But I didn’t get a chance, because his hands slipped from my shoulders.

“And are you going to tell me why?” he asked.

The air suddenly shifted around him, and my horny, needy best friend was back on the defensive

“Cause I want to.” I mumbled, weirded out about how I actually felt embarrassed. It wasn’t like it was a strange thing. It was the same as sucking his dick back then. I did it because he needed it.

“Right, so it’s just because I’m hot and sexy and whatever else you said? It’s all because you’re horny, right? And nothing else?”

“Well, yeah. Why? Didn’t you like it?”

His eyebrows shot up instantly, his eyes widening as his phone pinged for the last time.

Alex's brow crinkled. “You’re really ridiculous, you know that?” he rasped, his gaze falling from me again.

I didn’t know what I’d done wrong. He wanted it; he literally told me he loved it. What was the problem?

“Was it really that bad? You were the one who kissed me.”

Alex yanked himself out of my grip, hard enough that I almost lost my balance.

He swiped his phone from the bed, bending over in the most dangerous position he could when I had a boner and his sweats stretched over his ass.

If I hadn’t made it so awkward, I could have ground my dick on him and saw how much he liked that.

But he was already striding to the door before I could even react to the thoughts.

“Are you still going?” I asked, my voice hoarse.

“I’ve got to check Lance is okay, too,” he said without a glance.

“Wait, what?” All the pleasure from sucking on his tongue vanished in an instant. “You’re really just leaving after that?”

“Yeah, Brad, I’m just leaving. I’m not sticking around here while you make up your mind based on how ‘hot’ I am.”

“But I want to—”

“No, you don’t,” he said, cutting me off with a scowl. “Whatever it is you’re about to say, just don’t. Maybe you think you do. But you don’t suddenly wake up one morning and decide you want me.” He looked at me like he was going to explode.

Why was he so angry? Was the kiss really that terrible? I was sure I wasn’t acting like I had after the blow job, so why was he still upset?

“Alex?”

“Just think about it, okay? Think about what you’re actually doing with me.” He opened his mouth to say something else, but a darker expression appeared before he shook his head again.

His brow creased, and he gave me one more hurt look before he turned. Three steps to the door, a creak of the hinges, a heavy slam, and Alex was gone, leaving me with burning lips and a cock that needed relief.

That was seriously the worst apology ever.