Page 24 of Fireworks

Maddie rolled her eyes, getting up in a huff of aggravation. Collin threw his hands up.

“Don’t shoot the messenger.”

Brian was Maddie’s twin brother, and the two of them couldn’t be more alike. Finishing one another’s sentences and being able to have an entire conversation without saying a single word. Going away to college would be the first time they were ever going to be apart, and neither of them wanted to admit that they feared losing the security their company brought to one another.

Rubbing the back of his neck, Collin shifted nervously as he moved closer to me on the chair.

“Can we talk for a minute?”

I looked up from my phone.

“Yeah sure. What’s up?”

Placing my phone down beside me, I twisted my torso toward him, giving him my full attention.

“So, you know this summer has been really fun.”

I nodded in agreement, unsure of where he was going with this.

“I had an idea. It’s going to sound crazy, I know. Trust me, I debated talking to you about it for a while. What if we didn’t end this when school starts? Our schools aren’t that far from one another, and this has been fun. I care about you Katie and, well, I don’t want what we have to end. I don’t want to lose you and what we have.”

I pulled my hair back as my voice refused to form words. I was afraid that this might happen.

“I really like you Katie, and this isn’t just for fun for me. It never was.”

Licking my lips, I looked around, wondering if anyone around us could hear or see what we were discussing. My voice lowered. I didn’t want to hurt him. It was the furthest thing from my mind.

“Collin, we had an agreement. It was just for the summer.”

Placing my hand on his, the look on his face changed to one pleading with me to accept his proposal.

“Well, we can change the agreement, can’t we? Being with you like this was going to be enough for me, I thought. I want more Katie. I want all of you and not just in the way you think. I can’t stop thinking about you every day and what you’re doing when you aren’t with me. Wondering if you’re ever thinking of me.”

I could feel my chest tightening as he spoke. He was a great guy, but I wasn’t looking for what he was right now. He was happy to go to community college and raise a family here. I wanted… well; I wanted more.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

He looked back at me, his eyes narrowing before his gaze shifted down.

“What did you expect me to say? That I’ve been in love with you since I was 13? You would have laughed in my face if I ever told you how I felt. I figured if I spent time with you over the summer, maybe you would see it too. How we are meant to be together.”

My lower lip curled in as I bit down.

“Collin, I don't know what to say.”

“Say that you don’t want this to end either, just because we’re starting school soon. That I’m not crazy and this wasn’t just for fun.”

I wanted to tell him it wasn’t just for fun. I didn’t want to break his heart or the friendship that we had for so long.

“Collin I just, it’s not that I don’t care about you. I do. But, this was just for the summer. I can’t be dating when I start school. I need to focus on my classes. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us to keep this going when my plate is already going to be full. You know how I am. I wouldn’t be able to be there for you the way you want me.”

He looked back at me. I could see his heart break as I spoke. I didn’t want to hurt him. That was the very last thing I would ever want to do to him.

He got up and stormed off without saying another word. I couldn’t blame him. More than just his ego got hurt with that one. I knew what it felt like to be rejected, but it wasn’t my fault. I made my intentions clear at the start. There was no way that I was planning on beginning school with a boyfriend. I didn’t need that type of distraction in my life.

Running my hands through my hair, I closed my eyes, knowing I just ruined our friendship. Rubbing my face, I reached down for my phone as I felt it buzz next to me.

Nate: Everything okay?