Page 2 of Find Me

Around both of my wrists and ankles were inch-wide scars. I supposed I’d given those to myself. For hours, I’d rubbed my skin raw and bloody in order to escape from the tight rope bindings Mr. X had put me in.

Just by looking at my wrists, one could guess how I had gotten them. They always guessed wrong, though. Back in Alaska, each time we’d driven to the closest town for supplies, I would receive lewd stares from men, and one time in line at the grocery store, an old lady had called me a sexual deviant. Everyone around us, even the cashier, had frozen and glued their gazes on me. Mortified, I’d dropped my basket of groceries and practically run out of the store. I regretted how cowardly I had acted. I wished I could have been more like Shayla in that moment. She would have flicked her colorful hair, looked that old lady in the eye, grinned, and said, “Jealous?” But I wasn’t as strong as my sister had been. At least not yet. I was working on it. Until I found that strength, I refused to leave the house without wearing clothes that covered my scars, no matter the temperature outside. Just thinking about the heat, I started to second guess my move to Arizona. Only a tiny bit, though. It was beautiful here, with its breathtaking mountain views and vast deserts.

I dropped my jacket on the ground and took the leather gun holster from my uncle before slipping my arms through the holes. The straps rested over my shoulders and across my back, allowing the small holstered gun to hide between my left arm and ribs. Logan glanced down to make sure my slim black GPS anklet tracker was around my right ankle, then back up to the holster before I covered it with my jacket. I caught him taking me in from head to toe. I twirled around for him because I knew he was memorizing my appearance and exactly what I was wearing in case I didn’t come back.

“Don’t forget your phone,” he said.

I opened my mouth to argue, then snapped it closed.Crap!I’d left it in my room. I would’ve noticed I didn’t have it eventually. It was my source of music and who ran without music? I dashed back into my room to grab it and my Bluetooth earbuds. When I walked back into the living room, Logan wasn’t there. I didn’t search him out to say goodbye. Instead, I walked out the front door, put my earbuds in, selected my running playlist, and stuffed my phone into the snug side pocket of my leggings.

It was gray out. Standing on the front lawn, I could see the rays from the sun shining from behind the mountains as I did a few stretches. After I was warmed up, I headed north through the neighborhood.

* * *

Three and a half hours later, I slowed to a jog on my way back to the house. I was soaked with sweat and my breathing was labored and raspy. Logan was sitting on the top step of the porch waiting for me while texting on his phone and sipping coffee from a Styrofoam cup.

Note to self, pick up coffee mugs today.

He looked up at me as I paced the front lawn with my hands on my hips, trying to cool down. He shook his head. “If you quit smoking you wouldn’t sound like shit.”

“I’m down to one cigarette a day,” I wheezed before bending over with my hands on my knees. “I think I’m going to puke.”

Three and half hours was a new record for me. I knew all the ins and outs of my new neighborhood now. It was a big one and my new house was smack dab in the middle. I had ventured down all the streets, passing my house a few times, and when I’d started to feel like I was going to throw up I’d known it was time to stop.

“You pushed yourself too far,” my uncle admonished.

I didn’t argue. I did, however, ignore the disapproving look he was giving me as I focused on breathing. He didn’t approve of my “therapeutic methods” but wasn’t the type to dissuade me either.

“Your furniture should be here in a few hours,” he added.

Apart from a few boxes already here that held personal things like clothes, toiletries, and memorabilia from before I went into WITSEC, I’d had to order furniture to fill the rest of the house. It was scheduled to arrive later this morning.

I’d been able to purchase all of it and this house with some of the life insurance money I had received from both of my parents and my sister after they’d been killed. It wasn’t the only money that had been left to me, but I liked to pretend that money didn’t exist. It was blood money to me, and I didn’t like having it. I didn’t like having the life insurance money either, but Logan had convinced me to use it. He explained that my family had gotten life insurance for a reason and that was to make sure I was taken care of. So I compromised. I’d live off the life insurance money until I finished college and got a job. If I budgeted properly it’d last me until then and I could continue on pretending the rest of my family’s money didn’t exist.

“Why don’t you go shower and then we’ll get breakfast?” Logan suggested. “Yesterday, you said you were craving crepes. Want to go somewhere that makes them?”

I frowned. Logan was a bona fide drill sergeant. If he wasn’t ordering me about, something was up. Acting apprehensive was his tell. “If you got something to say, just say it.”

His eyes locked with mine and I instantly became nervous. I knew whatever he had to tell me wasn’t good.

“Ian called.” Ian was his superior and the only other soul who knew my whereabouts. “They got a lead. Highway patrol pulled a man over matching X’s description in North Carolina a few days ago. The cop radioed in for backup, but they didn’t get there in time. X fled. The cop was DOA. Ian’s calling me in to help.”

DOAmeantdead on arrival.My stomach churned, making the urge to throw up even stronger. North Carolina was on the other side of the country, yet it still felt like I was within his reach. As long as he was out there, I didn’t think anywhere in the world would feel safe.

I tried to appear calm. On the inside I was freaking out. “When do you leave?”

He stared at me intently, as if he could see past my fake bravado to my terrified soul. “Friday.”

That was four days from now. The following Monday was my first day at my new school. I was going to complete my senior year and if everything went as planned, I was going to try and get into a university nearby. Even though my life had been forever changed and my parents were gone, I was still determined to complete my goals and make them proud.

“I know Friday is a lot sooner than we planned, but we prepared for this,” he said.

I couldn’t tell if he was trying to reassure me or himself.

2

My furniture delivery was late.The truck didn’t get here until noon and it took them a few hours to unload everything. Logan shook his head at the purple couch I’d ordered as it was carried inside. The color reminded me of the suit the Joker wore in Batman. I might have been a closeted superhero nerd and the Joker was my favorite villain, but that was beside the point. The couch had been a bold choice—for me. I’d lived my whole life in bland colors and played it safe because I’d been too afraid to stand out. Look at what it had gotten me.

WITSEC had given me a new life. I couldn’t take it for granted. It was time to move forward and I was going to do that bravely and adventurously. Like Shayla. So if I wanted a purple couch, then I’d get the purple couch and the bright yellow armchair to go with it.