Page 25 of Fanboy in the Falls (Devon Falls #3)

I’m panting hard as Tom nibbles at my earlobe and then whispers against it.

“Just imagine,” he says, “if this were my cock. Filling you all the way. So very deep inside of you. I’m about to come all over my hand, little one.

Can you imagine what it would be like, having me come inside you?

Is that something you think you might want one day? ”

“Yes! Heck, yes!” The words sound strangled in my own ears, and I latch onto Colin, holding him hard, as he dips his head down again and brings our lips back together.

I fall into the rush of constant sensation: his mouth against mine, his cock and hand against mine, Tom’s fingers whirling and swirling and dipping in and out of me.

Colin nips at my lower lip with his teeth as he pulls his mouth away from mine.

“You’re so perfect, little fox,” he whispers.

I close my eyes and get lost for a moment in the haze of pure sensation running through me.

When I open them again and glance above me, I realize something: Tom’s eyes are locked on Colin’s, and Colin’s back on Tom’s, and Tom’s leaning farther over my body toward Colin, and Colin’s shifting toward him—

But then Colin moves his hand across the top of my cock, and suddenly I’m holding onto him for dear life as every single muscle in my body tightens and then releases. I come apart across Colin’s hand, over and over and over again while I clutch him against my body and Tom whispers into my ear.

“That’s it, little fox. Dammit, you’re beautiful to watch. Isn’t he beautiful to watch?”

Colin presses another kiss to my lips and pulls back. He brushes the hair off my forehead and smiles. “So damn beautiful.”

I look up between the two of them, searching. Looking to see if what I thought I saw between them before is still there.

But they’re both looking away from each other now. I collapse against the bed, just a messy mass of feeling and sensation. I don’t try to fight the sleep that comes next.

I wake up hours later, tangled between Colin and Tom. Tom’s snoring softly, one leg over my ankle, and Colin’s face is pressed into my chest. I'm not sure I’ve ever had to pee so badly in my life, but the urge to stay right here, locked between the two of them, is strong.

Sadly, my bladder eventually beats what my brain wants.

I make my way out from between them, careful not to wake either one of them.

They must have cleaned us up, but neither of them closed the curtains before they fell asleep.

It’s not like there’s a lot of need for that.

Colin’s closest neighbor is the winery, which is all the way across the lake.

I stop at the edge of the bed and stand for a minute, admiring the perfect sky outside. Clear, no clouds in sight. The stars pop light everywhere, and moonbeams are falling through the window and onto the carpet.

It’s been so long since I felt peace like this, I think as I finally make it to the bathroom.

I take care of my business, and I wonder: have I felt this way since my mother died?

This calm? This right ? And I still have no idea exactly what we’re doing here, Tom and Colin and I, or what’s going to happen with Lou the next time Dave reappears in our lives.

But I do know one thing: I don’t want to ever stop feeling like this.

I pull on shorts and a t-shirt and check on Lou, who’s sleeping soundly down the hall. I’m ready to hop back into bed and keep living every moment of this fever dream I’m in, when I notice my phone on Colin’s desk. I’ve got a new text.

I swallow hard when I see who it’s from.

Dave

I forgot to tell you. Make sure you get Lou a good Halloween costume this year. Iron Man or something. No more of that princess shit.

One feeling I don’t spend a lot of time with is anger. I don’t have much use for it. I’ve never quite understood the point of it: all it does is make you miserable when you feel it and make other people miserable. So why bother?

But right now, there’s no doubt that seeping, vicious anger is moving through my body, coming up from my toes and lacing its way through my stomach. So. Much. Anger.

This man has the best kid in the world, and he’s so wrapped up in himself that all he cares about are the clothes Lou wants to wear and the toys he wants to play with.

As if any of that should make him love his own child less or more.

And the fact that he keeps walking away from Lou so easily, without a backward glance, just like he did with me all those years ago—what kind of father does that?

Lou deserves so, so much better. And the fact that I have almost no control in this situation is sending fire through my entire soul.

For once, I don’t try to fight that anger. Not at all. I let it sit, stewing.

You can ask for things you want.

I start typing out a text.

Gabe

You don’t have to come home at all, you know. We’re fine here without you.

I want to be Lou's guardian.

I hit send and take three deep breaths. I force every single thought from my mind, the way one of my former foster mothers used to teach me to do when I meditated with her.

And then I climb back in between Tom and Colin. I carefully place Tom’s leg back over my ankle and pull Colin’s head against my chest.

Sleep comes quickly and easily.