Page 39

CHAPTER 38

CLAY

OLD TIMES SAKE

It took every ounce of self-control I’ve built over the last decade not to run after Lizzy. She said to give her space and I will, even if it’s killing me now. I’m a mess, pacing around my house, surrounded by reminders of how good things were just an hour ago.

I don’t know how to fix this. I wanted to spill my heart to her, to tell her everything, but that’s not an option. I can’t do that.

I’m desperate.

I know I’m desperate because after twenty minutes of pacing around the house and pulling my hair out, I do the last thing I want to do.

I call for help.

I’m sitting in my chair, rubbing Ani’s head when Kayleigh and Grace arrive minutes apart. I get up, following him to the door when they come inside.

I grab Kayleigh, hugging her, only breaking to look into her eyes. They’re red from crying and I remember why she probably messaged me in the first place.

“Are you alright?” I ask, rubbing her shoulders.

“I’m fine.”

“You sure? What’s wrong with Charlie?”

She glares at me and lets out a long breath through her nose. “Clay, we don’t need to talk about Charlie right now. We broke up, but deep down, I knew it was coming. ”

She reaches out and cups my jaw as Grace stands next to us. “Seriously, tell us what happened so we can help.”

I gesture to the couch and chairs in the living room.

I sit down with them and I do just that, tell them everything. Some of it they know, some of it they don’t, some of it they’re apart of.

After I pour my guts out, Kayleigh looks to Grace then back to me.

“You trust her, right?”

I swallow hard, nodding. “Of course.”

“Good, I’ll go talk to her.” Kayleigh stands and heads toward the coat rack.

I jump to my feet and stride towards her. “No, you don’t have to do that.”

She shakes her head with an amused smirk on her face.

“What did Lizzy just tell you before we showed up you big, sweet, dumb idiot?” I think back, my shoulders sagging when I realize what she’s saying. “Accept that you can’t control everything. Whether you like it or not, I’m going to talk to her. Don’t do anything stupid until you’ve heard back from me, ok?”

I nod and run my fingers through my hair.

“Fine, but you don’t have to do this though.”

She laughs and pats me on the cheek. “See? You’re still doing it.”

I groan and roll my eyes.

She looks at me, cocking an eyebrow. “Try to relax. Think about what you can actually do.” She looks over to Grace who’s watching with an amused look on her face. “I’ll see you two at the banquet tomorrow night, right?”

Grace smiles. “Well, I wasn’t invited but sure, I’d like to go.”

Kayleigh looks to me, smirking. “Take your sister as your plus one. Let me worry about Lizzy.”

“Alright, sure.”

“Good,” she says, grabbing her jacket to go .

I step in front of her, putting myself between her and the door. “You really don’t have to-”

She glares at me, stopping me mid sentence. “It’s what best friends are for.” She tilts her head towards Grace and whispers to me. “Now go enjoy a night with your sister. When was the last time just the two of you really hung out?”

I pull her in tight for a hug. “Thank you.”

“No. Thank you, Clay.” She pats me on the back before breaking our hug, heading out the door.

I watch her pull down the driveway before heading back to the living room. Slumping into my chair, I try to wrap my head around how I got here. A moment passes before Grace breaks the silence from the kitchen. She walks into the living area, with two glasses of bourbon in hand.

She takes a sip and grimaces. “Surprised there’s no open wine. I see Lizzy really made herself at home.” She smirks, handing me the other glass. “But I didn’t come over for the pity party, big brother. Of course, the first time you call me to talk in years is because of a girl. Who would have thought my big brothers were both such hopeless romantics?”

I glare at Grace. “You’re already reminding me why I don’t ask for help.”

She sits down on the floor in front of me and crosses her legs, facing the windows and staring out at the mountains. I watch her shoulders rise and fall as she takes a deep breath. “ She would have loved Lizzy.” With the soft tone of her voice, I already know who she means. I feel a lump stick in my throat, partly thinking about our mom and partly because Grace is right. She is exactly the kind of confident spirit that mom would have been instant friends with.

I watch Grace pull two hair ties from her wrist, handing them to me over her shoulder. “For old times’ sake.” Like a reflex, I take the ties from her hand, already feeling more at ease as my heart beat slows down, back to its normal rhythm.

We sit there in front of the fire for hours. I unload everything else on her. How bad my need for control has gotten. How I’ve grown to resent the person I thought was my mentor, someone I could look up to. How Lizzy makes me feel.

We even talk about how Lizzy, even when she isn’t here, has brought Grace right back to me. Sure, we’ve always seen each other around and done some family things together. But we haven’t talked like this in years.

Talking with her, I’m reminded of how easy it is to forget that she’s the youngest sibling.

As the night winds on and our bottle of whiskey is drained, I look at her, yawning by the fire, remembering all the times we’d stay up late as kids over the holidays at our grandparents’ condo in Jackson.

“Alright. You’re staying here tonight.”

She checks the time on her phone. “Sheesh. Yeah, it’s late.”

I stand up, holding out a hand to her. “Come on. You can have Lizzy’s room tonight.”

She reaches out and I tug her up off the floor. She smirks back at me with mischief in her eyes.

“Besides, this works perfectly for our plans tomorrow.”

I quirk an eyebrow at her. “What are you planning?”

She hums with childish enthusiasm, practically bouncing down the hallway past my office to the bedrooms.

She stops at the door and turns to me. “We’re going shopping for your black tie dinner.”

I look down at her, my brows scrunching together. She’s so tall it’s in stark contrast to looking down to meet Lizzy’s eyes, which I have to crane my neck to do. “I already have an outfit for that.”

She shrugs. “Maybe. But not the right one for tomorrow. ”

“What do you mean?” I grumble, already tired from the long day and not in the mood for a game, even if I’m enjoying my unexpected night with my sister.

“You’re like really slow at picking up on this. What part of let go and accept you’re not in control did you not get?” She teases, patting my cheek.

I throw my head back and groan. “I already hate this.”

She laughs and heads into the bedroom, stopping a step inside the door. “Holy shit. Lizzy really moved in.”

I look around the room over her shoulder, a warm feeling growing in my chest when I see her pink pile of pillows and the room surprisingly clean.

“Yeah, you could say that.”

She looks at the pile of pillows, shaking her head and laughing. “Did she bring all of those?”

“No, I got those for her right after she agreed to stay over.”

My sister turns and looks back at me, a wide, shit eating grin plastered on. “You definitely love her.”

Yes. Yes, I do.