Page 27

CHAPTER 26

CLAY

HOW DID I GET HERE?

“Remind me why I agreed to this?” I look at Lizzy, standing in the middle of the fancy athleisure-wear store on Main Street. I’m holding more pink stuff than I’ve ever seen in my life. How did I get here? How is this my Saturday afternoon?

She rubs her fingertip over her lip, both of which are also very pink. She hums, biting her lip. Her eyes meet mine with that look that makes me forget I’m irritated. “Because I want to get some new yoga outfits and I want to torture you.”

I drop my head and mumble an expletive to myself before looking back at her. “No, that’s why you agreed to this.” I shift the fistful of clothing I’m holding in one hand into my other one, freeing it one up to jab myself in the chest. “But this helps me how?”

She shakes her head, flicking her ponytail over her shoulder in a distracting flurry of golden blonde. “Because you’re going to go see if they have each one of these in a different size and make small talk with the girl at the counter.”

Fuck my life. What level of hell is the pink one that involves talking to strangers? “There has to be an easier way. Come on.”

She shrugs and hums. “Maybe, but I like this one.” She steps towards me, running a finger down my chest. Even with a hoodie on, the feeling sends blood rushing south. “Now be a good boy, smile, and go get my clothes for me to try on. If you do a good job, maybe I’ll send you some pics from the dressing room.”

Newly motivated to talk to a stranger, I head to the counter with my armfuls of pink. I make small talk with the girl, remembering each of the sizes Lizzy asked for, all the while looking over my shoulder, plastering on a smile and checking in with Lizzy .

She looks back at me, hovering nearby, pretending to sift through a rack of men’s clothing. Or at least I hope she’s pretending. I walk back to her, carrying the requested sports bras, cropped tanks, and leggings in the right sizes. She smiles and I point at her, noticing what’s in her hand. “No.”

She smiles and nods her head frantically. “Oh yes, please.” She bounces up and down, holding a pink athletic shirt up in front of her.

“I don’t wear pink.” I hold her clothing, pointing at the dressing room doors and smirk at her. “Now, go. I believe you have a photoshoot to get to.”

She sighs, grabbing the hangers from my hand and casts me a sidelong glance. “Too bad. You’d look great in pink.” She walks past me, running a fingernail along my jaw, sending a shiver down my spine. “But a deal’s a deal, I guess.”

I stand in the store, feeling like every other idiot wondering what to do while they wait on their girlfriend to try on clothes. Well, not girlfriend. What are we?

I’ve never felt like boyfriend material and I don’t know if that’s what she wants. I know she still has trust issues and I’ve got all my own baggage. I just know I’ve never felt like this with anyone. No one’s ever made me want to try or feel like there could be more for me.

I’m pulled from my thoughts when my phone buzzes in my pocket. I swipe to unlock my phone and feel instant heat crawl up the back of my neck.

Holy shit. There are two topless photos of Lizzy, her hand placement strategically hiding her nipples. I’m so distracted by them that I don’t even see the text message that follows at first.

Princess: Which do you like more?

I look back at the pictures, taking a good minute to realize she has on different leggings in each one.

Me: Both. Get out here. I’ll buy both, but we’re going home. NOW .

I watch as three dots appear.

Princess:

Ok, I definitely see myself wanting more of Lizzy Frank in my life - whatever that looks like, but I’m assuming it will be very pink.

Enjoying a book by the fire, I look around the house. It’s quiet except for the crackling fire. It’s been a few days since Lizzy’s improvement plan has started and I haven’t lost my mind yet. Our last lesson involved calling Tanner on speaker phone and asking “how are you doing ” and if he had anything he wanted to do together in Bend. She sat there, watching me, egging me on to keep talking.

And it felt good, even if a little forced.

Sitting here now, while she’s at happy hour with Grace, I sort of miss the chaos of her being around. But Kayleigh texted earlier and said she needed to vent, something I’m happy to let her do. She’s been there so many times for me over the years. It’s just what we do. So it works out that Lizzy is out with Grace.

An hour goes by and I finish a couple more chapters in my book. I see Ani’s ears perk up and he runs to the door, wagging his tail. I head to the door and open it, letting him out when I see Kayleigh getting out of her SUV.

He runs up to her and I laugh when I notice her cock her head and give him a curious look when she rubs his sweater. She walks up the stairs to the porch, shaking her head laughing. “Let me guess, Lizzy’s handiwork?”

My lips quirk up and I nod. “Nailed it. Have to say though, he seems pretty happy about it. ”

“He’s not the only one that seems happy.” She winks at me before closing the distance and giving me a hug.

I look down at Kayleigh. Her eyes are red, like she’s been crying. I swallow, never wanting to see anyone I care about hurting. “So it’s not going well with Charlie?”

She shakes her head. “I don’t know how much longer we can keep up the long distance thing. It just feels like we’ve drifted apart.” I watch as a tear streaks down her cheek.

I pull her in, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “You’re going to be fine, one way or another.” I hold her close, hoping my best friend knows I’m always here for her, like she’s always been for me.

The sound of Ani’s collar jingling and his paws kicking up snow catch my attention. I lift my eyes just in time to see him sprinting down the driveway. I look to where he’s heading and see Lizzy’s Bronco stopped.

Even this far away, I can see the look in her eyes. I know that look. It’s the one filled with panic and self doubt, the one she had right before she ran out of Roxy’s that night. I watch as she looks behind her and starts backing down the driveway.

“Fuck.” I let go of Kayleigh and she turns to see the Bronco drifting out of sight.

“Oh shit. I’m sorry.” I meet Kayleigh’s eyes.

“Don’t be. You did nothing wrong.” I rub her shoulders, trying to reassure her. “But I have to go. Will you be ok?”

She nods. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. Go find her.”

I run to my truck, thinking to myself about that night at the bar. I kicked myself over and over for not following Lizzy to find out why she left. I’m not going to let that happen again.

I quietly open the door to the Frank’s unit at the Aspen Grove Club. I look across the kitchen to the living area and see Lizzy, standing by the French doors to their balcony. It’s almost the same layout as the penthouse upstairs, so the view outside is nearly identical.

I slowly walk over, watching as her head tilts towards me, but not enough to see her eyes.

“How’d you know I was here?” I reach her, standing by her side. I look at her and the expression on her face is cold and icy. She keeps staring ahead, not looking back at me.

“As soon as we started working on repairs, I put temporary sensors in. If the doors open or there’s a temperature change, water hits the floor - you name it, I get a notification.” I look at her, but her gaze doesn’t waver as she looks out at the ski run in the distance. The sun is setting and the lights are just now coming on, bathing it a blueish hue. “I didn’t want to take any chances on more mistakes.”

She nods and finally looks at me. “Can you please tell me what your deal is with Kayleigh?”

I knew this was coming but I still hate that she could think this about me. But I also get her past. “I told you, Lizzy. We’re old friends, best friends. We’ve been through a lot together. I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” I feel my molars grind with how tight my jaw is. “And I told you that night in the penthouse after dinner that I don’t like being thought of as a cheating piece of shit.” My tone is harsher and voice louder than I wanted, but I can’t hide my agitation.

Her head snaps to me. “I want to trust you. But you need to give me more. ”

“I know your ex was horrible, but that’s not me. It never has been, never will be. Please can you just drop this? You’re overreacting. It’s just in your head.” I regret it the second I say it, watching as her blue eyes turn to fire. Fire that I just doused in gasoline by telling her that her feelings aren’t valid.

“I’m not overreacting, Clay. Don’t fucking tell me that, ever.” She starts to step away, but I put an arm out blocking her. “You don’t know how it feels to be constantly told that someone else knows what’s in your own head better than you do. Please, just let me go.”

“No,” I say, holding my arm steady as she pushes against it. “You’re not running away from me again. Not like at Roxy’s. Tonight, we’re going to talk this out. I’ll start: I’m sorry.”

She grunts in frustration before turning to look at me, the fire in her eyes softening to a dull glow before she rolls them. “For what?”

“I’m sorry I said you’re overreacting. I’m sorry I questioned how you feel. You’re right, only you truly know that.” I meet her gaze, wishing for some better way to put her at ease. “But I meant it. I will never be that person. It hurts when you’ve thought I could do that to someone more than once now.”

Her shoulders sag and she sighs, looking back outside for a moment. I stand firm, my arm still outstretched, watching the way the light dances in her eyes.

“I saw you two. That looked-” she frowns and her nose scrunches, “intimate. Like more than friends.”

I sigh and step towards her, noticing that she doesn’t back away from me. “I don’t know what else to say. Kayleigh and I are friends. She’s had a rough few days. That’s all.”

She turns toward me, cocking one hip out, and folding her arms across her chest. She gnaws on her lip, pulling my eyes down to them. “I’m never going to let what happened with my ex happen to me again. I don’t want to feel like you’re hiding something from me. ”

I reach out, grabbing her by the hips, holding her firmly in front of me. I look into her eyes, my heart warming when she looks right back into mine, searching for reassurance. “I’m not hiding anything. In fact, she knows all about us.”

She quirks an eyebrow at me. “She knows about us ?”

I huff a laugh. “Yeah, I told her after that first night at Roxy’s. There isn’t much we don’t share. For the record, she really likes you.”

She gnaws on her lip again, her eyes looking away before she nods. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Her eyes meet mine again.

“Yes.” I take a chance, pulling her in for a hug. She nuzzles into my chest, letting me finally exhale the breath I’ve been holding since I got here. “How’d you two get so close?”

I rub her back before turning her towards the view of the mogul course. “That’s where I tore my right knee, on that course.” She pulls away just enough to look up at me. I look away, back out towards the mountain. I hate reliving those days, but with her, it’s almost like they don’t even matter, like they’re truly in the past. “She was there. She was competing on the giant slalom course, but had time to watch. This was long after our high school dates . By then, we knew we didn’t like each other like that.”

“Romantically incompatible?” I look back down at her, holding her closely, nodding.

“Yeah, exactly. But we still had so much in common. She was going through some things at home, in her life, at the same time. After my surgery, she spent the little free time she had outside of school and training with me. She helped me with my rehab routines.” I swallow hard, not wanting to go much further. As relaxed as she makes me feel, I know there’s so much here, so much pain, things that aren’t my story to tell. “And that’s right around the time when Mom’s car accident happened. ”

Her eyes meet mine with that look, the one that makes me feel safe. The one that isn’t pity, just understanding. She rubs her cheek into my chest and I rest my chin on top of her head. “What’d you tell her about us?”

A laugh rumbles up in my chest as my stomach finally calms down, knowing that she’s not going to run off on me again. “That you drive me crazy. That you push my buttons.” I feel her try to pull out of my hug.

“Not a good start, Chapman.”

I squeeze her tight. “And that you make me feel better about myself than I have in ages. That you make me feel seen. That you’re the only person I’ve wanted to seriously date and you’re the only person in my life.”

“Clay,” she says, her voice hesitant, “I don’t know if I’m ready for something serious yet. I can’t tell you what I can give you right now, where this can go.” She turns, her sapphire eyes meeting mine with a soft smile. “But I like you, a lot. I want you to be the only person in my life too. I know that much.”

“I can live with that.” Her words feel like a weight lifted off my chest.

“No secrets, no hiding?”

“No secrets, no hiding and no more running,” I say. “Promise. Now stay still for a second.”

She looks confused, but stands there and humors me while I open my phone to the settings and security page. I hold my phone between us, letting the camera take her picture, programming her in.

Her eyes look down at the phone and then back at me, still confused.

“There. I’m not going to hide anything from you. I mean it. You want to use my phone, look at it, whatever. It’s there for you now. But I’ll tell you, it’s pretty boring except for my kindle app. ”

She looks back down at my phone and then me, now with an understanding expression. “Thank you.” She gets up on her toes to kiss me. “Now can we go back to your place?” She smirks back up at me and I feel more at ease.

“Let’s go home, princess.”