Page 63 of Dissent (The Dissenter Saga #1)

“No, Mara! I made myself look like a fool. I put my reputation on the line defending you to her,” he pointed up at the door. And I knew exactly who he was talking about. “I fucking told her to go to hell, telling her she was wrong about you.”

Oh shit! He told Belinda off? My hands went to my mouth, covering my lips in shock. “Oh my god.”

“Oh my god is right! You think what she did to you was bad? I won’t even tell you what she did to me.”

My heart ached. He went toe-to-toe with Belinda…for me. Against his mother, for me . “Oh, Jacob, I’m so sorry.”

He finally stopped pacing, his shoulders slumped, and a pained look crossed his face. “Mara,” he breathed out my name, and a sudden rush of guilt flooded me, bringing tears back to my eyes. “Why would you do this? Why would you do this to me?”

My heart broke then. I didn’t think it was possible, but it clearly was, because here I stood, with my heart breaking for the third time. And I had nothing to say. Because how do you answer that? What could I say in this moment to ease his pain?

He looked away, balling his hands into fists. “When they saw you at the plant, when they told me you had been there…I was so confused. And I lost it. I was convinced that they were mistaken. Because there was no way that Mara, my Mara, my baby sister, would betray me.”

I wiped my tears away, sucking in a breath as I held back a sob. “Jacob,” I whispered out, but he ignored me.

“And then when they told me they had caught someone. That they caught that fucking maid, Chelsea,” he ran his hands through his hair again, “I fucking lost it for reals.”

My heart squeezed, causing a searing pain to rip through my chest. The memory of Chelsea, bruised, battered, and beaten, shot through my mind. “You did that to her?” I knew Chelsea had said it was him, but I didn’t want to believe it. Jacob was good. He wouldn’t do that to anyone.

His gaze returned to mine, hardening with cold pride.

“Oh yeah I did.” My hands went back to covering my mouth, trying to keep me from screaming.

“You fucking bet I did. I knew if anyone knew where you were, it would be her. And I was going to find you.” And just as suddenly as the look of pride had flooded his face, it was gone, leaving behind only pain.

“I had to find you.” And then his shoulders slumped again as he tucked his chin in, gaze returning to the floor.

I hated what he did, but I understood. Jacob would travel through hell and back to find me, to keep me safe. He had always been there for me when no one else was. He had stood up against Belinda and, literally , took a beating for me. Because he was my brother, my older brother, and he loved me.

The realization that someone cared for me—truly loved me—filled me with so much emotion, I didn’t know what to do with it all.

And I had screwed it all up. Tears welled up in my eyes again, and I gasped as they came pouring out.

“I’m so sorry, Jacob.” I dropped my hands to my side, curling them into fists.

“I’m so sorry that I ruined everything.”

He turned to look up at me then, the anger faltering, before falling away.

He closed the gap between us and took me gently into his arms, being careful with my raw back.

“Shh…it’s okay,” he cooed. “It’s okay.” I sobbed into his chest. “We can fix this. We can figure this out, but you’ll need to cooperate. ”

Cooperate?

“When they’re done burning the camp tonight—”

I stopped listening. “Wait a minute,” I pulled away. “What do you mean ‘burning the camp tonight’? What’s happening?”

Jacob hesitated for a moment, but finally answered me. “We’ve discovered the location of the rebel base. A REG operation is scheduled for tonight.”

Oh my god. My hands flew back to my mouth, fingers curling into fists at my lips. “You guys are going to destroy the camp.”

Jacob’s eyes hardened once more, and then he nodded.

“Jacob, you can’t.”

He turned away from me. “It’s too late for that, Mara. I’m heading the operation in a few hours.”

“No! No, please,” I begged, gripping his sleeves. “ Please , you have to stop this. It’s not what it seems! Please, trust me.”

Jacob locked his gaze with mine, studying me, calculating something. “Mara, I can’t. Even if I really wanted to, I can’t stop this now.”

I let him go, covering my face with my hands. They were all going to die. They didn’t know what was coming, and there was nothing I could do. The realization sent my gut twisting itself into a knot, and my heart hammered away in its cage, anguish filling me.

It was all over.

It was one thing to resolve myself to death, but at least I knew everyone else was alive. It was a whole other thing to know that they were all going to die while I was here, knowing the fate that awaited them. I wanted to curl up, to hide in a corner and pretend none of this was happening.

But I couldn’t do that.

I had to do something.

All of their faces flashed before me. Sasha, Edith, Wes, and Chelsea. And then Matias. His brown tousled hair that fell just above his brow, and his deep brown eyes that I felt I could lose myself in forever. He may have chosen Chelsea, but I…I liked him.

Was it love? I didn’t know.

I cared for him though…deeply. I wasn’t ready to say that word—to say I loved him.

I was too afraid to claim that. Too afraid of getting hurt.

Because they burned the last boy I dared to care about in the arena.

And now, here I was, in the basement, knowing that they were going to burn down the camp.

And Matias was going to share Chase’s fate.

I couldn’t let that happen.

I had to warn them. I had to fight back. I needed to get out of here.

My mind spun, working fast, desperately trying to figure out a plan. And I could only think of one way out. I looked at Jacob, grabbing his hands, holding them up to my chest as I looked into his eyes. “Jacob, you have to help me. You have to help me escape.”