Page 52 of Dissent (The Dissenter Saga #1)

“T his Council will preside in today’s review for the United Factions of America. Representation is as follows…”

My hands were sweating, and I could feel my heart wanting to break through my chest. Edith kept telling me repeatedly that I had nothing to worry about, but this seemed like something pretty freaking big to worry about.

In Telvia, something like this meant you were in huge trouble, and reeducation was a given as far as repercussions were concerned.

It was early in the morning, but they had allowed me a quick breakfast before having to face my fate at the review. Edith escorted me to headquarters, gave me a quick wink and two thumbs up before shoving me into the tent. And now, here I was, facing what I assumed was my judge and jury.

“Gary Fisher, First in Command, representing the North. Archer McClintok, First in Command, representing the East. Sasha De’vor, President of the Free People, representing the West and South.”

Gary and Archer were nothing but holograms, glistening with a white and pale blue light.

My guess? Traveling to the southwest to take part in a trial for the Free People wasn’t their top priority.

We were all seated at the round table with the exceptions of Gary and Archer, who were depicted as standing on either side of Sasha.

Sergeant Major Giza was there too, sitting at the opposite end of me, but to my left.

Sasha cleared her throat delicately, her silvery hair braided and twisted into an elegant bun on top of her head. As she stood, the fingers of both her hands rested on the table as though to steady her.

“Miss Mara de la Puente, First Daughter of Telvia and child of the usurper, you stand here in review for your conduct three days prior. You were ordered to remain on the premises of the rebellion camp, but broke command and joined your comrades on a reconnaissance mission to an unknown Telvian processing facility. How do you plead?”

Little beads of sweat took shape on my brow. My lip quivered—only a moment—before I declared. “Guilty.”

“Then you accept full responsibility for your actions?”

I desperately tried to retain control of my breath as I nodded.

I was scared, no doubt about it. I didn’t know what was going to come of this, but the least I could do was accept whatever they threw at me as bravely as I could.

Chelsea took a hit for me. Wes was still recovering in the camp hospital.

The least I could do was be a big girl about this and take my lickings.

I just hoped whatever they did to me didn’t hurt too bad.

“Please speak your responses.”

I blinked, looking at the hologram that spoke to me. “I…I’m guilty, sir. I disobeyed a direct order, and I asked Chelsea to help me sneak onto the mission.”

They remained quiet for only a moment before Giza piped up. “Council, I would be interested in knowing why Miss de la Puente disobeyed orders.” Sasha looked at him before giving one slow nod. He turned to face me with kind, empathic eyes. “Miss de la Puente, why did you go on the mission?”

I stayed silent for a moment, weighing out my response.

I wanted to be honest, but I also wasn’t sure if these people would understand my motivations for going.

All I could do in the end was share where my head was at.

Looking up, I rolled my shoulders back, trying my best to stand tall as I shared the inner workings of my mind.

“I don’t know if you’ll get why I went, but…

but I went because I had to know.” I paused for a few seconds, trying to gather my thoughts before continuing.

“I’ve grown up my whole life in Telvia. I only know the story Raúl and the Telvian Council feed to the people.

But since being here, my world has turned upside down.

I’m learning that you all aren’t what he says you are.

I mean, I didn’t even know there was a faction to the North and East. As far as us Telvians know, there’s nothing beyond our walls—just desert.

Desert and the remnants of what was the rest of the United States when it all fell during the Great Drought.

“Raúl tells us there’s not enough for everyone…

that we’ve got to protect what’s ours.” I listened to myself trying to explain a lifetime of lies that, now as I said them out loud, I could see never made sense to begin with.

But that was the problem, wasn’t it? That was the problem with Telvia.

The reasons and logic were all half-baked, but you couldn’t say that.

You couldn’t say that it didn’t make sense. You couldn’t ask why.

Why wasn’t there enough?

Why does everyone have to be divided?

Why were we all us versus them ?

Why did it have to be this way?

Why couldn’t we try something different?

Why?

There were no whys . Because answering why meant admitting that the narrative you needed to keep everyone in check, to keep everyone in the dark, was wrong.

Keeping people in the dark meant keeping control.

And that’s what it was all about in the end—control.

My dad got a taste of power and decided he liked it too much to let it go.

It was all slipping into place—the puzzle pieces falling in, creating a picture I wasn’t too sure I wanted to look at. But I had to. Because eventually, we all need to grow up.

I grimaced at the thought. My hand drew to my chest and wrapped around my little heart.

I pressed on. “I’m learning that my dad is wrong.

That Raúl’s way of running the country is wrong, and that things need to change.

But you have to understand that Raúl is still my dad.

And I…I guess I just thought that if I went on the mission, I would see something that would help me finally give up whatever hope I’ve been hanging on to.

” I looked at each one of them, but they gave away nothing.

Each expression shared nothing but stoic, pensive thoughts.

Anxiety was a snake coiled too tight inside me as I watched their scrutinizing gazes.

The silence was finally broken, this time by Sasha.

“I understand your need for proof, child, and I understand the difficult position you are in. To have to choose between your family and a rebellion you’ve been groomed to see as the enemy is not a simple place to be in.

That does not , however, excuse your actions. ”

I nodded. She was right, and I wasn’t going to try to get out of whatever punishment I was going to be assigned. I deserved it. I was going to take whatever it was, and I was going to do my best to like it…for Chelsea. “I understand. And I accept full responsibility for my actions.”

Sasha nodded. “Good. The Council will deliberate on the consequences of your choices.”

“President De’vor,” one hologram spoke. I thought it might be the Eastern guy, but I really couldn’t tell who was who. “Miss de la Puente broke command with the aid of several others. This should also be addressed—”

I spoke without thinking, my heart skipping a beat.

“It’s not their fault. It’s mine.” My voice came out firm as I cut through.

“It’s all my fault. Wes and Matias didn’t know.

By the time they figured out I was there, we were already so close to the processing facility that it didn’t make sense to turn me away.

And it’s not Chelsea’s fault either. I begged her to let me go, and in the end, I bribed her.

I told her I would do the propaganda footage if she helped me.

She knew how important it was to you all.

She was only trying to do what she thought was best for the Dissenters in the end.

Please, don’t punish them because of me. It’s my fault…just me.”

Everyone stared back at me—a multitude of expressions and emotions fluttering through.

Confusion, surprise, annoyance, and interest all had their turn on display, but no one said anything.

My heart quickened in the silence. Fear began circling in my core.

But there was one thing I didn’t feel this time…

Regret.

Don’t get me wrong. There was plenty I regretted in my life, but not at this moment.

For once, I accepted my blame, my shame, my guilt, like I should.

And it felt good…a little scary, but good.

Now I was going to ride that shame pony home, and if it meant being exiled or executed or hung by my toenails in a tree or whatever the hell it was they did around here, I was going to wear a smile and deal with it.

I was going to take on whatever came my way.

I had put my big girl pants on, and it was damn well about time.

The council remained quiet, looking at one another in silent conversation.

It was Sasha who finally spoke after what felt like a century.

“I hope it does not surprise you that this council is extremely displeased with your actions. But…I am also pleased with your willingness to be truthful and accept full responsibility for what transpired.” She quieted, making a soft clucking sound as she stared me down.

“It seems you are slowly learning a different way of seeing the world, a different philosophy for life. But I fear you’re not quite understanding the importance of what’s best for the masses.

You placed your need for answers and proof above what is best for the greater good. It was selfish.

“When Miss McKenna agreed to take you, she knew we would punish her for breaking command. I do not doubt that. But she knew that you agreeing to do the propaganda footage was better for the greater good. As such, she agreed to help you. When she took the bullet for you, it was once again for what was best for all versus what was best for her. When Mr. Alvarez drove in circles to ensure you weren’t followed, it was what was best for all and not just one person. ”

The image of Wes bleeding under my hands invaded my consciousness, sending a chill up my spine. I shook my head, trying to get the image out of my mind.

“You see, child,” she continued, “unlike your father, the Dissenters seek to live by a different philosophy. We seek to establish a world based on justice and what is best for all versus what is best for a few. Your peers’ actions that night demonstrated that philosophy, living it to their core.

You, on the other hand, demonstrated that your needs were more important than their safety. And that cannot go unpunished.”

I looked at the floor, my cheeks reddening with shame. What was I going to say to her? That she was wrong? I didn’t have a defense. She was right—100 percent right. I screwed up. I chose myself over everyone else, and now someone else was paying the price for my actions.

“That being said,” the timbre of her voice was steady and slow, “your willingness to accept full responsibility for your actions and to assume fault for the role your peers played shows your ability to place others before yourself. And that, child, shows me your growth.”

I looked up at her, surprised. Warmth swirled in my belly as my anxiety seemed to ease, but I didn’t dare say a word.

I didn’t know what to expect. It wasn’t like my parents ever recognized anything I did as good .

To hear someone I barely knew acknowledging something positive about me was refreshing and, well, kind of weird.

Uncomfortable.

I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to take it, but one thing was certain—the Dissenters were nothing like Raúl. I didn’t know what was going to happen next, but one thing was certain...

I was ready.