Page 15

Harlow

Friday Morning

Solitary

T he drugs in my system were wearing off, but I couldn’t tell if Monty was here or if it was someone or something else that was lurking in the corner of the room.

My head was pounding, and my body ached from the hard mattress on the rickety bed.

I pulled myself up to sitting with a groan. There was nothing else to look at but padded walls and the creature waiting for me to make my move.

“Who are you?” I asked. When I got no response and didn’t feel Monty’s presence, I chalked it up to yet another hallucination.

In the hours or days I spent under whatever sedative Vane and his orderlies shot into my veins, my meds had worn off completely.

The hallucinations were creeping back in. So was my heat. My body was craving my mates and sweat lined my skin.

I needed them as much as I needed to be myself again. The room was wrong, devoid of any comfort, and their scents were absent.

A pitiful whimper escaped me as I curled into a ball. This was the worst form of torture.

The door opened and a nurse came in. Her scrubs were ragged, and her hair was frizzy to the point it almost looked as if she stuck her finger in a socket. She was wearing a medical mask, and her eyes were cold and overlined in eyeliner, making her seem half-crazed.

She froze when she saw I was up. “I’ll get Vane.” That was all she said before stepping out and leaving me alone again.

My stomach was empty to the point of nausea, and I had no real idea what day it was.

Or if a day had even passed.

Vane waltzed in a few minutes later with a triumphant smirk on his face. He pointed to a sigil on my doorframe and chuckled before closing the door.

“Do you know what that means?” he asked as he leaned against the wall. I’d never wanted to smack a smug look off anyone more. He really thought he was winning, and the fact he got me here and Monty wasn’t fighting, meant he was either an idiot and Monty would kill him, or something had changed.

“No,” I finally answered when he refused to continue until I did.

“It means your little protectors can’t get to you in here,” he said with a dark laugh. “But my other demons can. I hope you enjoy your time here in solitary. By the time Ivar finds you, there will be little left.”

The way he said ‘my demons’ like he had control over them was telling of his narcissism. I’d met their commander and their queen, the lower demons weren’t the ones with the power.

“Who is Ivar?” I demanded. What the hell was Vane’s problem?! “And what the fuck do you mean the other demons can?”

“Oh, you’ll be their favorite meal,” he said. “And no meds to hold them back so you’ll be extra tasty. You think your heat will drive those supposed mates of yours wild? Just wait until they scent you.”

He was obviously ignoring part of my question. Typical.

Then his words hit me and my empty stomach churned. I’d spent heats in clinics, suffering, but this would be a brand of torture I didn’t want to endure.

“You’re a sick fuck, they’ll come for me,” I growled as I frantically searched my brain for anything I could use against him.

He knew more about that world than I did. From the way Drake talked, Vane was merely human. Why did the demons listen to him? And who the fuck was Ivar? Hel didn’t mention him... wait, that might work.

“Or Hel will. She was with me on that roof.”

He froze at that and swallowed hard.

Guess I found his weak spot.

Checkmate, asshole.

Whatever his plans were, they didn’t involve her at all. A revolution in some capacity. One I’d warn her about.

“I was promised protection, even from her,” he argued. “Not everyone is happy with the way things are run.”

“They owe you nothing, you don’t think you’re just a fucking tool?” I growled. “They’re demons, Vane. Not exactly trustworthy.”

“Deals are unbreakable,” he said. “And I have more than one in place.”

He was smug, sure of himself, and that wasn’t good.

“Why are you being so forthcoming?” I accused. “You’re spewing out your secrets like I won’t spread them around.”

The smile that spread across his face was cold enough to send a shiver through me. I wasn’t going to like whatever he said next. I just hoped there was a piece of me left when Monty found me.

“Because when we’re done with you, there won’t be anything left to find. Goodbye, Harlow.”

The first demons came to my room while I slept. I woke up to my arms and legs bound, unable to fight back as one sat on my stomach and two more leaned over the sides of the bed.

“Get off of me!” I yelled as I thrashed against the bindings, but it was useless. The thick leather straps were secured to the bedposts, and I was unable to stop them.

True fear struck through me, knowing that I couldn’t escape or fight them, that they could do anything to me.

The demons all let out a hiss and took deep breaths, breathing in my fear with terrifying excitement. Their tongues darted out, tasting the air as their eyes rolled back. Even though the fear drowned it out, my heat had hit, fever clinging to me and a deep ache that was visceral. They were drowning in the heightened emotions.

They feed from it. Stop freaking out, Harlow.

Even with my internal warnings it was hard to shut it off. Everything in me wanted to pull away, to run as far as I could. But I was helpless.

“I knew you were a demon! The spawn of Satan from the moment you were brought into this world!” My grandmother’s screeching voice drowned out the slurping and hissing from the feral demons feeding from me. This time she was here, frantically waving her thin arms at me as she watched the creatures devour my emotions like their last meal.

As long as they didn’t devour me, I could make it through this. I would.

“Let me go! She’s not here, she’s not real!” I shouted until my throat was hoarse.

“She is. Your grandmother knew of our kind, knew what you were capable of,” the demon on my chest corrected me. “Too bad exorcisms don’t actually work!”

All three cackled at his words, and despite knowing it couldn’t possibly be true, that seed of doubt was planted.

Hel did say I was chosen by her... it could be true.

Each flicker of doubt, worry, and defeat fed them until there was no energy left to think or fight them.

As I drifted out, I weakly called for Monty, Drake, Roman, and Hiro. Anyone that would listen.

But no one came.

Days had passed in solitary. My days and nights were filled with a trail of demons, one after the other, pushing me to my limits.

Even in my sleep I couldn’t escape them as they created nightmares that would haunt me for years to come.

All I knew was fear, pain, need, lust, heat, and desolation.

Once again, my body didn’t feel like my own, it was being used to feed an army of demons and, somehow, their commander once again couldn’t save me.

Or wouldn’t.

Even though I knew from the sigil Vane showed me on my door that he couldn’t find me, it was hard to shake the awful feeling of abandonment.

One man, even one who dealt with demons, shouldn’t have the power he did.

Vane hadn’t shown his face, but I was never truly alone. I had crippling depression and hallucinations that were nonstop to keep me company.

My whole body ached, and I barely moved from my bed.

The food they brought once a day was untouched so far, and I wasn’t even hungry, the heat made sure of that.

I felt empty. Hollow. Like they’d taken pieces of me I couldn’t get back.

My eyes drifted to the corner and locked onto my current stalker. The shadowy figure took up the entire space from floor to ceiling.

I couldn’t make out much except clawed hands that poked out from under his robes, even his face wasn’t visible.

Yet I could feel him watching me, waiting for something.

He’d get nothing from me. I felt like a shell of a person, my emotions officially as tapped out as my body. My heat was waning and he was left with the final dregs of it, nothing in comparison to what they’d feasted on so far.

It felt as if I were watching myself from the outside, not able to control my body at all. The rare moments I tried to shift or move, my limbs felt heavy like they were filled with lead.

He couldn’t keep me here forever, right?

Hiro and Drake stood across the room, screaming down at me. Hiro’s soft features were gone, and his beautiful face was contorted in rage as he threw every barb he had at me.

“You’re useless, you can’t even move right now. You know we never actually liked you, right?”

The cruel laugh that fell from his lips was wrong. Hiro wouldn’t laugh at me like that, would he?

“I only fucked you because it was an easy fuck,” Drake added in. “What a lousy lay, too. I’m used to much prettier and curvier women. I had to picture someone else just so I could get it up.”

My heart broke then, each line my mates threw at me only shattered it further until I knew I’d never be the same.

“You were my only friends,” I said in a barely audible voice. The lack of food was really starting to hit me now. My head barely lifted before I had to rest against my mattress again.

“We were never your friends,” Drake corrected. “We used you. That’s all you’re good for anyway. To be used and cast aside like the trash you are.”

Tears coursed down my cheeks. I didn’t bother to wipe them away. They were right. I’d always been thrown aside like trash.

Why would Dark Haven be any different?

I was put here by Vane, tossed aside by them.

All I could do was curl into a ball as they continued to throw insults at me for what felt like hours.

Occasionally Layne, Crew, and Roman would pop in to pour salt on the wound, but it was Hiro and Drake that kept momentum going.

The nurse popped in occasionally, acting like she couldn’t see any of the creatures or people here with me. She sounded distorted like she was speaking to me through a bubble, and I never responded since I wasn’t exactly sure what she’d even said to me. I just clutched at my thin nightgown and curled in on myself.

This time she took the tray and left, not bothering to care that Drake had now perched on my bed, ready to strike.

The moment the door closed, he leaned in so his lips brushed my ear. I curled in further on myself, revolted by his touch, not turned on like I was before.

“You’re useless, Harlow. That’s all you’ll ever be. A burden to those in your life and a failure to society. If you died here, you’d be forgotten, never having amounted to anything in life. Your grandmother would be proven right. You’re an abomination.”

Every single fear or self-deprecating thought I’d had was tossed out into the open. My mind had always been a toxic place but it was contained. Having them said out loud like this was the worst possible torture that anyone could attempt on me.

Even worse, the words were coming from the two people I genuinely thought cared about me in some capacity.

“We never wanted you, Harlow,” Roman said as he crouched down in front of the bed to look into my eyes.

His face blurred behind my tears and a sob broke out as his features twisted in disgust, like even the sight of me was pathetic.

I was pathetic.

I was a reject, a girl with no friends or family, no purpose in life, and not a single thing to be remembered for. I’d fade away like a leaf in the wind, never to be seen again.

No one would care enough to miss me.

My body felt heavier, and I let my eyes slip closed. Unable to face them any longer as depression constrained me, crushing me under its pressure.

Vane chose that moment to walk in. He looked downright gleeful as he closed the door behind him and dragged me ruthlessly into a sitting position. When he tried to let go, I fell back on my mattress with no will to support myself.

He growled and left me there but there was also a look of satisfaction in his face. He told me he’d break me, and he did. Though he could hardly take credit for the horrors my own mind inflicted on me.

“I thought I’d come and let you know that your protector won’t be an issue. My contacts overheard Ivar talking to Hel, and it seems I’m in the clear. She knows I have you and doesn’t care,” he said. The triumphant, condescending tone was like nails on a chalkboard. “Oh, I’m sorry, you know him as Monty, don’t you?”

Monty.

Ivar.

A few pieces fell into place in my foggy brain, but I couldn’t get much further before another wave of bone-deep exhaustion hit me and I gave up.

“That means you won’t be leaving this bed or this room anytime soon. If ever.”

I’d die in this room. At the moment, I couldn’t find it in me to care.

Death would be merciful.