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CHAPTER FOURTEEN

ALANNA

“We need to talk.” I twist to look up as Cy steps into the room.

I’d come in here for a reason I don’t know. Charlotte was playing with Delilah. I could’ve stayed with Rebel and everyone else, but I’d needed silence. I didn’t want to talk. Not that I didn’t want to talk to them, I didn’t want the questions I’m sure they have wanted to ask.

I probably should’ve just done something else entirely. Instead, I came in here, taken a shower, and just finished getting dressed when the door opened.

I focus on Cy and the way his jaw seems to tick. “What do we need to talk about?”

There’s plenty we need to talk about. Like what happened earlier and what he said afterward. How he claimed we were going to do more of that later, and my daughter was going to be sleeping in another room away from me while I was in bed with him. I can’t do that.

Still, all I can think about is how I’d had an orgasm from just grinding myself against his thigh. Never has that happened to me. Not that I’ve done anything like it before. The only other experience I have besides what I’ve done for myself is with my . . . nope, I’m not going to go there and think about it. In the past four years, I’ve done everything I can think of to overcome what he did to me. I even joined an online abuse support group. It was all anonymous. No one knew who each other was, or even each other’s names. It was a place where we could all let out what we endured and talk about how it’s making us feel.

Cy crosses the room, stops directly next to his bed, looks down at me, and finally takes a seat on the side. He cocks a leg, shifts so he’s facing me, then lowers himself ‘til he’s leaning to his side, bracing himself on an elbow. Not once taking his gaze away from mine.

“I started looking into your past,” he announces, tone flat and emotionless.

I can’t get a read on what he’s thinking with what he’s just informed me of. My heart clenches and I feel my throat starting to tighten.

“Let me rephrase. I started looking into your parents. Your mother is a character.”

“She’s a control freak,” I blurt.

“Yeah, I’m getting that. She tried to keep your brothers from joining the military. Demands their attention when they’re in the States. From what I’ve found on that situation, it’s the reason they’re constantly out on missions as much as possible.”

I can understand that. They wanted to join the military when they were eighteen, but they waited because of me. I tried to tell them they could, they didn’t listen to me, though. At the time, I’d been grateful, felt guilty, but still, grateful. Our mother wanted them to go to college, which they did while staying at home. They didn’t even get to choose the college they picked or the classes they took. She had their lives planned just as she’d had mine.

Our mom, controlling as she was, was never home, so she never knew that her plans for me were never going to work. My dad was seeing to that in the darkness of night.

“And . . .” I draw out.

“Found some shit I didn’t want to find,” he mutters.

I tense, straighten my shoulders, and hold his gaze. This is hard for me. I don’t know what he found he didn’t want to, it could be several different things, I’m just not sure what. My dad enjoyed tormenting me in several different ways.

“Saw the pictures, baby.”

At the mention of pictures, my eyes drop from his, and I look at anything else but him.

“And the videos.”

Tears burn my eyes.

Out of everything he could have mentioned, those were the things I didn’t want him to find.

“Alanna, look at me,” he orders, keeping his voice soft.

I shake my head and release a shuddered breath. “What else did you find?”

“I stopped at that,” he answers, his fingers gripping my chin, forcing me to look at him. “Didn’t want to go further without us talking more first.”

I do my best to nod, but his fingers keep me from doing so. “Why?”

Cy lets my chin go and shifts to sit up. “After the accident yesterday, you were out cold. I needed to buy us time for my brothers to get to us. I’d already alerted them. I heard the two men talking. One of them mentioned something that didn’t sit right with me, claimed your father wasn’t your father.”I open my mouth to protest, but Cy keeps going. “That man, it doesn’t matter if he’s your biological father or not, he never should have put his hands on you.”

Tears that were already burning my eyes slide down my cheeks. There’s no stopping them, no holding them back.

“If he’s not my dad, then who is? Is my mother even my mother?”

“I don’t know, Short Stuff, but we’ll find out. I swear to you, we’ll find out the answers.”

I nod, heaving in a heavy breath that feels more weighted than ever.

“We’ve got several things, though, baby, we gotta get straight.” He sighs while swiping the tears from my cheek.

“What?” I feel my lips tremble at the question.

What else is there to talk about?

“I know about your will that you had Rebel draw up. I know you made her Charlotte’s guardian if something happens to you. You?—”

“You aren’t supposed to know —”

“If you’d let me finish, Alanna,” he says, Impatient that I interrupted him and then him doing the same to me.

“But you shouldn’t know about that,” I tell him, drawing away from him and wrapping my arms around my legs.

“Alanna, there’s no keeping shit from me anymore.” There’s a determination in his eyes that I’d not seen before. “I told you I started digging into your past. But it was Rogue who told me. He also told me Rebel knows the truth about Charlotte.”

Of course, Rogue would go to him. I can’t even blame Rebel for Rogue finding out. I’m just surprised it took this long for him to say something. Deep down, I knew he’d known since I told her.

“Now, what you need to know is that nothing is going to happen to you. You aren’t going to run off, leaving your daughter behind. You’re not fuckin’ leaving in order to keep them from getting her. I’m gonna make sure you both stay safe. For two damn years, I’ve seen that girl as mine. Claimed you both, had to wait, give you time, but you both are mine,” he states, leaning forward. “I’ll also tell you this, Alanna, and you best listen good. They might be who you picked for guardians, they’re a good pick, but if something God forbid happens to you, it’ll be me who raises her. Only if something happens to the both of us will she go to anyone else. Got me?”

All I can do is nod, my mind still processing what all he just shared. He claimed me? Claimed Charlotte?He doesn’t even know either of us all that well. I mean, sure, he’s been there for Charlotte. She adores him and would want nothing more than to have him as her daddy. She’s even asked me this before.

“Another thing we need to talk about.”

Blinking, I can’t help but blurt, “You claimed me? Why?”

“Baby, what’s between us, it’s been growing since the first day I saw you. Knew it then you were gonna be mine. I was bidding my time. You just refused to open your eyes to see what we’ve had growing since day one.”

“But you don’t know me.” He didn’t, not really.

“I know you’re a great mom. That you work hard. You stopped going to school after you started working for Rebel. I also know that you haven’t been with a man in the time you’ve been working for my cousin. I’m pretty sure you haven’t been with anyone since you had Charlotte. I also know that you kiss better than I’ve ever dreamed of you kissing me. And the sight of you coming is a vision I won’t soon forget. The only thing that will be better is when I finally get inside you.”

Oh. My. God.

“We’re gonna have time to make things work, get to know each other better. Charlotte is gonna get to know me, granted she doesn’t have to because she already knows me. I’ve always been real with the kid. She knows where she stands with me. Lotte might be four, but she ain’t stupid. She wants you and me together, otherwise she wouldn’t have asked me to help her get you a birthday present. That being your very own knight.”

Oh God.

Kill me now. My daughter would ask him something like that.

“Just so we’re clear, I ain’t no knight, but I’m yours all the same. We clear on that?”

Um, no, we’re definitely not clear on this, but I don’t say this. Instead, I swallow down the words and nod.

“Good. Now that we’ve cleared that up, we’ve got something else to discuss.”

“What?” I whisper, trying to keep my breathing even so he doesn’t hear me freaking out internally.

“Your brothers email you, but they’re encrypted. You taught Rebel how to read them if she ever had to, why?”

Jeez, someone’s really been talking.

Sighing, I start fidgeting. “Davis and Willis. They know where I am.” It’s the first time I’ve admitted this. “We don’t communicate any other way. They’ve never met Charlotte. They send updates about themselves every so often and ask me to update them on Charlotte and me. Our messages are encrypted because they’re protecting us the best they can right now. Davis has said plenty of times he and Willis don’t have anything to do with our parents. Haven’t since they enlisted, from what they’ve told me. She still tries to control them, and they don’t want her finding out where I am.”

Cy nods and reaches for my hands. “If she finds you, there’s nothing she can do. Charlotte is your daughter and mine. It’s time you come out of the shadows, stop hiding, and live. Someone already knows where you are anyway. What you gotta get though, baby, is they ain’t getting either of you. Not without bloodshed.”

“That’s what I didn’t want to happen.” I don’t mean for the words to slip, but they do.

“Alanna, the only blood that will be spilled is theirs. Okay?”

He gives my hands a squeeze. He’s focused, waiting.

“Okay,” I finally agree.

“Good.” A grin tugs at his lips, and he moves, coming at me. I fall backward with him coming over me. “Now, it’s time to take care of something else entirely.” With that, he kisses me. Deeply. Heatedly.

It’s a kiss unlike all the others, and it makes my insides all warm and fuzzy. More importantly, I feel the cracks that already started in the shield I’ve kept in place crack all the more.