Page 42 of Cowboy’s Last Stand (His to Protect #1)

The penetration was easier this time. Her slick sheath slid down on him, inch by inch.

He gritted his teeth and the tight, wet feel of her.

Not to mention the sight of her pretty sex surrounding him.

He filled his hands with the plump curves of her bottom while she adjusted to his size and length.

Her expression was half torture, half ecstasy.

God. He was going to come before she even moved.

Somehow, he didn’t. The condom helped, and so did the leisurely pace she set. He focused on her stiff nipples, still framed by that barely there bra. He pinched the tips, using a firmer touch than before.

She gasped and shuddered, seeming near orgasm again. Already.

Jason didn’t know how Wade had failed to get her off because she was incredibly responsive. They had excellent chemistry, and he was no slouch in the bedroom, but she was just so easy . He loved it.

“Touch yourself,” he rasped.

After a short hesitation, she reached behind her back to unhook the bra.

It fell away. She cupped her breasts delicately, toying with the nipples.

His nostrils flared with arousal. He moved his gaze from her perfect tits to her steamy sex, murmuring encouragement.

Licking his thumb, he placed it over her clitoris.

He rubbed her in a circular motion, watching her face.

When he stopped, she took over. She stroked her swollen nub while he gripped her hips, sliding her up and down on top of him.

She screamed his name, bouncing and jerking as she came.

That was when he lost it. Unable to wait another second, he flipped her onto her back and plunged into her.

He pounded her into the mattress, taking what he wanted, wringing every drop of passion from her.

With a final thrust and a hoarse cry, he spent himself inside her.

He didn’t know how long they stayed like that, bodies joined and hearts racing.

He finally disentangled himself from her and went to dispose of the condom.

When he returned, she was still in the same position, her eyes closed.

She’d tugged the sheet over half of her body, leaving one breast and one hip exposed.

Jason wanted nothing more than to climb on top of her again. He could start from scratch, kissing every lovely inch of her. He’d focused on the front parts, but there was plenty more to explore. The nape of her neck, her lush backside…

He tore his gaze away and tugged on his jeans instead.

She might not appreciate another round so quickly.

It was better to give her space, considering how she’d reacted the last time they’d been intimate.

He bent to stoke the fire, content to wait.

After he added another log and had the fire crackling, he noticed her watching him.

She was lying on her side with her arm bent, her head resting on one hand.

She’d pulled the sheet up over both breasts, so now only her shoulders were bare.

He gauged her expression warily. She didn’t appear regretful.

Her gaze traveled over his shirtless torso and hastily buttoned jeans.

He set the poker aside and joined her on the mattress.

There wasn’t enough room to keep his distance, but he didn’t try to remove the sheet.

He stretched out alongside her and tried to memorize every detail of her face.

She was achingly lovely in the firelight.

She gave him a catlike smile. “You’re very attractive.”

He arched a brow. “Am I?”

“Are you going to pretend you don’t know?”

He shrugged because women had called him handsome before, in another lifetime. His near-death experience and prolonged recovery had changed him so much he almost didn’t recognize himself. “I guess neither of us got hit with the ugly stick.”

“We got hit by other things,” she agreed.

He didn’t know what to say next. Some topics were off-limits. They couldn’t discuss her past, or their future, or his unrequited love for her. It left him floundering for words and wondering when he could touch her again.

Maybe she could read the desire on his face or the uncertainty.

Either way, she sat forward on the mattress, clutching the sheet to her breasts.

He stared at the smooth line of her back and the graceful curve of her buttocks.

She was so gorgeously made, inside and out. His chest ached with love for her.

He straightened to kiss her shoulder blade. The first lines of a poem came to him as if in a dream, so he murmured them to her.

“She walks in beauty, like the night, of cloudless climes and starry skies.”

Natalie turned to him in surprise. “And all that’s best of dark and bright…”

“Meet in her aspect and her eyes,” he finished.

Too late, he realized his mistake. Maybe it was self-sabotage, something his subconscious had cooked up because he hadn’t been able to start this conversation.

Whatever had prompted the move, it was devastating and irreversible.

She knew those lines by heart, and not just because she was a well-read, articulate, sexy librarian type.

She knew the poem because Mike had quoted it.

She scrambled to her feet and stared at him in horror. “You read my letters.”

It wasn’t the correct conclusion, but it was close. She’d realize the truth at some point, with or without his help.

“You went into my closet and searched through my personal belongings?” she asked. “You read the letters my husband wrote me? How could you do that?”

He held up his palms as if he was innocent. “I didn’t.”

She shook her head in disbelief.

“I didn’t read your letters. Not the way you mean.”

She started tugging on her clothes in jerky motions, her eyes wide with shock. “I don’t understand.”

“I worked with Mike,” Jason said, biting the bullet. “In Kabul.”

Her face went slack.

“He saved my life. The story I told you was about him.”

Tears filled her eyes as the words sank in. “Mike… saved your life.”

Jason found his shirt and put it on. He watched her struggle with her own blouse, his stomach roiling.

She seemed to have lost the ability to do buttons.

Her shaking fingers wouldn’t work. He didn’t offer his assistance.

The only touch they were going to exchange now was a slap, given by her to him.

“All this time,” she whispered. “You’ve been lying to me.”

His jaw tightened as agony ripped through him.

“Why?”

“I haven’t lied. Not directly.”

“I knew you were too good to be true,” she said, holding her blouse closed. “I knew there was something wrong with you.”

He massaged the nape of his neck. She had every right to feel deceived and betrayed.

“I knew I couldn’t trust you,” she said. “I knew you were hiding something.”

He put his hands on his hips and hung his head. There was no way to convince her that he hadn’t meant to deceive her. He hadn’t meant to trick her or manipulate her. He’d just failed to tell her the complete story. It was the worst mistake of his life, next to underestimating the danger in Kabul.

“I tried to tell you,” he said huskily.

“You tried?”

“I did tell you,” he said, going on the defensive. “I couldn’t tell you everything at once because it was too painful for the both of us. But I told you what I could, when I could. I told you about the accident.”

“You didn’t tell me it was Mike who died beside you!” she cried.

“I told you every detail except his name. Your husband died in an explosion, Natalie. He worked in the EOD. Military casualties aren’t that common, even in the most dangerous jobs. Deep down, you knew it wasn’t a coincidence. You knew.”

Her lips thinned with fury. “How dare you?”

He sank to the sofa and buried his hands in his hair. He’d never felt lower. “I’m sorry.”

“You were right about one thing. It should have been you.”

Jason didn’t argue because he agreed on this point. It should have been him.

“Get out,” she said. “I never want to see you again.”

He nodded his understanding. “I’ll pack my things.”

Tears filled her eyes again, but she didn’t back down. He was getting exactly what he deserved: her utter contempt. Her face crumpled as she gathered up her discarded lingerie. Then she left him sitting there, wishing he were dead.