Page 41 of Cowboy’s Last Stand (His to Protect #1)
J ason grabbed his backpack from the garage on his way upstairs.
He set the pack on the unfinished kitchen countertop and began shoving items into it at random. When he realized that he couldn’t make everything fit, especially the new clothes, he dumped it out and started over.
He’d told her that he loved her in no uncertain terms, and she’d stared at him like a deer in headlights.
She didn’t share his feelings. She was too hung up on Mike, too devastated by loss.
He’d been overconfident about his chances with her.
He’d assumed she wanted more than a meaningless fling. He’d been wrong.
There was no reason to tell her about his connection to Mike now. It would only hurt them both. He would leave Texas the same way he’d come in, on foot. He’d head to the outskirts of town and head west toward San Diego. Maybe if he walked all the way there, he’d feel better by the time he arrived.
Jason doubted it, but it was worth a try.
Natalie appeared in the doorway, to his surprise.
She knocked on the open door as if it wasn’t her own goddamned house.
She was still wearing her librarian outfit, pinstriped pants, and a prim blouse.
Her hair was in loose curls, framing her beautiful face.
The sight of her made his heart twist in his chest.
“What are you doing?” she asked, venturing inside.
He heard the clink of the brass knuckles at the bottom of his pack. He was going to throw the weapon into the nearest river. “I’m leaving.”
“Why?”
Jason tossed socks into his backpack with more force than necessary. “You said you needed to be alone.”
She moved closer to him, covering his hands with hers.
Jason felt a muscle in his jaw tick. He was too agitated for stillness, his nerves as taut as a bowstring.
He closed his eyes and counted to ten. It was a strategy his therapist had recommended for regaining control.
When he was finished, he studied her warily.
“I didn’t mean it,” she said. “I want you to stay.”
“Tonight?”
“More than tonight.”
His brow furrowed in confusion.
She turned his hand over and traced the calluses on his palm. “It’s not easy for me to let go of the past. When Mike died, it almost killed me. I can’t bear to lose someone again. Is that so hard to understand?”
“No,” he admitted.
“I’m afraid of moving too fast, emotionally.”
He concentrated on the gentle sweep of her fingertips. Memories from the other night swarmed his senses, crowding out the hurt from her rejection. His pulse leaped with excitement as she stroked his hand.
She nibbled her lower lip. “Can we focus on the physical side of things for now?”
His gaze rose from her mouth to her eyes. “Let me get this straight. You don’t want me to tell you how I feel. You just want me to fuck you.”
She didn’t flinch at his crude words. “Is that a problem?”
It was a problem, but damned if he was going to turn her down.
Not when she was offering him her body and begging him to stay.
“I’ll do whatever you like, but are you sure about this?
Because at first, you said you weren’t ready to date.
Then you said you wanted a steady guy. Now you’re asking for sex only. ”
“I’m not asking for sex only ,” she said. “I’m asking you to go slow. There are topics I’m not willing to discuss yet and feelings I’m not ready to share.”
He mulled this over and found it reasonable. His goal for tonight was reconciliation. Why push for more? He didn’t need her total surrender. She was offering him another chance to win her over in bed.
A warning sounded in the back of his mind, however, because he still hadn’t told her the entire truth about Mike. Jason knew it was wrong to continue a relationship with her under false pretenses, but it was the same quandary as always—telling her meant losing her.
When she lifted her lips to his, he stopped thinking about right or wrong.
He stopped thinking, period. He kissed her with abandon, with every ounce of longing he’d felt since he’d touched her last. She tasted like mint and ale, an unexpectedly delicious mix, and he groaned as her arms slid around his neck.
He plunged his tongue deeper because he couldn’t get enough of her mouth.
He wouldn’t be able to show restraint tonight.
She kissed him back passionately, seeming confident in her choice.
He loved the tug of her fingers in his hair, the curl of her tongue around his, the brush of her breasts against his chest. He maneuvered her onto the closest surface, the unfinished kitchen countertop.
She made a sound of excitement and wrapped her legs around his hips.
He swelled with arousal, his hands roving the curves of her body.
She broke the kiss to remove her blouse, and the last of his reservations fled. She was wearing a beige bra with lacy cups that molded to her shape. The fabric was so sheer and delicate that it almost looked like she’d dipped her breasts in sugar.
His mouth actually watered at the sight. “This is what you wear under your library clothes?”
She smiled at the question. “Touch me.”
“My calluses…”
“I like your calluses.”
He knew that. He made another attempt to communicate before his brain short-circuited. “They might ruin the fabric.”
“Ruin it,” she said simply, pulling his hand to her breast.
He cupped her soft flesh and thumbed her pouty nipples while he took her mouth again.
His rough hands snagged on the delicate lace, but she didn’t complain.
She liked the contrast between them, and so did he.
He liked her feminine curves against the hard planes of his body.
He liked the idea of her pretty things getting tangled up with his sturdy work clothes.
She helped him out of his shirt, as if she was just as urgent to touch him.
Her palms skimmed his muscles, her gaze hot with appreciation.
He decided the countertop didn’t meet their needs. Neither did the sofa. He wanted room to maneuver, so he carried her toward the mattress. After he deposited her on it, she unbuttoned her pants and kicked them off.
The panties were matching. He could see everything.
Climbing on top of her, he kissed her pretty, parted lips once more before working his way south.
The cups of her bra were easy to push down.
Her nipples jutted up. He closed his mouth around one sweet tip, then the other.
Although the lingerie was sexy as hell, it was her body that really drove him crazy.
Her breasts, though small, were perfectly shaped.
Her skin was as smooth as honey, her nipples taut little nubs.
He laved and sucked them until she squirmed with impatience.
“Please,” she moaned.
“Please what?”
She shoved at his chest, so he moved off her.
“Am I going too slow?” he asked.
Her hands slid from his pecs to his belt.
He watched her unbuckle it, transfixed. Then she released the buttons of his fly, lowered the waistband of his boxer shorts, and closed her slender hand around his cock.
She appeared to like this part of him as much as she liked his chest, and she liked his chest a lot.
He groaned as she stroked him up and down with aching lassitude.
He shouldn’t have teased her about going slow.
When she lowered her head to him, he inhaled a sharp breath.
She touched her lips to the blunt tip before pressing soft kisses along the turgid length.
God. Now she was going to make him beg, wasn’t she?
With a seductive smile, she gave him what he wanted. Her open mouth and silky tongue enveloped him. The pleasure was so intense he felt transformed by it. Time and place seemed to disintegrate as she sucked him. He threaded his fingers through her hair and let the heady sensations wash over him.
Then reality rushed back in when he realized he was seconds from the brink. He pulled away from her, his breaths ragged.
“I was enjoying that,” she protested.
“So was I. Believe me.”
She seemed about to say more, so he quieted her lush mouth with another kiss.
His cock pulsed with arousal as he climbed on top of her again.
Ignoring its persistent throb, he moved his way down her belly.
Her stomach quivered as he nuzzled it. His plan was to strip off her lacy panties and lick her until she screamed.
He got distracted by her lingerie again, however.
There was a wet spot right where he wanted to kiss.
The fabric had been near-transparent before.
Now, it was sticking to her like damp tissue.
He’d never seen anything sexier. With a strangled groan, he spread her supple thighs with his hands and pressed his mouth to the gossamer fabric.
He licked her through it, making the wet spot wider.
She moaned a weak protest, but he didn’t let up.
Holding her in place, he teased her with his tongue until she was trembling.
Only then did he ease the crotch of her panties aside and study her soaked slit.
“Stop teasing me,” she panted. Her hips tilted up in a desperate plea.
He smiled at the order and went to work on her. She was so primed it only took a few flicks of his tongue to finish her. She bucked against his mouth, fisting her hands in his hair until the quakes subsided.
When he lifted his head, she pushed at his shoulder weakly. He eased onto his back, watching as she finally removed her panties.
He needed to be inside her immediately before he exploded. Shucking out of his jeans, he found a condom and rolled it down his jutting length. She didn’t wait for him to reposition himself over her; she climbed on top and took control.