Page 38 of Cowboy’s Last Stand (His to Protect #1)

Jason hadn’t spoken to Tyler since he’d reached the midway point of the Continental Divide Trail.

Tyler had been supportive of his journey.

A former combat veteran who’d turned to military consulting, Tyler had a generous spirit and a laidback attitude.

Jason flipped open his phone and scrolled through his recent contacts.

He used his phone so infrequently Tyler was near the top.

Jason considered his friend’s schedule, which revolved around surfing.

Right now, Tyler would be finished with his morning session.

Before he could rethink the impulse, Jason called him.

Tyler answered on the second ring. “What’s up.”

“It’s Jason.”

“I know,” Tyler said. “That’s why I answered.”

“What are you doing?”

“Coming in from a sesh.”

“How was it?”

“Perfect. I got barreled in the last set.”

Jason leaned back against the couch, picturing the blue-green waves rolling into San Diego’s Sunset Cliffs.

He listened to Tyler wax poetic about the weather and conditions.

Surfing had similar qualities to tai chi, as a meditative sport.

Jason shared some stories from the trail that only a fellow nature lover would appreciate.

“Are you still hiking?” Tyler asked.

“No. I’m done.”

“So what’s next?”

Jason sighed heavily. He didn’t know where to start. “I got a job offer from Bradley. Training EOD techs.”

“At Camp P?”

“Yeah.”

“Sweet.”

“I haven’t decided to take it.”

“Why not?”

“I might stay here.”

Tyler let out a low whistle. “You might choose Texas over San Diego? I think your brain’s still scrambled.”

“I need your advice.”

“Shoot.”

“You know why I came here.”

“I know why you claimed you were going there.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing,” he said, his voice muffled. “Go on.”

“Well, I didn’t tell her about Mike. I mean, I told her what happened in Kabul. I just didn’t mention his name.”

“I don’t follow you.”

Jason gave his friend a brief summary of the past two weeks.

It wasn’t easy to explain his actions. The decisions he’d made in the heat of the moment didn’t hold up to scrutiny, but Tyler listened with patience.

Jason finally stopped trying to justify what he’d done and admitted that he’d slept with Natalie.

“Let me get this straight,” Tyler said. “You went there to visit a fallen comrade’s widow and tell the story about him sacrificing his life for yours. Instead of having that discussion, you Jody’d her.”

“I didn’t Jody her,” Jason said. The term referred to a man who seduced a soldier’s wife or girlfriend while he was deployed. “You can’t Jody a widow.”

“You can, and you did.”

“I’m in love with her,” Jason said.

Tyler fell silent for a moment. He didn’t question Jason’s feelings. He seemed to accept the statement at face value, as if falling in love under these insane circumstances was normal. “That’s a tangle, man.”

“What should I do?”

“You should tell her the truth.”

“She’s not even speaking to me right now. I told her she should move on with her life. She’s got a goddamned shrine to Mike in her living room, and she won’t spend the settlement even though she’s strapped for cash.”

“He was a decorated veteran, killed in action,” Tyler said gently. “You know how they’re memorialized. The widows are expected to grieve forever.”

“It’s been two years. She was only married four.”

“Do not say that to her. Whatever you do.”

Jason held his tongue with difficulty.

“You already said it, didn’t you?”

“Can you help me or not?”

Seabirds cawed in the background. Jason pictured Tyler standing at the edge of cliffs by Neptune Blvd. He lived in a condo less than a block from the beach. “You went to bed with her, and now she won’t talk to you?”

“Right.”

“How was it?”

“Good.”

“For her too?”

“Of course,” Jason said, irritated by the question. He had no doubts about her pleasure. “Maybe a little too good.”

“There’s no such thing.”

“OK, but I think she felt guilty because she enjoyed it so much. She started crying, and I asked her about the death gratuity.”

Tyler sputtered his disbelief. “You asked her about a death settlement after boning her? Are you off your meds?”

Jason laughed, dragging a hand down his face. “You know I am.”

“Maybe you should go back on them.”

“I’m sleeping indoors again.”

“Really?”

“All this week.”

“How are the nightmares?”

“Not as bad as they were,” he said after a pause. “It’s bearable.”

“I’m glad.”

Jason cleared his throat. “Do you think I have a chance with her?”

Tyler took his time to answer. He was a good friend, but he wasn’t going to lie to Jason to make him feel better.

“If you’re serious about her, you have to be honest and hope for the best. Apologize for everything you said.

Get her flowers, take her out to dinner, and tell her the truth. She might forgive you.”

“What if she doesn’t?”

“Then you cut your losses and come back to San Diego.”

Jason’s heart clenched at the thought.

“It’s not the worst place to heal,” Tyler said. “You can surf and cry at the same time, and no one can tell.”

“Is that what you do?”

“Yep.”

Jason chuckled at the response, though he doubted Tyler was joking. There was a reason the soul surfer had retired from combat duty. His overseas experiences had been traumatic. “What were you going to say before? About why I came here?”

“I’ve seen pictures of her.”

“Where?”

“Online. The media took photos at his funeral.”

Jason hadn’t seen them, but he could imagine the invasion of privacy. It disturbed him. “So?”

“She’s a beautiful woman.”

“Are you saying I came to seduce her?”

“Did you?”

Jason swore under his breath. His fingertips clenched around the phone so tight he thought it might break.

“I’m not judging you either way,” Tyler said.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m asking you to be careful—and cognizant.”

“Cognizant,” Jason muttered.

“Self-awareness is the enemy of self-destruction.”

“Are you quoting Yoda?”

“Very funny. Did you find your sense of humor in the woods?”

Jason felt some of his tension ebb away. Although the conversation was serious, Tyler’s tone was jovial. They could still joke around with each other. “That reminds me. I read an article about the health benefits of surfing the other day.”

“Oh?”

“They interviewed a forty-year-old surfer who said he felt twenty. Unfortunately, he looked sixty.”

Tyler laughed in his low, lazy way. The sound was music to Jason’s ears. He was older than Jason by five years and so far seemed immune to the aging effects of sun and saltwater. “Have you heard the latest from Montana?”

Jason played along. “No.”

“This poor old man was trying to play a round of golf in the snow.”

“What happened to him?”

“He froze his balls.”

They both laughed at the dumb joke. It felt good to rib each other the way they used to before his accident.

The last time they’d talked, Tyler hadn’t joked at all.

He’d been worried, Jason realized. After the traumatic brain injury and slow recovery, everyone had walked on eggshells around him.

Jason hadn’t liked some of Tyler’s questions today, but he appreciated his directness.

“It’s good to hear your voice,” Jason said.

“Likewise.”

Jason promised to call again with an update later in the week. He hung up and paced the apartment, considering Tyler’s advice.

Buy flowers. Apologize. Tell the truth.

He should have done all of these things days ago.

He hadn’t because her criticism of him had stung and because he was afraid of losing her.

He knew how she’d react to the truth. Selfishly, he’d wanted to take her to bed before he told her, to have her and hold her at least once more before she threw him out.

Jason mulled over his options while he retiled the kitchen.

In the early afternoon, he showered and put on fresh clothes.

He donned his new Stetson and went to a local flower shop for a cheerful bouquet in fall colors.

It was nearly Thanksgiving, he realized.

He drove to the library and parked near her car.

She would get off work in twenty minutes.

While he waited, sweating despite the chill in the air, a squad car pulled into the parking lot.

Wade Hendricks.

He was the last person Jason wanted to see, other than Billy Hendricks.

Wade might just be doing his job, ensuring public safety, but his presence rankled.

Natalie had given Wade the cold shoulder after sleeping with him, and she’d just done the same thing to Jason.

There was also the fact that Wade was a law enforcement officer who could check into Jason’s background and report back to Natalie.

Jason exited the vehicle, flowers in hand. He strode past the squad car without pausing to acknowledge the deputy.

Ready or not, he had to act now.