Page 44 of Covet (The Red #3)

Chapter Forty-Four

Elle

Listen to Stay Inside this dream

by Leslie Powell

W ith shaky hands, I texted Landon and told her we needed to talk.

I already had missed texts from Gabby. I figured she heard about the break-up and was trying to get info. As much as I wanted to spill my guts, I knew Landon was the first person I had to connect with. Especially with her situation. She’d be the only one to understand.

Ten minutes later, Landon called. I picked up and she cut through any casual greetings. “What’s wrong?”

“Landon. Something happened and I need help.”

“Tell me. We’ll solve it together.”

I burst into tears and spilled the story. Sometimes, I had to stop to gather my breath, but I pushed through and spared no detail. When I was done, my chest felt less tight. Holding secrets was the worst punishment of all.

Landon was quiet for a while. I saw the obvious shock on her face, but she didn’t yell or harass me with endless questions. “Okay, Elle. This is a lot.”

I spit out a laugh. “I know. That’s why I called.”

“I can’t believe the same thing is happening to you. What is with us? Why couldn’t we just shut up, stay safe, and keep our hearts in locked mode? Adam blew mine open. And now Noah’s doing it to you.”

“It’s so bad. Not only did I cheat, but Daisy is the nicest, sweetest person on the planet and she’s going to hate me.

And Coop? Oh, my God, he’ll try to beat Noah up and we’ll have another fall out like before.

” I began to panic and re-consider my original idea to confront Noah with the truth of my feelings.

“Maybe I should wait. Just break up with Coop and keep my mouth shut. Let Noah go on with his life and be happy with Daisy. Right?”

“No.” A deep sigh spilled from her lips.

She gazed directly into the screen and spoke with a serious, deliberate tone.

“Babe, it’s too late to put Pandora back in the box.

Sounds to me like Noah loves you. He’s with Daisy because he’s trying to convince himself it’s better this way.

He’s afraid Coop will always be your first choice.

If you give him the chance, Noah will take the leap and go through the fire for you. I know it.”

“How?” I cried out. “How do you know? Maybe I’ll make things worse?”

“It’s going to get worse before it gets better,” Landon said gently. “You need to know that going in. And be strong. But if Noah’s yours, it’ll be worth it. Do you really love Noah?”

“Yes. I thought maybe it was the music but it’s so much more, Landon. I can’t explain it. When I’m with him, I feel…”

“Whole.”

Goosebumps broke out on my skin. “Exactly.”

“You go through the fire, then. First, you need to face Coop and break it off. Then, you reach out to Noah and talk to him. Tell the truth. Put it all out there.”

“What if he rejects me?”

“That’s his choice. But for you, Elle? Breaking up with Coop is what you have to do anyway—with or without Noah.”

Landon was right. I nodded, slowly calming. My life was a complete wreck, but I saw the small, flickering light ahead. I needed to grow up and take responsibility or I’d be in a relationship that didn’t make me happy. “Okay. I’ll do it. I wish you were here.”

“I’m getting on the next plane, girlfriend. Don’t wait for me, though. Power through and I’ll be with you every step of the way for the fallout.”

Tears stung my eyes. “Love you.”

“Love you more.”

After the conversation, I was ready. I called Coop and asked him to come over.

He arrived in record time and my heart ached as I studied his mussed hair, bleary eyes, and wrinkled clothes from last night.

He hung his head like a remorseful puppy.

“Elle, I’m sorry for all that shit I said last night. I’m so glad you want to talk.”

I nodded and kept calm, even as nausea threatened. “Me, too. I did a lot of thinking last night. I know I threw a bunch of stuff at you. I didn’t mean to hurt you, Coop.”

“Maybe we hurt each other. We’re going to be better. You’ll see.”

I ignored my crazy pounding heart and sweaty palms. “I haven’t changed my mind. I still want to break up. I need to be honest with myself, and stop denying how my feelings changed, even though hurting you is killing me. It’s nothing specific that you did. Please try to understand.”

He jerked back, his eyes pleading. “Elle, I can’t understand. It feels like this is coming out of nowhere. You’re giving up on us?”

I nodded. “I am. I have to. I can’t be in this relationship anymore. I want different things.”

“What? I’ll give you anything you want.”

I gazed at him sadly. “We don’t make each other truly happy, Coop. And you deserve so much more. You deserve a woman who loves you with her whole heart.”

“You do! You’re just afraid to take the next step, which is fine, we can wait a bit.”

I bit my trembling lip and forced myself to say the words. “You don’t have what I need in a relationship. Not for long term.”

His emotions turned and the pain spiraled into anger.

“I don’t believe this. I’ve done nothing but try and make you happy and this is what I get?

Fine. I don’t have what you need, huh? Funny I seemed to give you exactly that any time you wanted.

How you gonna get those needs met now?” he sneered.

“Who’s gonna fuck you the way you need, Elle? ”

I stood still, stayed silent, and took his wrath.

“I’m done with you. When you change your mind and realize I was the best thing that happened to you, don’t try to come back. You make me sick.”

Coop stormed out. I was shaking but it was done. At least, the first part.

I thought of the repercussions as each of my friends discovered what I’d done. But there was no going back. My whole being cried out for me to dive into the conflicted mess I’d created and finish it.

I needed to see Noah.