Page 23 of Covet (The Red #3)

Chapter Twenty-Three

Elle

Listen to Heart by Heart

by Joe Jonas

“ N oah, I can’t do it.”

Frustration bubbled up as I blew out a breath. Twisting my hair into a messy bun, I turned from the mic and began to pace. It had been hours working on the song JJ wanted us to perform and nothing was right. I knew what was needed but simply couldn’t bring it.

Dusty piped through the mic. “Want to take a break guys? We have some good stuff.”

“How long do we have the studio today?” Noah asked.

“Till nine. Plenty of time. Let’s take an hour break?

Noah looked at me and I nodded. “Sounds good,” he said. I watched Aaron and Dusty gather some stuff and leave the booth. I felt awful, as if I’d let everyone down.

“Don’t.” Noah’s voice interrupted my self-flagellation. “Stop beating yourself up. You need to eat.”

“I had breakfast.”

“But not lunch. I brought a turkey club—we’re sharing it.”

I wanted to say no, but he began unwrapping the sandwich and my stomach growled. “Fine. Is there mayo?”

“I thought you knew me, Elle.”

I grinned and sat next to him at the keyboard. We ate in comfortable silence. He dumped a small bag of chips out and split them evenly. The salt and crunch gave me a burst of clarity. “I think I suck at pop songs.”

He didn’t answer for a while. Methodically finished his half, cleaned his fingers, and finally spoke. “You’re too in your head. Trying to act cool and sing like Charlie X or Tate McCrae is blocking the real you.”

“I notice you didn’t say Taylor Swift.”

“Duh. No one is in her orbit.”

I couldn’t help laughing. He looked calm and together at the keyboard the entire time we struggled, while I was falling apart.

Not once had he gotten pissed at my inability to hit the lyrics right.

They felt wrong in my mouth, as if I was trying to impersonate something I wasn’t. “I feel weird singing the song.”

He looked at me thoughtfully. Noah took everything I said with seriousness and never tried to placate me. “Yeah? Hmm, maybe I’m not seeing something important. Which part feels weird?”

“I feel like I’m singing about being hot for someone but it’s clunky. Fake.” I got up again and resumed pacing, trying to untangle the issue. “Even the title, Hot in the Club is a bit––”

“Overdone? Cliché?” Noah asked.

“Yes! I mean, leave the word hot to Paris Hilton. It needs more fire.”

The moment I uttered the word, we turned and stared at each other. The room sparked with the familiar energy of when we worked together, creating magic from nothing. Noah grinned. “Fire. What if?—”

“We change the title to Call it Fire and switch up the chorus?” I finished.

Noah dove for the notepad, and we began tearing stuff apart, putting things back together, and came up with a tweaked concept. I began to sing:

No talk, just tension—skin on spark,

Pull me closer, light up the dark.

Call it fire, call it wrong ? —

Call it burning all night long.

Bodies talk, no need for names,

You and me, just play the flames.

Call it fire… yeah, call it mine

“So much better,” Noah mumbled, mixing sounds together to make it grittier. “Keep the pop but put some sexy into it. Make it?—”

“Dirtier,” I said. “It needs grit and?—”

Noah jumped in with some bigger sounds, immediately urging me to move as the rhythm worked through my body. I closed my eyes, shook my hips and head, and let it pour out.

Boy, you walk in like a problem I want to solve,

Heat in your eyes, and I’m already involved.

Your hands say sin, your mouth says "come,"

Heartbeat's dirty and the night just begun.

“Yes,” Noah said, pounding the keys. “Keep going, Elle”

Suddenly, Dusty and Aaron were back in the booth. Immediately, they caught the energy pumping between us and jumped in. They spoke over the mic with Noah, and Aaron began to pull in some new sounds perfectly balanced what we’d created.

Noah’s voice directed the way. “Lighten up the next chorus, bring it back to pop. Keep moving the vibe back and forth. Blast the final words, call it fire, yeah, call it mine.”

I followed instructions, repeating the song over and over, until it became a part of me and I rose to meet the possibility. Everything I’d been searching for these past few hours clicked, and all I had to do was chase the feeling…chase the song…chase the end.

I finished, letting my voice slowly fade into silence. Slowly, I opened my eyes.

Dusty and Aaron burst into applause and I laughed in relief, removing my headphones.

Noah grabbed me by the waist and swung me around.

“Yes—that was incredible!” he yelled, making me laugh harder.

His body felt good against mine, solid and hard, but comforting.

He wasn’t as tall as Coop, which put us at a perfect height with my head able to rest against his shoulder.

I caught the scent of his skin and fought back the sudden longing to linger in his embrace.

“Took me long enough,” I joked, stepping back to safety.

“Don’t say that.” His words were firm as he shook his head.

“You blow me away, Elle. With each song, you keep getting better.” His face reflected an open excitement that was contagious.

It was hard not to feel like a queen when I was around Noah.

Normally, I’d call bullshit on all the compliments but his eyes held a fierce flare of approval and respect that didn’t lie. His belief in me only made me better.

“Thanks.”

Our gazes met and locked. I fell into those calm gray eyes like a shelter from a storm, even as my heart beat rapidly at his nearness. The tap of the microphone broke the moment.

Dusty spoke. “Guys, that was perfect. Good work. It’s a wrap for today.”

We thanked everyone and began to gather our stuff. “Are you all set for Friday in Brooklyn?” Noah asked.

“Yes. Are you and Daisy getting a room? It’s going to be so late, Coop and I figured we’d crash somewhere close. I hate public transportation at 3am.”

“I’ll text the hotel we’re booking. It’s cheap and close to the club.” He turned and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Are you nervous?”

I groaned. “Yes! I have audition butterflies, but this is worse because it’s live, and if I mess up, it’s not something I can fix on camera. Plus, what if JJ decides I’m not as talented as he first thought? Singing in a studio is different than in person.”

His lip quirked. “It’s going to be worse. Once JJ hears you live, you’re going to ruin him.”

The simple words crashed through my barriers and warmed me from the inside out.

Noah wasn’t afraid to show his emotions like Coop.

I’d begun to realize my love language was more words of affirmation than I’d originally thought, where Coop’s was physical touch.

During sex, we both got what we needed, but outside of it?

I wasn’t a big hugger or clingy type, and Coop motivated me, treating me like a personal training client who needed to be whipped into shape. “It’s just one song.”

Noah shook his head. “You don’t see it. How you make people feel when you sing. It’s a gift, Elle. I recognized it back when we first met and heard you belting out Arianna Grande with Landon.”

I let out a giggle. “Oh, my God, I remember that! You asked if I’d like to work with you on some music and I said no. That I was an actress.”

“And I said?—”

“You can be both.”

“Yes! I just never thought of myself as a singer. Until…” I trailed off.

“Until Adam. JJ’s not an idiot—he saw the talent you had.”

I shook my head. “No, not Adam. You.” He blinked, surprise lighting his rough features. “You wouldn’t let it go, and had this crazy-ass belief in me I’d never experienced before. You led me here, Noah.”

The silence prickled with awareness. We stared at one another, recognizing something was happening between us but not brave or stupid enough to tempt Fate. It was as if we kept circling around the tension, playing with the fire, but neither of us would jump into the pit.

Because there were other people involved.

I gave a shuddering breath and forced a smile. “Sorry, that was a lot.”

He laughed but it was like my smile. Forced. “All this creative energy. I’m sure Coop feels the same way about his photography.”

“Actually, no. When we first got together, I thought it was his true passion, like me and acting. But since he’s been working on the gym with Max, I have to admit he’s suddenly lit up.

He talks about it endlessly and is on fire to get up in the morning.

” I wrinkled my nose in thought. “Maybe the rejection and chasing jobs was too much for him. Like how I felt after endless auditions and disappointment. Coop’s changing. ”

It should be strange talking about Coop, but Noah only nodded with a deep understanding he always brought to our conversations. “You both are, Elle. Him with the gym, you with music. I guess we were silly to think our group could just keep coasting without any challenges. We’re growing up.”

“Sounds like we’re starring in a TV pilot,” I joked.

“Are you guys still fighting a lot?” he asked tentatively.

“It’s better. We’re both so busy doing our own thing, we don’t have time to fight anymore.” I shifted my feet and asked what I was dying to know. “What about you and Daisy? You always seem great together.”

I waited for him to laugh and agree but a frown creased his brow. “We are.”

Noah didn’t elaborate, but his gray eyes held a worry I couldn’t ignore. “Then why don’t you sound like it?”

His rush of breath held a tinge of frustration.

“I don’t know. Since I met Daisy, I know she’s the best thing to happen to me.

She rarely complains and supports my work no matter how difficult it is with the crowds and the hours.

Do you know she literally saved someone’s life while we were out for dinner last week? ”

I gasped. “No, she didn’t tell me!”

“A guy dropped on the floor, and she just handled it like it was nothing. She’s the type of person whose work really makes a difference. Most of the time, I think she’s too good for me and I have no right to complain about anything.”

“That’s a hard ideal to hold,” I said slowly. “Believing your partner is better than you. I’m sure she has tons of faults.”

Noah scraped his palm over his buzz cut. “Honestly? Not many. We rarely fight. If I ask for something or get irritated, she’s cheerful and smooths things over. Gives me sex any time I want. I have everything I ever wanted, without even having to search.”

His words fell into a lingering silence, one with seething questions and undercurrents.

I poked at them gently, not knowing how far I’d go.

“I can’t argue with you, Noah. She’s the glue we desperately needed in our friend group.

I knew Daisy was special the moment you introduced her, and she’s become a great friend. ”

“Exactly. I’m lucky, right?”

My voice softened. “Yes. But are you…happy?”

He blinked. “Wouldn’t you be happy if Coop did everything you wanted and never gave you shit?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m more complicated than that. Or simply more screwed up.”

Noah gave a mocking laugh. “Well, that’s me. She asked if we can move in together and I just stared at her like an asshole. Gave some excuse about giving us more time to get through the holidays and re-visit in the new year. She graduates in June.”

Shock barreled through me. I wasn’t sure why—Coop and I had been talking seriously about it before our fights began to explode.

But imagining that final committed step with Noah and Daisy made my stomach clench with dread.

I tried to tell myself it was jealousy they were flourishing while my relationship struggled but I knew it was a lie.

“June is a good target date,” I said with fake cheer.

“It’ll give you enough time to adjust. Coop and Max will be opening their gym, too. We’ll have lots to celebrate.”

“Yeah. Are you and Coop still talking about moving in together?”

I hesitated. “We decided to wait until we get back on track.”

He reached out, his fingers brushing mine. A tingle shot down my arm at the contact. “Relationships are complicated. I’m sure you’ll both…work it out.”

“Same with you.”

We stared at one another. I wanted to step forward and yank his head down, put my mouth over his, and let the world burn around us. I wanted to forget about morals and Coop and Daisy and the complicated mess of feelings surging inside me.

But I didn’t.

“I’ll see you Friday.”

He nodded. “You’ll slay. See you then.”

I walked away with my gaze straight ahead, even though I wanted to look back. Friday would be safe. Everyone would be there in celebration mode. Things would go back to normal.

I had no idea what was coming for all of us.