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TWENTY

ZEKE

I HAVEN’T TALKED about Kendra in years. There was no one to talk about her with.

I probably shouldn’t have brought her up now. I don’t want to burden Savannah with my own awful fucking story. She has enough of her own suffering to face, the last thing she needs is to see mine.

But when she asked me what happened, it all came pouring out. The pieces of my pain falling one by one as she held onto me. Like she thought she could hold them all together.

I’m not convinced she was wrong.

“You’re right.” Savanna holds my gaze. “You make me feel safe enough I can be brave.” She gives me a hesitant smile. “You hold the space while I prove I’m strong.” Her eyes move over my face. “You keep me steady while I try to find my balance again.” Her hands come to my face, resting a palm on each of my cheeks. “I’m saving myself, but you’re right behind me, ready to catch me when I fall.”

Her eyes dip to my mouth, the tip of her tongue darting out to wet her lips as she pauses. “I didn’t like it when you left. When you were here and I was all the way in Alaska. I felt so alone.” Her gaze returns to mine. “And then when I saw you covered in blood…” She pulls in a breath like she’s about to say more.

Instead she pushes up on her toes and presses her mouth right against mine.

I freeze, shocked. My brain shorts out, unable to process what’s happening.

But then Savannah’s hands fall from my face, her arms lacing around my neck as her fingers dig into the hair at my nape and her soft body presses flush to mine. When her tongue slicks against the seam of my lips, I’m gone, unable to find even a tiny bit of the control I know I possess.

I lace a hand in the soft strands of her dark hair, using the other to pin her against me as I get my first taste of her. She’s just as sweet as I would have expected, and it makes me want more. Need more.

I turn our bodies and pin her against the railing, claiming her mouth as I breathe in her scent.

“Mommy, what is that man doing to that lady?”

I stiffen, the world coming back into focus around me as I lift my head to find a little boy standing practically level with us on the walkway that winds through the trees and waterfalls. His face is all scrunched up in disgust and one accusing finger is pointed right at me. Where the fuck was this kid five minutes ago when I needed to hear that question?

What am I doing to Savannah? Nothing acceptable, that’s for fucking sure.

I back away from her, one hand raking through my hair as my eyes go anywhere but to her. “I should go call Isaac. Touch base. Make sure everything’s okay.”

The words aren’t even all the way out of my mouth before I’m turning tail, running away like the fucking coward I am. I should apologize for what just happened. Tell her how sorry I am.

Except, I’m not sorry. And that’s a huge fucking problem.

I manage to have enough sense to grab a room key before stalking out into the hallway, refusing to look back as the door closes behind me. If I see Savannah, there’s no telling what I might do. Especially if her skin is flushed the way it sometimes is.

I assumed the blush was from embarrassment. Now I’m wondering if it was something else pinking up her pretty skin.

“Fuck.” I rake one hand through my hair again as I go for the elevator. After taking it down to the first floor, I duck through the sliding door leading outside. I need air.

And my ass kicked.

Since I doubt I can come up with a way to ethically achieve the latter, I dig out my phone and make the call I used as an excuse. Isaac picks up, apologizing the second the call connects.

“I’m sorry, man. I swear I thought you said one room, so that’s what I booked.” He genuinely sounds sorry, but it doesn’t fix my fucking problem. There’s no way I can share a room with Savannah. Not now.

Not if I want to keep things right between us.

“Find me another room. Make it happen. I don’t care what it takes.” I pace along the sidewalk, ignoring the odd looks I get from the people coming and going. “Have Heidi hack into their system and change someone’s reservation.”

“I mean,” he hesitates, “I can ask, but I’m not sure she’ll do it. Even if she does, it won’t change anything tonight. We have to wait until people check out of their rooms.”

I stop, letting my head fall back as I take a deep breath, trying to calm the panic and frustration crawling across my skin. “First thing tomorrow. Get her on it.” I disconnect the call because I don’t want to hear him tell me I’m fucked. That the chances of Heidi kicking some unsuspecting couple—or family—out of their room are slim to none. Which means I’m faced with multiple nights of Savannah sleeping beside me.

I struggle with sleep enough as it is. Having her right there will make it nearly impossible to rest. My only hope is to exhaust myself to the point I pass out.

And pray there aren’t any incidents.

The hotel has a gym—my usual drug of choice—but I left my bag in the room and the tactical pants and boots I’m wearing will make me even more conspicuous than normal. Without a coat, the chilly air is starting to sink into my skin, so I decide to kill two birds with one stone and I start to jog, cutting across the self-park lot to a less populated area.

Then I run like my life depends on it, plowing through the snow covered green space surrounding the hotel and adjoining shopping mall.

An hour later, I’m dripping with sweat and my body aches. I’m ready to drop when I quietly let myself into the room and let out a sigh of relief when I find the lights off and the soft sound of Savannah breathing as she sleeps.

I put every bit of my training to use as I collect a pair of sleep pants and creep into the bathroom where I quickly shower and brush my teeth. The room is still quiet when I sneak to the empty bed and slide beneath the covers.

Thankfully, my plan works and my head barely hits the pillow before sleep takes me under.