Page 22

How could her body feel so heavy? Her feet were barely kicking anymore, and her arms weren't really doing much of anything to propel her through the cold, rough water. It was likely only Jake’s hold on her that kept her moving forward.

If he let go …

She couldn’t help but feel like she would just float away and disappear.

There had been a lot of times as a kid that she wished she could just stop existing. Not in a she wanted to end her own life kind of way, just in a she didn't matter to anyone way, and she was tired of trying to earn love and affection that would never be given.

Jake had kept her alive back then.

And Jake was keeping her alive now.

His steady presence was the only thing that kept her going.

Everything else had receded into a haze. There was no fear anymore, she didn't have the energy for it. There wasn't sadness for what felt like her impending death. There was nothing. Just the knowledge that she had to keep moving.

A huge wave crashed into her, and for a second, she went under.

No match for the fierce ocean, she struggled and spluttered, tried not to inhale the salty water that was a threat in more ways than one. It wasn't just that the sea could drown her and Jake if it so chose, but if they drank too much of the salty water, it would poison their bodies.

Jake’s hand kept her from being swept away.

Until it didn't.

The second his hold on her slipped as the waves tossed him about as well, she was gone.

Dragged away into the darkness.

Serious about her intention to share the life jacket, Jake was the one wearing it. Now without his steadying hold keeping her afloat, she started sinking quickly.

Even though she didn't want to die, didn't want to give up and let the ocean claim her, Alannah didn't have enough left in her to fight against the inevitable.

Bit by bit, the water dragged her down.

It was actually warmer down under the surface away from the pounding rain and relentless wind. A little gentler as well since there were no waves crashing on her.

The warmth made her sleepy.

It couldn’t hurt to close her eyes just for a moment, could it?

That would be so nice.

So peaceful.

Just one moment of rest.

Then she’d start swimming again.

She deserved it after hours of fighting her way through the impenetrable sea.

Her eyes fluttered closed.

One second just to …

The sting of rain hitting her skin had her jerking upright, and she found herself back above the surface, Jake’s hand clutching her sodden long-sleeve T-shirt. Fisted in the material with a tightness she felt even though he was holding the clothes and not her body.

When she blinked and looked at him, she could see raw fear on his face.

Had she done that?

She hadn't wanted to scare him, she’d just needed one second to rest.

“S-sor-ry,” she stammered, her teeth chattering wildly.

Now that she had her head above the water again, any warmth she’d felt had evaporated and she was back to freezing cold, her entire body shaking with the force of it.

At least it was shivering, her body hadn't completely given in to hypothermia yet, but it would.

That was inevitable.

As inevitable as both their deaths if they didn't find land soon.

Jake couldn’t be any warmer than she was, and he had to be every bit as exhausted. He was highly trained, and she knew he worked out every day, brutal workouts, totally incomparable to what she did at the gym. But sooner or later he would wear out too.

“Thought I lost you when the waves ripped you out of my hand,” Jake said. His voice was still strong above the roar of the storm.

Or …

Maybe the storm was dying down.

The wind wasn't whipping into her as strongly as it had been before she went under, and the rain was easing off, more drizzling now than pounding down like a million little stones against her unprotected body.

There was a faint light to the sky rather than the oppressive darkness, and the waves weren't quite as strong.

Was it possible that the worst of the storm had passed them by?

“Here, you need this more than I do. I'm not taking another turn, so don’t bother asking because I won't humor you again,” Jake snapped as he shrugged out of the life jacket and slipped it over her arms, doing up the straps to secure it to her chest.

While his tone was harsh, she knew it wasn't because he was angry with her, it was just because he was afraid. The storm might be dying down, but they were still exhausted and cold. They had to find land soon or it was going to be too late.

“I think we’re finally through the worst of it,” Jake said, echoing her thoughts.

What he didn't say also echoed everything she’d just been thinking. This was a reprieve, it wasn't a solution.

“Sorry, sunshine, but we’re going to have to keep moving. I know you're exhausted, but the longer we stay still, the more we give hypothermia a chance to settle in.”

Even though swimming was the last thing she wanted to do, Alannah knew that staying still was just signing her death warrant.

Jake’s too. Because there was no way he was going to leave her alone.

If she was too exhausted to move, he’d stay right by her side even if it cost him his life.

Or he’d pull her along with him and deplete his own supplies of energy in the process.

Above them, the sky continued to lighten, and as she went to tell Jake that she could keep swimming for as long as she needed to, even if that was pretty much a lie, she saw it.

The impossible.

It had to be a mirage.

Yet the longer she looked, the more it formed rather than shimmering away into nothing.

“Jake, look,” she said, pointing behind him.

She knew the second he registered what she had seen because some of the tension left his body. If Jake saw it too, it had to be real.

“That’s … land. Right?” she asked, just in case this was in fact some sort of shared hallucination, the cold and exhaustion finally getting to them.

“It’s land, sunshine,” Jake confirmed, excitement in his voice.

It was still a distance away, and honestly, she wasn't sure she had the energy to make it, but the fading storm and the hope that ignited inside her rejuvenated her.

They could do this.

They had to do this.

With Jake keeping a hold on her like he had the entire time they’d been out there they both began to swim again.

It didn't take long for the rush of energy hope had given her to fade, and she was right back to struggling.

But she wasn't giving up.

Wasn't going to die within sight of land.

So she swam.

They swam.

Side by side.

Bit by bit the land grew bigger and bigger.

Closer and closer.

Then right as they approached the last hundred or so yards, she saw them.

Rocks.

Lots and lots of rocks lining the shore.

How on earth were they supposed to get past them without being broken into pieces?

Safety was so close and yet so far away.