Page 21 of Consummation (The Josh & Kat Trilogy #3)

“Whatever the increased odds were after missing one pill, I’m sure I would have taken them in advance, I just wanted to fuck you so goddamned much.”

Kat laughs through tears.

“I’m sorry I’ve been a prick this week—I guess I had some shit to work out.”

“You haven’t been a prick—you’ve just been extremely polite. ”

“I made you feel like you’re alone in this, and you’re not.”

Kat sniffles loudly but doesn’t say anything for a long beat. “I thought maybe you were done with me, Josh. I was scared you didn’t want me anymore.”

“Done with you? Are you mad? No fucking way.”

Kat breathes a huge sigh of relief .

“Are you done with me ?” I ask, holding my breath.

“No fucking way,” she says. “I’ll never be done with you, Josh. Never .”

My heart lurches like a guard dog on a leash. “So, hey, how ’bout that grape,” I say. “Pretty crazy, huh?”

“Crazy corn chowder,” Kat replies.

“That’s a total Henn-ism, you know.”

“I think that’s where I got it.” She sniffles again.

“Seeing the baby’s heartbeat made everything seem so real ,” I say softly.

“Totally,” she agrees. “This shit is real, man.”

“Crazy.”

“You know, it’s so weird,” she says quietly, “but when I saw the heartbeat, I started feeling protective about the grape—like I don’t want anything to happen to it, after all.”

“Immortality through reproduction, remember? It’s evolution, baby.”

“But I’ve never wanted a baby. I don’t even think babies are cute. They just look like tiny old men.”

“Your heart’s answering the call of the wild, babe.”

“But it’s so unlike me.”

“Yeah, I guess we’re both doing things we never thought we’d do, huh?” I pause, hoping Kat will address her soul-crushing rejection of me in the hospital, but she doesn’t. “So, hey, PG,” I say, clearing my throat. “It turns out I’m moving on Wednesday.”

“Yay,” she says.

“I’ve got to see you,” I say, my heart racing. Fuck me. That’s the understatement of the century.

“Shoot,” Kat says. “Wednesday’s not good for me. Colby’s getting out of the hospital and my entire family’s gonna hang out with him. Can we do Thursday?”

“Thursday it is. I’ll text you my new address. Seven o’clock?”

“Great. I can’t wait to see your new house.” She pauses. “I can’t wait to see you .”

“Same here. I’ve missed you,” I say. I clutch my chest. Jesus, I can barely breathe.

“Josh, I’ve missed you so much,” she whispers. “I’ve been feeling like I’m dying . ”

“Me, too, babe. Exactly. I’ve been in physical pain without you. You have no idea.”

I can hear her smiling over the phone line, even as she sniffles. “Really?”

“Hell yes. I’ve been miserable.”

“Me, too,” she says softly. She sniffles again. “I’ll be counting the minutes until Thursday. And maybe Friday, too? Because... you’ll be living here, so . . ?”

“Yep. Absolutely,” I say, breathing a sigh of relief. “You’ll be seeing me so much, you’ll get sick of me. I promise.”

Kat sniffles again. “Impossible. I could never get sick of you. Ever .”

My heart squeezes.

“Okay. Well. I gotta go,” Kat says. “I’m gonna hang up and sob my eyes out now.”

“Okay, babe. Have fun. Call me later.”

“I will,” Kat says. “I can’t wait to see you.”

“I can’t wait to see you, too. I miss you so much, babe.”

“I miss you, too—so, so, so, so much.”

“Don’t be sad anymore, Kat. I’m here now—and I’m not going anywhere.”

She starts bawling on the other end of the line and my heart shatters at the sound of her wails.

“It’s okay, baby,” I coo. “I’m right here. Don’t cry, beautiful. I’ll see you really soon.”

“Okay. I gotta go,” she murmurs, obviously still crying. “I’ll call you later after I pull myself together.”

“Wait, baby. Don’t go,” I say. “Don’t leave like this. You’re crying.”

“No, I’m okay. I gotta go. I wanna have an ugly cry on my own.”

“Okay, baby,” I say. “But call me again soon.”

We hang up and I sit, staring at my phone for a long moment. Oh my fucking God. I love her. I love Kat with all my heart and soul. And I’m gonna tell her so on Thursday—the way I should have told her at the hospital if I’d had an ounce of sense.

Kat was absolutely right to turn me down at the hospital.

Actually, I never should have proposed in the first place—I know that now.

I have no genuine desire to get married—I was just trying to appease the ghost of my father—get his absolution from the grave.

But fuck that. My father’s not here to disown me anymore, and even if he were, I’d tell him to fuck off.

Okay, fine, I’ve got a hot baby-momma-girlfriend.

So fucking what? It’s not the end of the world.

We’ll figure it out. The most important thing is that I love her—I know that now.

I love Kat. And when I see her on Thursday, I’m gonna tell her exactly how I feel, no holds barred—and I don’t need a fucking ring and the promise of a stupid piece of paper from the government to do it.

I’ll tell her straight from my heart and soul.

Oh shit. I’ve suddenly got a brilliant idea.

Oh my God, I’m a fucking genius. I close my laptop and leap up from the table, a surge of adrenaline flooding me.

“I’m going out, T-Rod!” I call to Theresa in the back of the house.

“Hang on,” Theresa’s voice calls from another room.

“Gotta go!” I yell, bounding toward the front door. “I’ve got something important to do!”

“Hang on a sec,” Theresa says, entering the room breathlessly. She’s holding a cardboard box.

“Sorry, T-Rod,” I say, striding toward the front door. “I’ve got something I’ve got to do.”

“Just take a quick peek at this stuff, Josh.” She holds up the box. “The movers were about to load this stuff onto the truck and I thought you might want to pull a few things out to take with you on Wednesday.”

“No. Whatever that stuff is, they can load it onto the truck.”

“But the truck’s gonna take four or five days to get to Seattle. Is there anything here you want to have with you the first night in your new house—you know, something to make it feel like home on your first night there?”

I’m exasperated. A house is just a house, for fuck’s sake—there’s no such thing as a home.

But, fine. Anything to make Theresa happy.

I peek inside the box and half-heartedly rummage through its contents for half a second.

“Nope. Nothing I care—” I shut my mouth.

Oh. Yep. There’s one thing I care about.

A whole lot, in fact. I pull it out reverently.

“Just this,” I say. I run my fingertip over the three smiling faces gazing back at me from the framed photo.

“Don’t let them load this onto the truck—I’ll take it with me in my bag. ”

Theresa nods. “I’ll put it into your carry-on—inside pocket. Don’t forget it’s there, okay? You don’t want it to break.”

“Thanks.”

“Of course.”

I turn toward the front door again. “Hey, T-Rod,” I say, turning back around to face her. Why don’t you give yourself a raise? Maybe, I dunno, twenty-five percent?”

Theresa smiles. “Thank you. Very generous of you.”

“And, hey, can you do something for me?”

“It’s my reason for living, Josh.”

“Arrange a romantic dinner-for-two at my new place in Seattle for Thursday night. Seven o’clock. I’m talking a top-rated chef, a waiter in a tux, flowers everywhere, candles all over the place—the whole nine yards. You know, a five-star-dining experience, but right in my own dining room.”

“No problem. But the truck won’t be there with your furniture until Saturday. I’ll have to rent some furniture for the night—at least a table and chairs.”

“Great. And as long as you’re renting stuff, would you rent me a pool table for a couple nights? I might wanna play pool before my table arrives—it always helps me relax.”

“Sure.”

“Oh, and rent me a really comfortable bed for Thursday night—a really nice one. Pillow-top mattress. Silk sheets. You know, the whole nine yards.”

“Josh, just a little tip: you never need to say the phrase ‘the whole nine yards’ to me. I know when it comes to you there are only two gears in everything you do: zero and ‘the whole nine yards.’”

I laugh.

“Speaking of which, what do you think about a violinist to play during dinner?”

“Ooh. I like that. Do it.”

“I’ll set it up,” Theresa says.

“Just do whatever you have to do to make me look really good, T.”

“Don’t I always, Josh? Speaking of which, I just bought you three new Anthony Franco suits from his new collection, already tailored to fit you to a tee. Do you want them loaded onto the truck or sent in a garment bag with you on the plane? ”

“Is one of them blue, by any chance?”

She grins. “Of course. Sapphire blue to match your eyes.”

“Garment bag for the blue one, truck for the others. I’ll wear the blue one Thursday night.” I wink. “Gotta look sharp for my big night.”

“Oh, it’s a big night?”

“It sure is. I’m finally gonna talk about my fucking feelings—to a girl. ”

“To a girl ? Ooooh. Wow. That is big.” She beams a huge smile at me. “Lucky girl.”

“That’s what I told her.”

Theresa laughs.

“I’m not kidding, unfortunately. That’s exactly what I told her.”

Theresa grimaces.

“Yeah. So now I’ve got my work cut out for me to get myself out of the doghouse.”

“Ooph. I think we’d better add a cellist. Sounds like an emergency.”

My smile broadens. “Thanks, T.”

“You’re very welcome, Josh.”

“I mean, you know, thanks for everything.”

“Just doing my job.”

“Hey, how about we make that raise thirty percent? Sound good?”

Theresa makes a “meh” face. “Well, thirty percent is certainly good. Nothing to sneeze at—believe me, I’m grateful for your generosity. But you only live once, right? Why not ‘go big or go home,’ I always say?”

“Ah, you want ‘the whole nine yards,’ huh, T?”

Theresa laughs. “You’ve rubbed off on me, I guess.”

“Okay. Forty percent. But that’s my final offer.”

Theresa nods. “I think that sounds about right.” She winks.

I laugh. “Okay. Forty it is—until the next time you squeeze me, that is.” With that, I turn around and waltz out my front door, a spring in my step and a gleam in my eye for the first time in an entire fucking week.